The Pony Pals have grown too big for ponies...
They are now known as THE HORSE COMPANIONS!
Horse Companions #1: Lulu's Return
After 6 years apart, the Pony Pals (ahem, Horse Companions) are finally reunited for their senior year of high school when Lulu comes back to Wiggins. But things are different between them now. Lulu doesn't like to ride anymore! Anna's happy with Charlie, but now that Lulu's back in town, she can't seem to choose between them! Pam was happy when Lulu left, but now that she's back, in seems everyone is back under her spell. Will the three ever be friends again?
Coming soon, summer 2009!
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Monday, June 8, 2009
Friday, May 8, 2009
Apologies are in order
It's been almost a year since I posted last.
But I got bored and decided to reacquaint myself with Madison Finn.
Surprise!
Comments!
This never happens!
And I got two requests to finish up the Madison Finn series, which has been long overdue, so I'm sorry.
But it would be fun to reread the series again, and there are only a couple of books left, so I'll...think about it?
I don't know.
It was also cool to see death threats.
Really, death threats.
It was kind of thrilling. I've never ever been the recipient of a death threat.
Well, that's not true.
But online death threats are a whole nother ball game.
My favorite one was, "Rudeness. The end."
Well, yeah.
To those who pointed out that I need to get a life, didn't I mention that myself in several posts?
But honestly? It turns out you don't need one, so those assertions didn't really hurt all that much.
And, frankly, I would LOVE to have goth makeup put on me while I was asleep. If I'm going to start wearing makeup, I might as well start doing it right.
So, yes, I'm sorry if I was overly harsh and insulted your favorite characters.
But, other than that, we live in a sort of free country where freedom of speech exists.
Never mind, I'm sorry. That's the lamest excuse ever, and I hate it when people use it, so I take that back.
Anyway, since the Madison Finn series went unfinished and there are new Avalons coming out (YES!!!), I'll keep posting, so keep commenting and sending death threats!!!
But I got bored and decided to reacquaint myself with Madison Finn.
Surprise!
Comments!
This never happens!
And I got two requests to finish up the Madison Finn series, which has been long overdue, so I'm sorry.
But it would be fun to reread the series again, and there are only a couple of books left, so I'll...think about it?
I don't know.
It was also cool to see death threats.
Really, death threats.
It was kind of thrilling. I've never ever been the recipient of a death threat.
Well, that's not true.
But online death threats are a whole nother ball game.
My favorite one was, "Rudeness. The end."
Well, yeah.
To those who pointed out that I need to get a life, didn't I mention that myself in several posts?
But honestly? It turns out you don't need one, so those assertions didn't really hurt all that much.
And, frankly, I would LOVE to have goth makeup put on me while I was asleep. If I'm going to start wearing makeup, I might as well start doing it right.
So, yes, I'm sorry if I was overly harsh and insulted your favorite characters.
But, other than that, we live in a sort of free country where freedom of speech exists.
Never mind, I'm sorry. That's the lamest excuse ever, and I hate it when people use it, so I take that back.
Anyway, since the Madison Finn series went unfinished and there are new Avalons coming out (YES!!!), I'll keep posting, so keep commenting and sending death threats!!!
Monday, June 9, 2008
CSI is so passe, or FTFO Madison Finn #17: On the Case
This is one of the ones that I could never remember the title to. Seriously, I could rattle off all 25 Madison Finn titles...except this one. I don't know why. It wasn't very exciting.
Plot: Madison loves "Crime Time", an exciting TV show where crimes are solved!!! Sounds like the Far Hills version of CSI. Soon, Madison begins to think SHE can solve crimes!!
People humor her for a little while, and she ends up solving a few petty cases (like The Case of the Missing Keys and The Case of the Lost Kittens), but then she stumbles across a real live mystery at her very own school!
It seems Mr. Olivetti, Madison's flute teacher, lost a very important piece of music. Some people believe it was stolen.
Madison rushes to track down the supposed thief, but does so without the support of her BFF, Aimee. In fact, Aimee seems to think all this Private Investigation is *gasp* DUMB!! The two have several nasty fights, and it seems they will NEVER be friends again!
Thankfully, Madison crashes and burns just in time: the music wasn't STOLEN, just misplaced, and the person she had been suspecting was innocent. Madison admitted how stupid she was to her friends and they welcomed her back with open arms. Sort of.
More notes:
Dang. Maddie is obsessed. She doesn't eat dinner and yells at her mom when she interrupts "Crime Time". And she has a crush on Major Demille. I mean, what freak has a crush on characters from TV...?
Besides me?
Argh. Francine turns off the TV because it isn't proper viewing material...then turns it back on because her daughter complains. Way to be consistent.
Fun, Fiona comes over to watch a "Crime Time" marathon. Par-tay. Actually, I did that with my friend back in the day. We watched nothing but MTV for six hours.
"Fiona had been "going out" (at least that's what they called it) with one of Madison's best guy friends, Walter "Egg" Diaz, for a little while. At first, Madison had hated the idea of their dating, but she was getting used to it over time."
WHOA WHOA WHOA. Madison hated that Egg and Fiona were together??? WHEN??? I don't remember that EVER. She was always like, "Hey, Fiona, go jump in Egg's lap!"
I hate when Madison gets serious about stupid things.
Tonight, we meet a robber who wears a different disguise for every robbery he commits. Last week, he broke into houses wearing a rabbit suit. Yesterday, he knocked off a bank wearing a red beard and a patch over one eye. Tomorrow, who knows what he'll be wearing?
Fiona: A hula skirt. HAHAHAHA.
Madison: Fiona, these are serious crimes.
Fiona: Serious? In a rabbit suit?
Yeah, Maddie, lighten up.
Ugh, lame, the episode is based on true events, and the girls hear "scary noises" so they assume it's THE MASKED AVENGER.
It's just AIMEE, of course!! She wants to join their party!
Egg is jealous of Major Demille???
"Who is that turkey?"
Lol. I'll be saying that a lot from now on.
Madison is being spazzy with Hart again!!
Madison: Hi, Hart.
Hart: I saw you earlier. I guess you didn't see me.
Madison: Oh? No, I guess I didn't. I've been a little preoccupied today. Sorry.
Hart: So, what's up? Why are you so preoccupied?
Madison: Yes.
Hart: Huh?
Madison: I'm fine.
Hart: *sigh* Actually, what I asked you was-
Madison: Do you ever watch "Crime Time"?
Hart is still being way mean to Ivy...but she IS pretty annoying.
Hart plays piano??? Random.
Yay, Blossom's puppies are mentioned!
Ew, Hart adopted one of them and named it Bones Jones.
Aimee kept two of the puppies and named them Yin and Yang. Or rather, her mom did. Ha ha, let's make New Age jokes! -_-
Oh no, some of Madison's things are missing!! Sounds like a mystery.
Phin took them and made a Madison shrine. Weird.
Tie did that. Well, she took my stuff, but didn't make a shrine out of it.
She just chewed most of it.
Ugh, Maddie reminds me so much of the Pony Pals. They were obsessed with snooping and solving mysteries, too.
Fall Fling-A-Ding?? No comment.
"She had just been ogling a pair of cute corduroy pants with flowers embroidered near the cuff."
I try to avoid the word ogling. Sounds pervy.
Madison eavesdrops on a conversation between two nameless girls...and it sounds suspicious.
Well, it does to her, anyway. They sound like they're talking about drugs or a concert. Okay, I guess drugs are pretty suspicious.
Madison: Excuse me.
8th grader: Yeah? What are you looking at?
Madison: Um, I thought you were...I thought...I heard...girls....
LOL. I heard girls.
Madison picks up a scrap of paper with a date, time, and address. Drug deal...or fabulous party??
Ivy seems way jealous of Madison these days. She tells Madison to back away from Hart.
Argh. Mr. Olivetti, Madison's flute teacher, is Italian, so he has the stupid Mario/Luigi accent.
Madison needs better comebacks. She loses another Ivy showdown.
AAargh, I can't believe she's SERIOUS!!
Madison: Don't you think I was pretty clever, Dad, for figuring out what Phin was doing?
Dad: Very, very clever.
Madison: Cut it out, Dad! I was thinking...maybe I should be a detective when I grow up.
Don't encourage her, Stephanie!
"A detective! That's what I wanted to be when I was your age! Believe it or not, Maddie. Sometimes my friends used to call me Sleuthie instead of Stephie at my high school back in Texas."
Stephanie often talks to Madison like she's a little kid. Or just stupid.
Dan is sort of stalking Madison still.
Lame. Some ninth graders randomly come up and start calling Dan a fatty.
"Madison felt her fists clench.
If she were only a little taller...and a little stronger..."
It wouldn't do any good, Maddie. Dan would NOT thank you.
The only reason Dan asked Madison to help him at the animal shelter is because there's an EMERGENCY!!
Someone keeps taking the animals out of their cages! And taking dog treats and chew toys!
And he hasn't told his mom.
Madison suspects Lana.
"LANA! IT'S YOU!"
Lana dies of cardiac arrest.
She just wanted to hold the kittens and feed the puppies!!
How did Madison know?? Cat hair on her sweater.
Okay, so stupid. Eileen, Dan's mom, doesn't fire Lana because it's NOT THAT BIG A DEAL. Dan's like, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH SHE BROKE THE RULES!"
What?? Major Demille is blonde with blue eyes. Reggie, Bigwheels' BF, was last described as having black hair and hazel eyes.
But, somehow, Reggie looks like Major Demille? HOW??
Madison literally wants to be the next Nancy Drew.
Too bad Emma Roberts put you out of a job.
Madison's friends hate it when Ivy makes fun of people, but then they gossip in front of Lana and tell everyone how she "stole" the kittens. It's so mean!
Aimee thinks all this detective work is stupid and that Madison is a little obsessed.
Whoa...could it be? Am I on Aimee's side for once?
Yay, the whole gang is going to see "Curse of the Diamond"!
I wonder if that's the next Indiana Jones sequel.
Ew, I hate it when people have to make it a COUPLE THING.
Aimee doesn't want to go, so Madison might not have a movie "partner" if Hart doesn't ask her!
Lindsay gossips SO MUCH! She's always like, "Omg, guys, I heard a juicy rumor!"
So much for learning her lesson after The Wall incident.
Hm, it seems like some precious object has been stolen at school.
"What does 'precious object' mean? Sounds like a bunch of hooey."
Golly gee, Aimee, that sure sounds like a bunch of hooey, by George.
Lindsay and Fiona think the teachers should come to Maddie for help.
How can they say that with a straight face?
SO UNCALLED FOR!!!
Aimee: I just think you should watch your back.
Madison: You're just made because I might get noticed for this and I have a guy who likes me....
TAKE IT BACK! TAKE IT BACK NOW! Why is Madison such a loser in this book?
Of course, Madison assumes Ivy is the thief. Because she hates her.
Glad to know she's not blinded by prejudice or anything.
"I have nothing else to say to you," is either the lamest comeback ever...or the best.
Madison goes to the address on the slip of paper...and it's a PARTY.
So much for encriminating evidence.
She meets Mariah, Egg's sister, and Mariah's friend Penelope...
...and Penelope is one of the suspicious girls from the library!
Madison thinks it's weird that Penelope is nice.
What's wrong with being nice? Some people are just bubbly like that.
She sees the initials PKO on Penelope's bag.
OH NO! Could it be O for Olivetti?
Um, how about P for Penelope??? You don't know her last name; it probably starts with an O. STupid.
Uh oh. Madison and Aimee have a BIG FIGHT.
BalletGrl: u really expect me 2 believe that there's some school conspiracy and people r stealing bags it sounds dumb
MadFinn: not people stealing bags just 1 person P. and how can you say it's DUMB
BalletGrl: it seems dumb that's all sorry
MadFinn: WELL YOU ARE DUMB
Then, though she feels guilty, she chooses to watch a new episode of "Crime Time" rather than apologize to her best friend.
This relationship is destined to fail.
Madison thinks up an alias using all of her favorite girl names:
Charlotte Helena Isobel Marguerite Phoebe Antoinette
Yeah. That's a good one. Not suspicious at all.
Madison can't understand why Aimee is so moody. After all, Madison supports her ballet; why can't Aimee accept her detectiving???
What a stupid question. SHe can't be serious.
Hm. The stolen item turns out to be old sheet music.
WHY WOULD YOU TAKE THAT TO SCHOOL??? OF COURSE IT'S GOING TO GET STOLEN!
Uh oh. Fiona and Egg are having problems.
They had a big fight...but Fiona can't remember what it was about. Riiight.
Madison: You guys can't both bail out of going to the movies! That isn't fair.
Aimee: Isn't fair for who? Can't you make goo-goo eyes at Hart if you go by yourself?
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!
They start fighting again, and Fiona's like, "Um, um, LET'S MAKE COOKIES!"
Madison questions the staff members...and they're not allowed to reveal any information about the theft.
"Why so bummed out? Did Hart just dump you?"
Oh...hello, Ivy.
Seriously, Mr. Olivetti is dumb. If you bring something REALLY valuable to school, it's most likely going to get stolen.
Madison hears Ivy say, "I can't believe I got away with it!"
But she was only referring to getting away with wearing a semi-scandalous top.
Uh oh, Hart didn't call to tell Madison about the change in movie times. He must not want to be her "partner" for the movies after all.
You actually need a chaperone to get into a PG-13 movie if you're under 13?? Weird. Never happened to me.
Oooh, Madison gets to sit next to Hart in the car.
Hm, could Chet be interested in Aimee??
Madison decides to rethink her alias. Hm, how about making an acronym of her favorite names?
Charlotte Helena Isobel Marguerite Phoebe Antoinette - otherwise known as CHIMPA!
Then it hits her: FINNSTER is the perfect alias!!
Because no one will know it's really you, even though your LAST NAME is FINN.
Madison decides to confront Penelope about the black bag and ASK her if she stole the music.
Yeah, that'll go over well.
"Oh, my God, who are you? Nancy Drew?"
Might as well admit it, Madison.
IT'S NOT MR. OLIVETTI'S BAG! PENELOPE IS INNOCENT!
Can you say no duh??? PKO are, of course, HER initials, and it was just in the band room because she left it in there after band class!!!
Madison's like...*blink blink blink* "May I see inside your bag?"
I applaud Penelope for not slapping her.
Madison starts doodling and it somehow ALL GOES TERRIBLY WRONG.
Madison Demille
Maddie Demille
Mrs. Demille
Finnster Demille
Madison Jones
Mrs. Jones
Surprise!
Mr. Olivetti's music wasn't STOLEN...he LOST IT.
Of course. My dad does that EVERY DAY.
Heh, it would be so funny if Mr. Olivetti had stolen the music in the first place!
Uh oh. Even Hart is laughing at Madison's mistake.
Wow, did Penelope tell everyone? Harsh.
Ivy starts to make fun of her...but Hart stands up for her!! Yay, Hart to the rescue!
"She had it coming, Finnster."
It is sort of all Lindsay's fault.
Aww, I love Dan so much.
Just like when she was sick, Dan is the only one who e-mails her and makes her feel better.
"Madison realized what a good friend Dan was. He always had something supportive and nice to say."
Awwwww.
Argh. Aimee and Madison make up over the internet.
They fought over the internet, they made up over the internet...their relationship seems way fake.
Then again, I'm not one to talk.
And Aimee, for some inexplicable reason, admits that she's too obsessed with dance and that Madison was right all along.
Uhhh...not really.
Madison's Computer Tip:
Use a computer document to make lists and keep track of pals and enemies.
Okay. I'll remember that, Madison.
Ugh. I hate that one. It's always been one of my least favorite books. That and #19. #18 sucks, too, and I'll post that tomorrow. It's more Madison/Aimee drama.
Plot: Madison loves "Crime Time", an exciting TV show where crimes are solved!!! Sounds like the Far Hills version of CSI. Soon, Madison begins to think SHE can solve crimes!!
People humor her for a little while, and she ends up solving a few petty cases (like The Case of the Missing Keys and The Case of the Lost Kittens), but then she stumbles across a real live mystery at her very own school!
It seems Mr. Olivetti, Madison's flute teacher, lost a very important piece of music. Some people believe it was stolen.
Madison rushes to track down the supposed thief, but does so without the support of her BFF, Aimee. In fact, Aimee seems to think all this Private Investigation is *gasp* DUMB!! The two have several nasty fights, and it seems they will NEVER be friends again!
Thankfully, Madison crashes and burns just in time: the music wasn't STOLEN, just misplaced, and the person she had been suspecting was innocent. Madison admitted how stupid she was to her friends and they welcomed her back with open arms. Sort of.
More notes:
Dang. Maddie is obsessed. She doesn't eat dinner and yells at her mom when she interrupts "Crime Time". And she has a crush on Major Demille. I mean, what freak has a crush on characters from TV...?
Besides me?
Argh. Francine turns off the TV because it isn't proper viewing material...then turns it back on because her daughter complains. Way to be consistent.
Fun, Fiona comes over to watch a "Crime Time" marathon. Par-tay. Actually, I did that with my friend back in the day. We watched nothing but MTV for six hours.
"Fiona had been "going out" (at least that's what they called it) with one of Madison's best guy friends, Walter "Egg" Diaz, for a little while. At first, Madison had hated the idea of their dating, but she was getting used to it over time."
WHOA WHOA WHOA. Madison hated that Egg and Fiona were together??? WHEN??? I don't remember that EVER. She was always like, "Hey, Fiona, go jump in Egg's lap!"
I hate when Madison gets serious about stupid things.
Tonight, we meet a robber who wears a different disguise for every robbery he commits. Last week, he broke into houses wearing a rabbit suit. Yesterday, he knocked off a bank wearing a red beard and a patch over one eye. Tomorrow, who knows what he'll be wearing?
Fiona: A hula skirt. HAHAHAHA.
Madison: Fiona, these are serious crimes.
Fiona: Serious? In a rabbit suit?
Yeah, Maddie, lighten up.
Ugh, lame, the episode is based on true events, and the girls hear "scary noises" so they assume it's THE MASKED AVENGER.
It's just AIMEE, of course!! She wants to join their party!
Egg is jealous of Major Demille???
"Who is that turkey?"
Lol. I'll be saying that a lot from now on.
Madison is being spazzy with Hart again!!
Madison: Hi, Hart.
Hart: I saw you earlier. I guess you didn't see me.
Madison: Oh? No, I guess I didn't. I've been a little preoccupied today. Sorry.
Hart: So, what's up? Why are you so preoccupied?
Madison: Yes.
Hart: Huh?
Madison: I'm fine.
Hart: *sigh* Actually, what I asked you was-
Madison: Do you ever watch "Crime Time"?
Hart is still being way mean to Ivy...but she IS pretty annoying.
Hart plays piano??? Random.
Yay, Blossom's puppies are mentioned!
Ew, Hart adopted one of them and named it Bones Jones.
Aimee kept two of the puppies and named them Yin and Yang. Or rather, her mom did. Ha ha, let's make New Age jokes! -_-
Oh no, some of Madison's things are missing!! Sounds like a mystery.
Phin took them and made a Madison shrine. Weird.
Tie did that. Well, she took my stuff, but didn't make a shrine out of it.
She just chewed most of it.
Ugh, Maddie reminds me so much of the Pony Pals. They were obsessed with snooping and solving mysteries, too.
Fall Fling-A-Ding?? No comment.
"She had just been ogling a pair of cute corduroy pants with flowers embroidered near the cuff."
I try to avoid the word ogling. Sounds pervy.
Madison eavesdrops on a conversation between two nameless girls...and it sounds suspicious.
Well, it does to her, anyway. They sound like they're talking about drugs or a concert. Okay, I guess drugs are pretty suspicious.
Madison: Excuse me.
8th grader: Yeah? What are you looking at?
Madison: Um, I thought you were...I thought...I heard...girls....
LOL. I heard girls.
Madison picks up a scrap of paper with a date, time, and address. Drug deal...or fabulous party??
Ivy seems way jealous of Madison these days. She tells Madison to back away from Hart.
Argh. Mr. Olivetti, Madison's flute teacher, is Italian, so he has the stupid Mario/Luigi accent.
Madison needs better comebacks. She loses another Ivy showdown.
AAargh, I can't believe she's SERIOUS!!
Madison: Don't you think I was pretty clever, Dad, for figuring out what Phin was doing?
Dad: Very, very clever.
Madison: Cut it out, Dad! I was thinking...maybe I should be a detective when I grow up.
Don't encourage her, Stephanie!
"A detective! That's what I wanted to be when I was your age! Believe it or not, Maddie. Sometimes my friends used to call me Sleuthie instead of Stephie at my high school back in Texas."
Stephanie often talks to Madison like she's a little kid. Or just stupid.
Dan is sort of stalking Madison still.
Lame. Some ninth graders randomly come up and start calling Dan a fatty.
"Madison felt her fists clench.
If she were only a little taller...and a little stronger..."
It wouldn't do any good, Maddie. Dan would NOT thank you.
The only reason Dan asked Madison to help him at the animal shelter is because there's an EMERGENCY!!
Someone keeps taking the animals out of their cages! And taking dog treats and chew toys!
And he hasn't told his mom.
Madison suspects Lana.
"LANA! IT'S YOU!"
Lana dies of cardiac arrest.
She just wanted to hold the kittens and feed the puppies!!
How did Madison know?? Cat hair on her sweater.
Okay, so stupid. Eileen, Dan's mom, doesn't fire Lana because it's NOT THAT BIG A DEAL. Dan's like, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH SHE BROKE THE RULES!"
What?? Major Demille is blonde with blue eyes. Reggie, Bigwheels' BF, was last described as having black hair and hazel eyes.
But, somehow, Reggie looks like Major Demille? HOW??
Madison literally wants to be the next Nancy Drew.
Too bad Emma Roberts put you out of a job.
Madison's friends hate it when Ivy makes fun of people, but then they gossip in front of Lana and tell everyone how she "stole" the kittens. It's so mean!
Aimee thinks all this detective work is stupid and that Madison is a little obsessed.
Whoa...could it be? Am I on Aimee's side for once?
Yay, the whole gang is going to see "Curse of the Diamond"!
I wonder if that's the next Indiana Jones sequel.
Ew, I hate it when people have to make it a COUPLE THING.
Aimee doesn't want to go, so Madison might not have a movie "partner" if Hart doesn't ask her!
Lindsay gossips SO MUCH! She's always like, "Omg, guys, I heard a juicy rumor!"
So much for learning her lesson after The Wall incident.
Hm, it seems like some precious object has been stolen at school.
"What does 'precious object' mean? Sounds like a bunch of hooey."
Golly gee, Aimee, that sure sounds like a bunch of hooey, by George.
Lindsay and Fiona think the teachers should come to Maddie for help.
How can they say that with a straight face?
SO UNCALLED FOR!!!
Aimee: I just think you should watch your back.
Madison: You're just made because I might get noticed for this and I have a guy who likes me....
TAKE IT BACK! TAKE IT BACK NOW! Why is Madison such a loser in this book?
Of course, Madison assumes Ivy is the thief. Because she hates her.
Glad to know she's not blinded by prejudice or anything.
"I have nothing else to say to you," is either the lamest comeback ever...or the best.
Madison goes to the address on the slip of paper...and it's a PARTY.
So much for encriminating evidence.
She meets Mariah, Egg's sister, and Mariah's friend Penelope...
...and Penelope is one of the suspicious girls from the library!
Madison thinks it's weird that Penelope is nice.
What's wrong with being nice? Some people are just bubbly like that.
She sees the initials PKO on Penelope's bag.
OH NO! Could it be O for Olivetti?
Um, how about P for Penelope??? You don't know her last name; it probably starts with an O. STupid.
Uh oh. Madison and Aimee have a BIG FIGHT.
BalletGrl: u really expect me 2 believe that there's some school conspiracy and people r stealing bags it sounds dumb
MadFinn: not people stealing bags just 1 person P. and how can you say it's DUMB
BalletGrl: it seems dumb that's all sorry
MadFinn: WELL YOU ARE DUMB
Then, though she feels guilty, she chooses to watch a new episode of "Crime Time" rather than apologize to her best friend.
This relationship is destined to fail.
Madison thinks up an alias using all of her favorite girl names:
Charlotte Helena Isobel Marguerite Phoebe Antoinette
Yeah. That's a good one. Not suspicious at all.
Madison can't understand why Aimee is so moody. After all, Madison supports her ballet; why can't Aimee accept her detectiving???
What a stupid question. SHe can't be serious.
Hm. The stolen item turns out to be old sheet music.
WHY WOULD YOU TAKE THAT TO SCHOOL??? OF COURSE IT'S GOING TO GET STOLEN!
Uh oh. Fiona and Egg are having problems.
They had a big fight...but Fiona can't remember what it was about. Riiight.
Madison: You guys can't both bail out of going to the movies! That isn't fair.
Aimee: Isn't fair for who? Can't you make goo-goo eyes at Hart if you go by yourself?
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!
They start fighting again, and Fiona's like, "Um, um, LET'S MAKE COOKIES!"
Madison questions the staff members...and they're not allowed to reveal any information about the theft.
"Why so bummed out? Did Hart just dump you?"
Oh...hello, Ivy.
Seriously, Mr. Olivetti is dumb. If you bring something REALLY valuable to school, it's most likely going to get stolen.
Madison hears Ivy say, "I can't believe I got away with it!"
But she was only referring to getting away with wearing a semi-scandalous top.
Uh oh, Hart didn't call to tell Madison about the change in movie times. He must not want to be her "partner" for the movies after all.
You actually need a chaperone to get into a PG-13 movie if you're under 13?? Weird. Never happened to me.
Oooh, Madison gets to sit next to Hart in the car.
Hm, could Chet be interested in Aimee??
Madison decides to rethink her alias. Hm, how about making an acronym of her favorite names?
Charlotte Helena Isobel Marguerite Phoebe Antoinette - otherwise known as CHIMPA!
Then it hits her: FINNSTER is the perfect alias!!
Because no one will know it's really you, even though your LAST NAME is FINN.
Madison decides to confront Penelope about the black bag and ASK her if she stole the music.
Yeah, that'll go over well.
"Oh, my God, who are you? Nancy Drew?"
Might as well admit it, Madison.
IT'S NOT MR. OLIVETTI'S BAG! PENELOPE IS INNOCENT!
Can you say no duh??? PKO are, of course, HER initials, and it was just in the band room because she left it in there after band class!!!
Madison's like...*blink blink blink* "May I see inside your bag?"
I applaud Penelope for not slapping her.
Madison starts doodling and it somehow ALL GOES TERRIBLY WRONG.
Madison Demille
Maddie Demille
Mrs. Demille
Finnster Demille
Madison Jones
Mrs. Jones
Surprise!
Mr. Olivetti's music wasn't STOLEN...he LOST IT.
Of course. My dad does that EVERY DAY.
Heh, it would be so funny if Mr. Olivetti had stolen the music in the first place!
Uh oh. Even Hart is laughing at Madison's mistake.
Wow, did Penelope tell everyone? Harsh.
Ivy starts to make fun of her...but Hart stands up for her!! Yay, Hart to the rescue!
"She had it coming, Finnster."
It is sort of all Lindsay's fault.
Aww, I love Dan so much.
Just like when she was sick, Dan is the only one who e-mails her and makes her feel better.
"Madison realized what a good friend Dan was. He always had something supportive and nice to say."
Awwwww.
Argh. Aimee and Madison make up over the internet.
They fought over the internet, they made up over the internet...their relationship seems way fake.
Then again, I'm not one to talk.
And Aimee, for some inexplicable reason, admits that she's too obsessed with dance and that Madison was right all along.
Uhhh...not really.
Madison's Computer Tip:
Use a computer document to make lists and keep track of pals and enemies.
Okay. I'll remember that, Madison.
Ugh. I hate that one. It's always been one of my least favorite books. That and #19. #18 sucks, too, and I'll post that tomorrow. It's more Madison/Aimee drama.
Saturday, June 7, 2008
There's just something about older men, or FTFO Madison Finn #16: Three's a Crowd
As school has been ending and Tie has been chewing up all my slippers, there's nothing I've felt like doing less than posting on this blog.
Wait. Does that sentence even work?
Oh well. I've just been busy. I think I read this book sometime in the beginning of May, too. I probably won't remember what the page markers even mean.
Plot: Madison feels terrible. She has the flu and is being forced to stay home for close to a week!! Not that she cares; who likes school?
She starts to go a little stir-crazy, however, when her busy mom calls Gramma Helen over from Chicago to take care of Madison, and Gramma Helen is very old-fashioned. Madison isn't even allowed to go on her laptop!!
The final straw is when Madison notices a cute guy who lives across the street. Whaaat??? How could she have not noticed him before??? His name is Josh, he plays hockey, and communicates with Madison via bedroom window (he writes notes for her to see, like, "How R U?").
When Madison finally gets back to school, she is in LUV. She follows Josh around, has lots of wonderfuly intellectual conversations with him, and ends up blowing off Hart several times. Uh oh.
One day, while at Freeze Palace with her dad, Madison runs into Josh...and his GIRLFRIEND!!! :O
She is heartbroken, of course.
Then her friends cheer her up and Madison realizes they never had a chance anyway.
Then she goes off and hangs with Hart.
More notes:
Today's Mental Floss:
If an international airliner crashed exactly on the U.S.-Mexican border, where would authorities be required to bury the survivors!!
When I first got this book, I tried to figure this out for 10 minutes and failed.
They have a big English assignment on any topic of their choosing - except for extreme sports, serial killers, video games, or biographies of current celebrities, rap stars, or sports stars.
There goes my idea.
Weird. Madison and Fiona get sick at the SAME TIME.
Egg and Fiona are so weird and couple-y. It would be super awkward to hang out with them.
Back to the mental floss: Why would anyone bury survivors??? HAHAHAHA! Dang. I wish I'd guessed that.
"Get thyselves to the nurse's office, young ladies, before we all catch your bugs, okay?"
Why is Mr. Gibbons trying to sound like Shakespeare?
Nurse Shim still creeps me out.
Whoa, they all have fevers of 102.
Aimee's sick, too!! Weeeird.
AAAAGH. I hate that you can't leave school when you're sick without parental consent, even if you live 2 minutes away. I couldn't get ahold of either parent for a LONG TIME when I got sick and they almost made me stay and suffer at school. Raaaah.
But Madison finally called her dad, like I did, so she was able to go home.
OMG!!! Madison sneezes on Hart's sweater, and I mean SNEEZES. There's a HUGE loogie on his shirt.
But Hart seems to be okay with it?
Ewww, tofu broth!!?? Who would want to drink that when they're sick? Wouldn't it just make them sicker?
My brother started eating tofu recently, and he says it tastes like a diaper, but he loves it.
Possibly because he pours Johnny's Tenderizing Seasoning Salt all over it before he eats it.
Mom: You know what? You look pale.
Madison: But I always look pale, don't I?
We were talking about that in jazz band. Paul felt the need to mention that I was the second-whitest kid in school, after him. Thanks, Paul.
Psych, Madison has bronchitis.
And her friends just have colds. How lame is that?
Madison's mom and dad always pick fights. Not awkward, or anything.
But Jeff comes over with chicken, and Fran offers him wine when she knows he doesn't drink?
"Well, I'll leave you to your chicken."
That sounds so weird, but fun to say.
Sick people just want TLC.
"It was a boy. He had red hair, or at least it appeared red under the street lamp. He wore an old corduroy jacket, ripped jeans, and lumberjack boots. The big dog sniffed madly at a hydrant."
Lol. In 7th grade there was a boy in my neighborhood with dachsunds, and I was like, "Omg, boyz!!" But he's shorter than me, now, and I don't know what happened to his dogs.
Yay!! If my grandma came over to take care of me when I was sick, I'd be so excited.
Only my grandma lives in Washington, so I see her all the time.
If Grandma Nina came over, it'd be pretty cool, though. I haven't seen her in 2 years.
Awww, Dan e-mails her. I love that boy.
Someone told me ur sick. No way b/c I am @ the clinic $ there are 5 lizards here right now and they are sick 2!!! I had 2 tell u b/c u always laff @ stuff like that.
He names the lizards Wizzy, Fizzy, Dizzy, Tizzy, and Lizzy.
-_-
Then Egg offers to pick up her and Fiona's homework.
At the end of the e-mail, he grudgingly offers to pick up Aimee's, too. Lol.
Hey, you can like 2 guys at the same time. Nothing wrong with that.
Strange. Gramma Helen got a fortune cookie that said she would be traveling to faraway places, and here she is in New York!
Connor got one that said, "You like Chinese Food."
Lol, Gramma's like, "You lay in bed, and I'll run a eucalyptus bubble bath and make some saltwater gurgle while the cold-air vaporizer charges," and Madison's like, "Whatever, Gramma, can we just play cards?"
The girls always talk about how mean Poison Ivy is, but Lindsay sends them this e-mail that's practically 8 pages of ridiculing her outfit.
I guess she never really got over the whole "Fat Camp Loser" thing.
:O HART BLEW OFF POISON IVY!!
They were supposed to work on the English project together, but he stood her up and then pretended not to know what she was talking about.
Okay, even if it is Poison Ivy, that's really mean. Hart's a jerk.
Hart might like another girl besides Ivy...but that could be anyone.
Come on, Madison, it's so you.
Chicken lemon orzo soup???
I'd rather have orange juice and crackers.
Bigwheels is all, "Omg, I found this website where you can send free e-cards!!"
Aren't there millions of those sites around??? They're not exactly a new invention, Bigwheels.
Madison tells Bigwheels about the new boy:
"I had this dream last night that he was spying on me and wanted to meet me."
Wow. That would've creeped me out.
Agh, I love optical illusions, which is what Madison, Aimee, Fiona, and Lindsay pick for their English project.
I remember reading "The Outsiders"!
"Stay gold, Ponyboy."
Egg comes over with Madison's homework, and Gramma Helen FREAKS OUT. "Did I meet this boy the last time I visited? Why are boys calling on you when you're sick in bed?"
She sounds like my dad. Kevin, Alexis, and I bought ice cream at 7/11 and my dad was like, "Who's he?? Is he your friend? Is he in band? Well, of course he's in band. Oh, hi Alexis."
WHOA. Egg apparently knows EVERYTHING about Madison's hot neighbor! His name's Josh, he's in 9th grade (ooooh, an older boy! Lol), he plays hockey, and is friends with Drew.
Then Egg suddenly gets defensive and is like, "What about Hart, Maddie?"
ROFL! "I thought you dug Hart."
Can you dig it? Yes, I can. I've been waiting such a long time for Saturday.
Sorry. Chicago moment.
Oooooh. Egg crushes all of Maddie's hopes and dreams!
Madison: Does Hart know...that I like him?
Egg: I think so. But so what? He doesn't care.
:O WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT???
Madison: He doesn't care?
Egg: I don't know what he thinks. We don't really talk about it.
EGG! THAT'S DIFFERENT THAN NOT CARING!!
What is it about older guys that make girls giggle incessantly???
Possibly because all the guys our own age aren't as hot??
Bigwheels sends this dumb list of things to do when you're sick. It's supposed to be hilarious.
Gramma's like, "A laptop? How fascinating. Show me how this titillating contraption works! I want to send an e-mail to Mabel!"
Frannie thinks work is more important than her daughter. How lame is that?
Whatever happened to Blossom's puppies? I want one.
Lindsay stalks Josh for a day and finds out the following information:
His full name is Josh Turner.
He's in 9th grade.
He plays hockey.
He also plays the accordion AND the tuba????
He's single.
Madison has cute pajama pants. I'm sort of jealous.
Then again, I have boxers!! :P
AAAAGH!! She spies Josh through her window.
He says "Hi There" and then goes to bed when Madison can't think up a fitting reply.
The secret is revealed:
Maybe I'll see him in the hallway and he'll ask me to have lunch with him at his table in the cafeteria. That would just burn Poison Ivy if I got to sit with the ninth graders at lunch!!
:P The girls at my school who are dating juniors are so annoying, like they're so much better than the rest of us. But, then again, it would be cool to be like, "Hehehe, your boyriend is 5'6". My boyfriend can drive...AND SHAVE!"
Ew. It's so nasty when you don't shower or change clothes when you're sick.
OMG, HART WAS ASKING ABOUT MADISON AT SCHOOL.
He asked Dan, which is sort of cold.
"I'm worried about the girl we both like, Dan. Do you know anything about her? Is she feeling okay?"
Hart is SUCH A JERK to have led Poison Ivy on this whole time. He thinks she's annoying and has an attitude and wishes she would just go away.
WHY DIDN'T YOU THINK THAT BEFORE??? She's shown her true colors so many times. Why do you have to be so mean NOW?
Uh oh. Would having a ninth-grader boyfriend be cooler than having HART as a boyfriend?
Maddie, say it isn't so!!
Whoas. If my kid was sick, I wouldn't go out of town until they were better.
Geez, Frannie.
Madison "talks" (via window) to Josh again, but he gets bored and turns off his lamp. BAD SIGN.
Madison wishes that Josh Turner would fall madly in love with her.
Awww.
We were watching Pam Stenzel, and she was talking about how older boys are creepy and can't get anyone to date them, so younger girls shouldn't, either.
When you put it that way, it's kind of true.
Frannie is dumping her only kid with Gramma Helen for a week, and when Madison says she wants a little time away from her overly nice old-fashioned Gramma, Fran's all, "You should be grateful, bla bla bla."
Way to justify leaving your sick kid at home. She's probably just leaving to get away from Helen, anyways. Quit being a hypocrite, Fran.
A boy comes to visit...and it's Egg. Again.
Surprise!! Hart and Drew are with him.
Wait...Lindsay made fun of Ivy's brown sweater near the beginning of the book...now Hart's wearing one.
:O!
Was Ivy wearing Hart's sweater??? So much for not liking her.
Or maybe...WHOA! This is like a soap opera!!!
And Hart is still a jerk.
Hart gives her flowers.
Madison's like, "Omg! *swoon*"
But it turns out they were from her dad and were sitting on the front porch.
Ooooooh.
Egg is so mean!
Madison: The flowers are from my dad.
Egg: Duh. Who else would send you flowers?
Surprise! Josh comes over. Madison spazzes out.
Hart tries to engage Madison in conversation, but she's like, "Uh-huh, yeah. So, Josh...."
Then she asks him [Hart] all these questions about Josh. Way to be heartless, Maddie.
Surprise! Madison's hair is a mess and her T-shirt is stained. Mwahaha. Murphy's law.
Gramma turns out to be a Betty. Who dated OLDER BOYS!!
Fran apparently dated every boy in Far Hills.
OMG, GRAMMA DATED SOMEONE FOUR AND A HALF YEARS OLDER THAN HER!! AT 16!!!
That's like me dating my brother. Only we're not related, but it's still semi-illegal, were we to have sex, but we wouldn't, but people would assume he's a pervert anyway, which he probably IS.
Mmm, this older gentlemen was named Charlie Francis. Helen liked the way he wore his ties. Euphemism for something else?
He asked her out when he was 20 and she was SIXTEEN!!!!
They also talk about Mackie, the butcher's son, and Gabriel, a boy in the church choir.
Whoas. They sound dreamy.
Madison thinks she might not like Hart as much!!
Her friends are like, "You can't forget Hart!! Btw, my brother knows Josh, want me to hook you up?"
Gramma wants Madison to go to bed at 8:30.
What? She's not 6!
Now Bigwheels is sick.
She wants to know what happened to Hart, too.
"What had happened to Hart? And what was Madison going to do about her change of heart?"
Mr. Danehy suggests Madison catch up on her science homework with the help of HART JONES.
Coincidence? Or not?
But she forgets about that when Josh comes over and talks to her!!!
Josh: Well...I have class.
Madison: See you through the window!!
Oh, Madison. You have no idea how NERDY that sounded.
Argh!!!! Hart's like, "Madison, can we talk?" and he leaves an empty seat next to him at lunch and EVERYTHING, and Madison's just like, "Whatever."
AAAAARGH!
Lindsay's like, "Let's send Fiona and Aimee an e-mail full of gossip!! Let's tell them about Josh! That's juicy!"
Excuse me, but how??? He's just a cute guy who talked to Madison once, and only to be polite.
M. C. Escher!!
"Tuesday afternoon, after turning in to Blueberry Steet on the walk home from school, Madison spotted Josh. He was way ahead of her, but Madison didn't think. She just started running.
'Hello!' Madison gasped when she caught up to him.
Josh whirled around. 'Whoa. Hello, yourself. I didn't hear you.'
Madison tried to keep from panting, but her mouth was dry from running so fast. She wiped her forehead and tried to look cool.
'Are you okay?' Josh asked. 'You're purple.'
'Oh, I have asthma,' Madison said. It was a strange lie, but it sounded a lot better than, 'Oh, I was just running to catch up to you.'"
OMG!!!! That's so hilarious!! "Oh, I have asthma!"
Josh has a pet poodle named Cuddles. Um...
Gramma Helen is confusing. First, she's like, "Fran, don't ditch your kid!" Then she's like, "Madison, you must understand your mom has a lot on her plate."
They watch Fran's new documentary, which is about AIDs. Gramma even starts crying.
Group hug!
Madison goes out to talk to Josh, and misinterprets all of his actions as, "He thinks I'm cute. He's speechless because I'm so beautiful."
BATTING YOUR EYES DOESN'T WORK.
Josh totally ditches her and is like, "Um, that's nice, I have to help my dad."
I REALLY don't think he likes you, Maddie.
Oh no!! She tries to window-chat with him, and he just goes to bed without answering.
Definitely a bad sign.
Madison tries to make pancakes. "I can't do this!!"
Sorry. Just struck me as funny.
OH NO!!! Hart tries to talk to Maddie and she's like, "Uh-huh. Uh-huh. What are you talking about?"
AAAGH!!1 MADISON FINN!!! DID YOU EVER LEARN SOCIAL SKILLS??
Lindsay: He is cute. I think you would make a nice couple.
Madison: Jeez, Lindsay! Why don't you just announce it over the loudspeaker?
Lol!!
Whatever. Aimee berates Maddie for liking someone who is "practically in high school."
You like someone who is "practically in Mensa", so shut up.
Madison reads an article entitled, "Two's Company, but three's a crowd: How do you choose when you like two?"
But she never gets to finish it, so she still can't decide.
"I think maybe it's a good idea if you're going out with that older guy. Guys our age can be such dorks."
Gusy in GENERAL can be dorks.
Madison sees Josh at Freeze Palace.
"Madison wanted to turn three shades of purple.
I'm with my dad.
It sounded so seventh grade."
Whoa, Madison and Josh have the same favorite ice cream flavor!
Too bad Josh has a girlfriend! Surprise! Her name is Remy...and he had his hand on THE SMALL OF HER BACK. You know what that means.
Madison runs out of the shop and cries the whole way home.
Bigwheels is going out with Reggie again AND her cat is having kittens.
Life is so unfair.
It doesn't seem like such a big deal, but Madison is totally heartbroken. It's really sad.
And she totally saw it coming, anyway.
Aimee is such a horrible friend.
"So that's it? That's the end of Josh? I was getting excited about the prospect of your dating some ninth grader. And then maybe you'd introduce me to some other ninth grader..."
How shallow.
Madison totally blew the Josh thing out of proportion.
HART CALLS!
Madison: What are you guys doing for your Web page project?
Hart: The Titanic.
Madison: That's deep.
Hart: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *more hysterical laughter*
Hart then proceeds to tell her how annoying Ivy is and how she's failing science.
JEEEEEERK.
OMG! He asks her out! Say no! Say yes!
She says yes.
Now they're going to the movies...as a couple...on Saturday!!!
Hart was worth the wait.
Whatever that means.
Madison's Computer Tip:
Use e-mail to keep in touch with friends and family when you're stuck at home.
Wise words.
I'm definitely DONE with the computer for now, so I'm going to chillax!!! (Nickolodeon word!) and read a while. Maybe I'll post on Monday.
Wait. Does that sentence even work?
Oh well. I've just been busy. I think I read this book sometime in the beginning of May, too. I probably won't remember what the page markers even mean.
Plot: Madison feels terrible. She has the flu and is being forced to stay home for close to a week!! Not that she cares; who likes school?
She starts to go a little stir-crazy, however, when her busy mom calls Gramma Helen over from Chicago to take care of Madison, and Gramma Helen is very old-fashioned. Madison isn't even allowed to go on her laptop!!
The final straw is when Madison notices a cute guy who lives across the street. Whaaat??? How could she have not noticed him before??? His name is Josh, he plays hockey, and communicates with Madison via bedroom window (he writes notes for her to see, like, "How R U?").
When Madison finally gets back to school, she is in LUV. She follows Josh around, has lots of wonderfuly intellectual conversations with him, and ends up blowing off Hart several times. Uh oh.
One day, while at Freeze Palace with her dad, Madison runs into Josh...and his GIRLFRIEND!!! :O
She is heartbroken, of course.
Then her friends cheer her up and Madison realizes they never had a chance anyway.
Then she goes off and hangs with Hart.
More notes:
Today's Mental Floss:
If an international airliner crashed exactly on the U.S.-Mexican border, where would authorities be required to bury the survivors!!
When I first got this book, I tried to figure this out for 10 minutes and failed.
They have a big English assignment on any topic of their choosing - except for extreme sports, serial killers, video games, or biographies of current celebrities, rap stars, or sports stars.
There goes my idea.
Weird. Madison and Fiona get sick at the SAME TIME.
Egg and Fiona are so weird and couple-y. It would be super awkward to hang out with them.
Back to the mental floss: Why would anyone bury survivors??? HAHAHAHA! Dang. I wish I'd guessed that.
"Get thyselves to the nurse's office, young ladies, before we all catch your bugs, okay?"
Why is Mr. Gibbons trying to sound like Shakespeare?
Nurse Shim still creeps me out.
Whoa, they all have fevers of 102.
Aimee's sick, too!! Weeeird.
AAAAGH. I hate that you can't leave school when you're sick without parental consent, even if you live 2 minutes away. I couldn't get ahold of either parent for a LONG TIME when I got sick and they almost made me stay and suffer at school. Raaaah.
But Madison finally called her dad, like I did, so she was able to go home.
OMG!!! Madison sneezes on Hart's sweater, and I mean SNEEZES. There's a HUGE loogie on his shirt.
But Hart seems to be okay with it?
Ewww, tofu broth!!?? Who would want to drink that when they're sick? Wouldn't it just make them sicker?
My brother started eating tofu recently, and he says it tastes like a diaper, but he loves it.
Possibly because he pours Johnny's Tenderizing Seasoning Salt all over it before he eats it.
Mom: You know what? You look pale.
Madison: But I always look pale, don't I?
We were talking about that in jazz band. Paul felt the need to mention that I was the second-whitest kid in school, after him. Thanks, Paul.
Psych, Madison has bronchitis.
And her friends just have colds. How lame is that?
Madison's mom and dad always pick fights. Not awkward, or anything.
But Jeff comes over with chicken, and Fran offers him wine when she knows he doesn't drink?
"Well, I'll leave you to your chicken."
That sounds so weird, but fun to say.
Sick people just want TLC.
"It was a boy. He had red hair, or at least it appeared red under the street lamp. He wore an old corduroy jacket, ripped jeans, and lumberjack boots. The big dog sniffed madly at a hydrant."
Lol. In 7th grade there was a boy in my neighborhood with dachsunds, and I was like, "Omg, boyz!!" But he's shorter than me, now, and I don't know what happened to his dogs.
Yay!! If my grandma came over to take care of me when I was sick, I'd be so excited.
Only my grandma lives in Washington, so I see her all the time.
If Grandma Nina came over, it'd be pretty cool, though. I haven't seen her in 2 years.
Awww, Dan e-mails her. I love that boy.
Someone told me ur sick. No way b/c I am @ the clinic $ there are 5 lizards here right now and they are sick 2!!! I had 2 tell u b/c u always laff @ stuff like that.
He names the lizards Wizzy, Fizzy, Dizzy, Tizzy, and Lizzy.
-_-
Then Egg offers to pick up her and Fiona's homework.
At the end of the e-mail, he grudgingly offers to pick up Aimee's, too. Lol.
Hey, you can like 2 guys at the same time. Nothing wrong with that.
Strange. Gramma Helen got a fortune cookie that said she would be traveling to faraway places, and here she is in New York!
Connor got one that said, "You like Chinese Food."
Lol, Gramma's like, "You lay in bed, and I'll run a eucalyptus bubble bath and make some saltwater gurgle while the cold-air vaporizer charges," and Madison's like, "Whatever, Gramma, can we just play cards?"
The girls always talk about how mean Poison Ivy is, but Lindsay sends them this e-mail that's practically 8 pages of ridiculing her outfit.
I guess she never really got over the whole "Fat Camp Loser" thing.
:O HART BLEW OFF POISON IVY!!
They were supposed to work on the English project together, but he stood her up and then pretended not to know what she was talking about.
Okay, even if it is Poison Ivy, that's really mean. Hart's a jerk.
Hart might like another girl besides Ivy...but that could be anyone.
Come on, Madison, it's so you.
Chicken lemon orzo soup???
I'd rather have orange juice and crackers.
Bigwheels is all, "Omg, I found this website where you can send free e-cards!!"
Aren't there millions of those sites around??? They're not exactly a new invention, Bigwheels.
Madison tells Bigwheels about the new boy:
"I had this dream last night that he was spying on me and wanted to meet me."
Wow. That would've creeped me out.
Agh, I love optical illusions, which is what Madison, Aimee, Fiona, and Lindsay pick for their English project.
I remember reading "The Outsiders"!
"Stay gold, Ponyboy."
Egg comes over with Madison's homework, and Gramma Helen FREAKS OUT. "Did I meet this boy the last time I visited? Why are boys calling on you when you're sick in bed?"
She sounds like my dad. Kevin, Alexis, and I bought ice cream at 7/11 and my dad was like, "Who's he?? Is he your friend? Is he in band? Well, of course he's in band. Oh, hi Alexis."
WHOA. Egg apparently knows EVERYTHING about Madison's hot neighbor! His name's Josh, he's in 9th grade (ooooh, an older boy! Lol), he plays hockey, and is friends with Drew.
Then Egg suddenly gets defensive and is like, "What about Hart, Maddie?"
ROFL! "I thought you dug Hart."
Can you dig it? Yes, I can. I've been waiting such a long time for Saturday.
Sorry. Chicago moment.
Oooooh. Egg crushes all of Maddie's hopes and dreams!
Madison: Does Hart know...that I like him?
Egg: I think so. But so what? He doesn't care.
:O WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT???
Madison: He doesn't care?
Egg: I don't know what he thinks. We don't really talk about it.
EGG! THAT'S DIFFERENT THAN NOT CARING!!
What is it about older guys that make girls giggle incessantly???
Possibly because all the guys our own age aren't as hot??
Bigwheels sends this dumb list of things to do when you're sick. It's supposed to be hilarious.
Gramma's like, "A laptop? How fascinating. Show me how this titillating contraption works! I want to send an e-mail to Mabel!"
Frannie thinks work is more important than her daughter. How lame is that?
Whatever happened to Blossom's puppies? I want one.
Lindsay stalks Josh for a day and finds out the following information:
His full name is Josh Turner.
He's in 9th grade.
He plays hockey.
He also plays the accordion AND the tuba????
He's single.
Madison has cute pajama pants. I'm sort of jealous.
Then again, I have boxers!! :P
AAAAGH!! She spies Josh through her window.
He says "Hi There" and then goes to bed when Madison can't think up a fitting reply.
The secret is revealed:
Maybe I'll see him in the hallway and he'll ask me to have lunch with him at his table in the cafeteria. That would just burn Poison Ivy if I got to sit with the ninth graders at lunch!!
:P The girls at my school who are dating juniors are so annoying, like they're so much better than the rest of us. But, then again, it would be cool to be like, "Hehehe, your boyriend is 5'6". My boyfriend can drive...AND SHAVE!"
Ew. It's so nasty when you don't shower or change clothes when you're sick.
OMG, HART WAS ASKING ABOUT MADISON AT SCHOOL.
He asked Dan, which is sort of cold.
"I'm worried about the girl we both like, Dan. Do you know anything about her? Is she feeling okay?"
Hart is SUCH A JERK to have led Poison Ivy on this whole time. He thinks she's annoying and has an attitude and wishes she would just go away.
WHY DIDN'T YOU THINK THAT BEFORE??? She's shown her true colors so many times. Why do you have to be so mean NOW?
Uh oh. Would having a ninth-grader boyfriend be cooler than having HART as a boyfriend?
Maddie, say it isn't so!!
Whoas. If my kid was sick, I wouldn't go out of town until they were better.
Geez, Frannie.
Madison "talks" (via window) to Josh again, but he gets bored and turns off his lamp. BAD SIGN.
Madison wishes that Josh Turner would fall madly in love with her.
Awww.
We were watching Pam Stenzel, and she was talking about how older boys are creepy and can't get anyone to date them, so younger girls shouldn't, either.
When you put it that way, it's kind of true.
Frannie is dumping her only kid with Gramma Helen for a week, and when Madison says she wants a little time away from her overly nice old-fashioned Gramma, Fran's all, "You should be grateful, bla bla bla."
Way to justify leaving your sick kid at home. She's probably just leaving to get away from Helen, anyways. Quit being a hypocrite, Fran.
A boy comes to visit...and it's Egg. Again.
Surprise!! Hart and Drew are with him.
Wait...Lindsay made fun of Ivy's brown sweater near the beginning of the book...now Hart's wearing one.
:O!
Was Ivy wearing Hart's sweater??? So much for not liking her.
Or maybe...WHOA! This is like a soap opera!!!
And Hart is still a jerk.
Hart gives her flowers.
Madison's like, "Omg! *swoon*"
But it turns out they were from her dad and were sitting on the front porch.
Ooooooh.
Egg is so mean!
Madison: The flowers are from my dad.
Egg: Duh. Who else would send you flowers?
Surprise! Josh comes over. Madison spazzes out.
Hart tries to engage Madison in conversation, but she's like, "Uh-huh, yeah. So, Josh...."
Then she asks him [Hart] all these questions about Josh. Way to be heartless, Maddie.
Surprise! Madison's hair is a mess and her T-shirt is stained. Mwahaha. Murphy's law.
Gramma turns out to be a Betty. Who dated OLDER BOYS!!
Fran apparently dated every boy in Far Hills.
OMG, GRAMMA DATED SOMEONE FOUR AND A HALF YEARS OLDER THAN HER!! AT 16!!!
That's like me dating my brother. Only we're not related, but it's still semi-illegal, were we to have sex, but we wouldn't, but people would assume he's a pervert anyway, which he probably IS.
Mmm, this older gentlemen was named Charlie Francis. Helen liked the way he wore his ties. Euphemism for something else?
He asked her out when he was 20 and she was SIXTEEN!!!!
They also talk about Mackie, the butcher's son, and Gabriel, a boy in the church choir.
Whoas. They sound dreamy.
Madison thinks she might not like Hart as much!!
Her friends are like, "You can't forget Hart!! Btw, my brother knows Josh, want me to hook you up?"
Gramma wants Madison to go to bed at 8:30.
What? She's not 6!
Now Bigwheels is sick.
She wants to know what happened to Hart, too.
"What had happened to Hart? And what was Madison going to do about her change of heart?"
Mr. Danehy suggests Madison catch up on her science homework with the help of HART JONES.
Coincidence? Or not?
But she forgets about that when Josh comes over and talks to her!!!
Josh: Well...I have class.
Madison: See you through the window!!
Oh, Madison. You have no idea how NERDY that sounded.
Argh!!!! Hart's like, "Madison, can we talk?" and he leaves an empty seat next to him at lunch and EVERYTHING, and Madison's just like, "Whatever."
AAAAARGH!
Lindsay's like, "Let's send Fiona and Aimee an e-mail full of gossip!! Let's tell them about Josh! That's juicy!"
Excuse me, but how??? He's just a cute guy who talked to Madison once, and only to be polite.
M. C. Escher!!
"Tuesday afternoon, after turning in to Blueberry Steet on the walk home from school, Madison spotted Josh. He was way ahead of her, but Madison didn't think. She just started running.
'Hello!' Madison gasped when she caught up to him.
Josh whirled around. 'Whoa. Hello, yourself. I didn't hear you.'
Madison tried to keep from panting, but her mouth was dry from running so fast. She wiped her forehead and tried to look cool.
'Are you okay?' Josh asked. 'You're purple.'
'Oh, I have asthma,' Madison said. It was a strange lie, but it sounded a lot better than, 'Oh, I was just running to catch up to you.'"
OMG!!!! That's so hilarious!! "Oh, I have asthma!"
Josh has a pet poodle named Cuddles. Um...
Gramma Helen is confusing. First, she's like, "Fran, don't ditch your kid!" Then she's like, "Madison, you must understand your mom has a lot on her plate."
They watch Fran's new documentary, which is about AIDs. Gramma even starts crying.
Group hug!
Madison goes out to talk to Josh, and misinterprets all of his actions as, "He thinks I'm cute. He's speechless because I'm so beautiful."
BATTING YOUR EYES DOESN'T WORK.
Josh totally ditches her and is like, "Um, that's nice, I have to help my dad."
I REALLY don't think he likes you, Maddie.
Oh no!! She tries to window-chat with him, and he just goes to bed without answering.
Definitely a bad sign.
Madison tries to make pancakes. "I can't do this!!"
Sorry. Just struck me as funny.
OH NO!!! Hart tries to talk to Maddie and she's like, "Uh-huh. Uh-huh. What are you talking about?"
AAAGH!!1 MADISON FINN!!! DID YOU EVER LEARN SOCIAL SKILLS??
Lindsay: He is cute. I think you would make a nice couple.
Madison: Jeez, Lindsay! Why don't you just announce it over the loudspeaker?
Lol!!
Whatever. Aimee berates Maddie for liking someone who is "practically in high school."
You like someone who is "practically in Mensa", so shut up.
Madison reads an article entitled, "Two's Company, but three's a crowd: How do you choose when you like two?"
But she never gets to finish it, so she still can't decide.
"I think maybe it's a good idea if you're going out with that older guy. Guys our age can be such dorks."
Gusy in GENERAL can be dorks.
Madison sees Josh at Freeze Palace.
"Madison wanted to turn three shades of purple.
I'm with my dad.
It sounded so seventh grade."
Whoa, Madison and Josh have the same favorite ice cream flavor!
Too bad Josh has a girlfriend! Surprise! Her name is Remy...and he had his hand on THE SMALL OF HER BACK. You know what that means.
Madison runs out of the shop and cries the whole way home.
Bigwheels is going out with Reggie again AND her cat is having kittens.
Life is so unfair.
It doesn't seem like such a big deal, but Madison is totally heartbroken. It's really sad.
And she totally saw it coming, anyway.
Aimee is such a horrible friend.
"So that's it? That's the end of Josh? I was getting excited about the prospect of your dating some ninth grader. And then maybe you'd introduce me to some other ninth grader..."
How shallow.
Madison totally blew the Josh thing out of proportion.
HART CALLS!
Madison: What are you guys doing for your Web page project?
Hart: The Titanic.
Madison: That's deep.
Hart: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *more hysterical laughter*
Hart then proceeds to tell her how annoying Ivy is and how she's failing science.
JEEEEEERK.
OMG! He asks her out! Say no! Say yes!
She says yes.
Now they're going to the movies...as a couple...on Saturday!!!
Hart was worth the wait.
Whatever that means.
Madison's Computer Tip:
Use e-mail to keep in touch with friends and family when you're stuck at home.
Wise words.
I'm definitely DONE with the computer for now, so I'm going to chillax!!! (Nickolodeon word!) and read a while. Maybe I'll post on Monday.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Somebody's getting married! Part #1
Our first Madison Finn Super Special! And this one truly is SUPER special: it's more than 300 pages, which is 3 TIMES as long as the average Pony Pals Super Special.
Beat that, Jeanne Betancourt.
Plot: Well, you knew it was coming. Madison's dad (Jeff) and his girlfriend Stephanie are getting married!!! In two weeks!!! In Texas!!! And they want Madison to be the junior bridesmaid!!!
Can I get a, "Yeee-haaw,"?
Madison has a whole BUNCH of conflicting emotions.
Stephanie not only wants her to be a bridesmaid and wear a TON of fancy clothes to all the parties her mother has planned, but wants her also to read one of Shakespeare's sonnets.
Hm. I wonder if it was one of the procreation sonnets.
No, really, I do.
But seriously. Madison? Stuttering stage-fright run-from-conflict Madison? You want HER to read a sonnet at your WEDDING?
Whatever. Your funeral.
Madison is SCAREDER THAN SCARED!!
So far, she's just arrived in Texas, and her suitcase is somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin!!! With no dress, no laptop, and no wedding gift in sight (she's trying to write a poem with no luck), what will our heroine do????
You'll find out later.
Most of this novel is actually just filler. She doesn't leave for Texas until page...90 or so.
To be continued...
More notes:
Before you tell your kids some big news, it's always good to SUCK UP to them and be REALLY obvious that something's on your mind.
They're getting married in two weeks???
To cope, Madison orders three pieces of chocolate cake.
That's my girl.
Madison's like, "Why are you marrying Stephanie, you just ditched my mom?"
A year IS pretty soon, I guess. Because, in Madison Finnland, time stopped right before 7th grade started, so it's always a year since the Big-D.
Which is weird, because if that's true, he met Stephanie like RIGHT AFTER the divorce, if they've been dating a while.
Sorry. Concrete random.
Stephanie almost got married once...but called it off. UH OH.
Yeah, Frannie (Madison's mom) knew, and she decided not to say anything?
And she's totally fine with the whole thing?
Hello, you were once MARRIED to this man! You once had SEX with this man! You have a DAUGHTER with this man?
Doesn't it bother you?
She is a little bothered by the two week notice.
Madison, like Anna Harley, RESISTS CHANGE.
The wedding invitation says, "Regrets Only."
Uh oh.
Madison has some regrets she'd like to share with the class.
Madison: At the end of the invite there's this line "regrets only" and I wanted to call him up and shout I HAVE REGRETS, DAD! DON'T DO IT!!!
Didn't Bigwheels get another kitten in the last book? Madison's just NOW addressing this?
Whaaat? Bigwheels spent all of #11 claiming she was in love with Reggie.
LIES!
What's wrong with dressing casual?
In Laurenland, it's casual Friday EVERY day!
How are Egg and Fiona still only "sort of" going out? Didn't he ask her out on a REAL DATE, where they HELD HANDS at the MOVIES? That's pretty serious.
Hehehe. He calls her "Fee" and she calls him "Walter".
Drew: *little rich boy* Cool, huh? *points to a row of golden torches* Mom got them shipped here from Samoa or something.
Aimee: Come on! You can get those at the home decorating store in downtown Far Hills for five bucks!
Drew: Really? Well, they're cool, anyhow.
Drew has a GIRLFRIEND.
I KNOW!!!
This is Stalker Drew who followed Maddie everywhere and asked her to the Heart to Heart Dance!!
I know he had to get over it sometime, but still, this is quite a blow.
I've been in a similar situation.
Maddie's all, "Wtf, I thought you liked me!"
Heheh, junior high girls.
"Look, over there! I think that's Ben! Over by the torch! *runs away*"
Hehe. I had a friend be like, "Omg, So-and-so complimented me! But I only like him a little bit."
....
Fiona, you hypocrite.
"I can't believe she acts that way around him."
Um...ahem? You and EGG?
Awkward. Madison has to go to dinner with Dad and Stephanie.
And it seems they REALLY want to be alone.
Everyone's crying and getting sappy.
Ooookaaay.
HA!
Stephanie: Maddie, in addition to the poem, I wanted to ask you if you would...oh...How do I say this? Jeff, help me out here.
Dad: What Stephanie is trying to say, Maddie, is will you stand up for her at the wedding?
Madison: I know, I just said I would stand up for her. I'll read the poem. I assumed that I would be standing up to do it...
HAHAHAHA! Oh, Madison, you crack me up.
Actually, I didn't know what "stand up for me" meant, either.
Basically, she wants her to be the junior maid of honor.
There are hundreds of Wolfes (Stephanie's family) coming...and 2 Finns (Jeff's family).
Stephanie's color scheme is "pale colors".
Sweet, I could just go naked.
Aw wait, I tanned a little.
Dad: Hey, Maddie, when you get the dress, just don't pick out some super short outfit with lots of Big Bird feathers.
Maddie: Okay, Dad. I guess I'll return the yellow boa and my leather miniskirt.
Mom: You can pick out whatever color dress you like, as long as it's a pale color. That was all she asked.
[Hey, at least she's letting you pick out your own dress, rather than picking a really ugly one for you.]
Madison: Pale? But I look ucky in pale colors. I'm pale!
Same here, Maddie.
Her friends still haven't guessed about Hart!!!
Madison's First Draft of the Wedding Poem
Your wedding is a special (ACK!!) day
And you will be feeling good in every way
The sun is shining bright on your FACES
And there is no one who can take your places
(No one?)
Thank u for making me a part of the day (change this word)
OH I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY!!!!!
It could use some work.
Madison finds the perfect dress...and it's ORANGE, her favorite color.
And she runs into Elaine, Drew's new girlfriend, at the mall.
UH OH.
Elaine's really nice and oblivious to bragging.
She's on her way to meet Drew in the library in 15 minutes.
Madison wonders if they'll be doing something other than checking out books...
Such as checking out each other...
Who knows, maybe they'll even do a little studying...
And Drew will teach her a little French...
Hahaha, libraries are so useful for analogies.
Bigwheels is always:
A. sick
B. grounded
C. unable to go online because her computer crashed
Then she goes on to describe
A. her little brother and sister
B. her fight with her best friend
C. Reggie
D. her new pet
E. her new computer (whenever her computer crashes, SHE GETS A NEW ONE!!!)
Ooh, Bigwheels met a cute guy named Tommy. He has a billion freckles. Sounds...hot.
Dun dun dun!! The first mention of bras in a Madison Finn book!
Uh oh. Stephanie casually mentions that there will be few fancy parties, so Madison needs some more dressy outfits.
So Madison starts cleaning out her closet...Eminem-style.
Fiona loans her a dress.
Isn't Fiona like a foot taller, though?
Oh well. If it's a sundress, she could wear it as a sheath dress or something.
Ew, Fiona and Madison get in a WAY sappy discussion about love, and whether or not they'll ever fall in love and get MARRIED. Fiona wonders if Egg will ever pop the question.
Ha, yeah. If Egg ever decides to COMMIT.
Awkward conversation with Hart.
Bad. Or good?
But you're making him nervous.
Good? Or bad?
"Totally free! Thanks, Mr. G."
Chet made a poem!!
Uh oh. Aimee and Fiona saw Madison talking to Hart, and she was SO flirting with him just now.
We've passed page 90, and Madison STILL hasn't left for Texas.
"'Have a good trip, Finnster,' Hart said with a wave of his hand.
'I will,' Madison said, unable to take his eyes off Hart's tousled hair. For a split second, she had an overwhelming urge to throw her arms around him and give him a hug."
RESIST THE URGE, MADDIE! RESIST THE URGE!
Page 100: She just got on the plane.
Fiona and Aimee write her a really long letter, in which they accuse her of liking Drew.
Stephanie's Texas accent comes creeping back into her voice.
Like my dad, whenever he goes back home, he gets a really thick Southern accent.
Actually, that happens every time he talks on the phone with his parents.
Madison lost her suitcase.
Oh.
No.
Now she can't change clothes.
OR check her e-mail.
Madison gets her own hotel room!!! And it's really nice!!!
Stephanie and Dad get a room to themselves.
Uh oh.
Implying they're sexually active.
That's not something I'd want to know about my dad and his partner.
If my dad were to start dating another woman if my mom died in a tragic boating accident or something.
TV! Sofa! Minifridge!!! Pretty sweet hotel room, right?
Like the suite my grandparents got us for their anniversary??
Ooooh yeaaaah.
Lame. Egg asked Fiona to the movies...
...and then ditched her.
Well, he called her and told her he couldn't make it, which is different than being stood up, but still.
That's mean.
So we'll pick up where we left off next time.
Just remember that Stephanie and Dad are getting married in Texas.
Egg is a jerk.
And Madison has no clothes on!!!
To be continued....
Beat that, Jeanne Betancourt.
Plot: Well, you knew it was coming. Madison's dad (Jeff) and his girlfriend Stephanie are getting married!!! In two weeks!!! In Texas!!! And they want Madison to be the junior bridesmaid!!!
Can I get a, "Yeee-haaw,"?
Madison has a whole BUNCH of conflicting emotions.
Stephanie not only wants her to be a bridesmaid and wear a TON of fancy clothes to all the parties her mother has planned, but wants her also to read one of Shakespeare's sonnets.
Hm. I wonder if it was one of the procreation sonnets.
No, really, I do.
But seriously. Madison? Stuttering stage-fright run-from-conflict Madison? You want HER to read a sonnet at your WEDDING?
Whatever. Your funeral.
Madison is SCAREDER THAN SCARED!!
So far, she's just arrived in Texas, and her suitcase is somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin!!! With no dress, no laptop, and no wedding gift in sight (she's trying to write a poem with no luck), what will our heroine do????
You'll find out later.
Most of this novel is actually just filler. She doesn't leave for Texas until page...90 or so.
To be continued...
More notes:
Before you tell your kids some big news, it's always good to SUCK UP to them and be REALLY obvious that something's on your mind.
They're getting married in two weeks???
To cope, Madison orders three pieces of chocolate cake.
That's my girl.
Madison's like, "Why are you marrying Stephanie, you just ditched my mom?"
A year IS pretty soon, I guess. Because, in Madison Finnland, time stopped right before 7th grade started, so it's always a year since the Big-D.
Which is weird, because if that's true, he met Stephanie like RIGHT AFTER the divorce, if they've been dating a while.
Sorry. Concrete random.
Stephanie almost got married once...but called it off. UH OH.
Yeah, Frannie (Madison's mom) knew, and she decided not to say anything?
And she's totally fine with the whole thing?
Hello, you were once MARRIED to this man! You once had SEX with this man! You have a DAUGHTER with this man?
Doesn't it bother you?
She is a little bothered by the two week notice.
Madison, like Anna Harley, RESISTS CHANGE.
The wedding invitation says, "Regrets Only."
Uh oh.
Madison has some regrets she'd like to share with the class.
Madison: At the end of the invite there's this line "regrets only" and I wanted to call him up and shout I HAVE REGRETS, DAD! DON'T DO IT!!!
Didn't Bigwheels get another kitten in the last book? Madison's just NOW addressing this?
Whaaat? Bigwheels spent all of #11 claiming she was in love with Reggie.
LIES!
What's wrong with dressing casual?
In Laurenland, it's casual Friday EVERY day!
How are Egg and Fiona still only "sort of" going out? Didn't he ask her out on a REAL DATE, where they HELD HANDS at the MOVIES? That's pretty serious.
Hehehe. He calls her "Fee" and she calls him "Walter".
Drew: *little rich boy* Cool, huh? *points to a row of golden torches* Mom got them shipped here from Samoa or something.
Aimee: Come on! You can get those at the home decorating store in downtown Far Hills for five bucks!
Drew: Really? Well, they're cool, anyhow.
Drew has a GIRLFRIEND.
I KNOW!!!
This is Stalker Drew who followed Maddie everywhere and asked her to the Heart to Heart Dance!!
I know he had to get over it sometime, but still, this is quite a blow.
I've been in a similar situation.
Maddie's all, "Wtf, I thought you liked me!"
Heheh, junior high girls.
"Look, over there! I think that's Ben! Over by the torch! *runs away*"
Hehe. I had a friend be like, "Omg, So-and-so complimented me! But I only like him a little bit."
....
Fiona, you hypocrite.
"I can't believe she acts that way around him."
Um...ahem? You and EGG?
Awkward. Madison has to go to dinner with Dad and Stephanie.
And it seems they REALLY want to be alone.
Everyone's crying and getting sappy.
Ooookaaay.
HA!
Stephanie: Maddie, in addition to the poem, I wanted to ask you if you would...oh...How do I say this? Jeff, help me out here.
Dad: What Stephanie is trying to say, Maddie, is will you stand up for her at the wedding?
Madison: I know, I just said I would stand up for her. I'll read the poem. I assumed that I would be standing up to do it...
HAHAHAHA! Oh, Madison, you crack me up.
Actually, I didn't know what "stand up for me" meant, either.
Basically, she wants her to be the junior maid of honor.
There are hundreds of Wolfes (Stephanie's family) coming...and 2 Finns (Jeff's family).
Stephanie's color scheme is "pale colors".
Sweet, I could just go naked.
Aw wait, I tanned a little.
Dad: Hey, Maddie, when you get the dress, just don't pick out some super short outfit with lots of Big Bird feathers.
Maddie: Okay, Dad. I guess I'll return the yellow boa and my leather miniskirt.
Mom: You can pick out whatever color dress you like, as long as it's a pale color. That was all she asked.
[Hey, at least she's letting you pick out your own dress, rather than picking a really ugly one for you.]
Madison: Pale? But I look ucky in pale colors. I'm pale!
Same here, Maddie.
Her friends still haven't guessed about Hart!!!
Madison's First Draft of the Wedding Poem
Your wedding is a special (ACK!!) day
And you will be feeling good in every way
The sun is shining bright on your FACES
And there is no one who can take your places
(No one?)
Thank u for making me a part of the day (change this word)
OH I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY!!!!!
It could use some work.
Madison finds the perfect dress...and it's ORANGE, her favorite color.
And she runs into Elaine, Drew's new girlfriend, at the mall.
UH OH.
Elaine's really nice and oblivious to bragging.
She's on her way to meet Drew in the library in 15 minutes.
Madison wonders if they'll be doing something other than checking out books...
Such as checking out each other...
Who knows, maybe they'll even do a little studying...
And Drew will teach her a little French...
Hahaha, libraries are so useful for analogies.
Bigwheels is always:
A. sick
B. grounded
C. unable to go online because her computer crashed
Then she goes on to describe
A. her little brother and sister
B. her fight with her best friend
C. Reggie
D. her new pet
E. her new computer (whenever her computer crashes, SHE GETS A NEW ONE!!!)
Ooh, Bigwheels met a cute guy named Tommy. He has a billion freckles. Sounds...hot.
Dun dun dun!! The first mention of bras in a Madison Finn book!
Uh oh. Stephanie casually mentions that there will be few fancy parties, so Madison needs some more dressy outfits.
So Madison starts cleaning out her closet...Eminem-style.
Fiona loans her a dress.
Isn't Fiona like a foot taller, though?
Oh well. If it's a sundress, she could wear it as a sheath dress or something.
Ew, Fiona and Madison get in a WAY sappy discussion about love, and whether or not they'll ever fall in love and get MARRIED. Fiona wonders if Egg will ever pop the question.
Ha, yeah. If Egg ever decides to COMMIT.
Awkward conversation with Hart.
Bad. Or good?
But you're making him nervous.
Good? Or bad?
"Totally free! Thanks, Mr. G."
Chet made a poem!!
Uh oh. Aimee and Fiona saw Madison talking to Hart, and she was SO flirting with him just now.
We've passed page 90, and Madison STILL hasn't left for Texas.
"'Have a good trip, Finnster,' Hart said with a wave of his hand.
'I will,' Madison said, unable to take his eyes off Hart's tousled hair. For a split second, she had an overwhelming urge to throw her arms around him and give him a hug."
RESIST THE URGE, MADDIE! RESIST THE URGE!
Page 100: She just got on the plane.
Fiona and Aimee write her a really long letter, in which they accuse her of liking Drew.
Stephanie's Texas accent comes creeping back into her voice.
Like my dad, whenever he goes back home, he gets a really thick Southern accent.
Actually, that happens every time he talks on the phone with his parents.
Madison lost her suitcase.
Oh.
No.
Now she can't change clothes.
OR check her e-mail.
Madison gets her own hotel room!!! And it's really nice!!!
Stephanie and Dad get a room to themselves.
Uh oh.
Implying they're sexually active.
That's not something I'd want to know about my dad and his partner.
If my dad were to start dating another woman if my mom died in a tragic boating accident or something.
TV! Sofa! Minifridge!!! Pretty sweet hotel room, right?
Like the suite my grandparents got us for their anniversary??
Ooooh yeaaaah.
Lame. Egg asked Fiona to the movies...
...and then ditched her.
Well, he called her and told her he couldn't make it, which is different than being stood up, but still.
That's mean.
So we'll pick up where we left off next time.
Just remember that Stephanie and Dad are getting married in Texas.
Egg is a jerk.
And Madison has no clothes on!!!
To be continued....
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Months of toil now at an end, or Pony Pals Super Special #6: The Last Pony Ride
This is it, guys. The very last Pony Pals book.
Plot: Major changes are going on in Wiggins. Lulu's father wants to her to move to Africa with him! Pam and Anna are getting too big for their ponies!!! What is going on???
First, let's deal with Pam: Pam finds it's getting a tad uncomfortable to ride Lightning. At the same time, Eleanor Whats-her-face has given Pam her horse Starfire after a tragic riding accident, forcing him (not her; she got a new horse) to retire early. Pam is torn between the pony she loves and the horse she longs to care for.
Her mom is totally NOT helping, by hinting that Lightning is a boring old nag that should be sold for glue.
In the end, Pam chooses to keep Starfire and let her mom use Lightning as a school pony, but still take care of her old pony every day.
Good choice.
Now Lulu: Her dad suddenly wants her to move to Africa with him, because he doesn't want to miss her childhood.
Hello???
Then why did you dump her in Wiggins with her grandmother in the FIRST PLACE???
Lulu begs her father to let her stay in Wiggins, with her FRIENDS, and GRANDMA, and PONY, but her dad insists she move to a country (Botwswana) with civil wars so she can make new friends. Because introverts are soooooo good at that.
Lulu has been defeated by her SUCKY FATHER!!! She decides to give Snow White to Anna, because Snow White is the perfect size for her 4'10" friend.
Anna: Basically what was just said about Lulu. She doesn't want her friends to move and change and go through puberty and that, and she doesn't want to give up Acorn. So she asks her parents if she can have TWO ponies (Snow White and Acorn), and Mike Lacey agrees to help her with barn chores so she doesn't get behind in school.
So Anna has two ponies, Lulu has no pony, and Pam has a horse AND a pony.
Not fair.
So Lulu moves to Africa, taking with her a scrapbook of all the Pony Pal's adventures. AWwww.
More notes:
Can I just say I REALLY liked this book? It was sweet.
Except for all the really bad parents.
Isn't Botswana one of the wartorn countries??
Ooh, Lulu got to ride an elephant!! How exotic!
Whatever. I could still ride ponies like Acorn in like 6th grade at 5'4". Anna is 6 inches shorter than that. She needs to suck it up. Just lengthen your stirrups, honey.
Eleanor is such a fake. "Oooh, I miss Starfire! He'll never be able to compete again!"
So she dumps him on a ten-year-old and buys a NEW horse to compete with.
Pam is 5'4", too, and she's too big for Lightning???? Lightning is 14 hands. She should be the perfect height!!
Pam's mom is so annoying. I really, REALLY despise her.
Ugh.
Eleanor: I thought Starfire and I wouldbe a team forever. Now I'm training another horse. I'll walk him around a little. Then I have to go back and ride my new horse. You'll always be my star! *sob*
-_-
Mr. Crandal shaved!!!!!!! He looks Samoan.
Starfire is so named because he has a white STAR marking on his forehead, but that marking is not evident in the illustration.
Ooh, Dr. Crandal's in on it, too.
If your daughter was happy with a pony, why wouldn't you let her be??
And if Pam isn't too big to ride DAISY and SPLASH and train numerous other ponies, she really shouldn't be too big for Lightning!
Mike: Is this something for Lulu?
Anna: Yeah. It's going to say 'Welcome home.' Pam was supposed to write it, but she's not here yet. And Lulu will be here any minute.
Mike: I'll write it for you. I print good.
Yeah, but you don't speak so well.
The writing in this book is definitely more improved than previous books, but Ms. Betancourt still has a tendency to repeat phrases.
Okay, Mr. Sanders wants Lulu to have some permanence in her life, so he's ripping her out of her comfortable life in Wiggins to live with him in Botswana...FOR TWO YEARS. THEN where are they going to move, I wonder?
Oh, it's going to be so great, Lulu! People speak English there, and you can go to school, and your dad bought an apartment for the two of you!
Oh, and you can't bring Snow White.
Pam: Did you tell your dad you didn't want to move to Africa?
Lulu: It seemed like an okay idea when I was there.
Anna: What does your grandmother always want us to do?
Lulu: Be girlie girls.
I'm glad she has such high expectations.
They let Grandma Sandy give them makeovers, then beg her to tell her irresponsible son to let his daughter stay where she pleases.
Grandma: Makeovers! What a lovely idea. I have a great idea for Anna's hair. A shade of pink nail polish would be perfect for girls your age. And there's a new aqua one with sparkles.
Lulu: I bet Pam would like that one.
Hehehe.
SHE STRAIGHTENS ANNA'S HAIR!!
I think Pam is over Lightning. She forgets what gender her pony is.
This sounds like something from a horror movie.
"Lulu's grandmother turned her attention to Lulu. 'Now I am going to give you curls,' she announced cheerfully."
Whoa, pink and silver beads totally don't go with sparkly aqua nail polish.
Moral of this story: Tomboys are better.
Charlie's back in town!! What, he's 12??? I thought he was 14. He's best friends with Mike and Tommy, isn't he??? WHY WOULD THEY HANG OUT WITH A 12-YEAR-OLD??
Uh oh. They go out to dinner at the diner, looking like girls...and see Tommy, Charlie, and Mike.
Recipe for disaster.
Tommy: Look at the Pony Pests. They're trying to be girls.
Jerk. He's probably a homophobe.
Which is weird, cuz he's gay with Mike.
Is it possible to be a gay homophobe?
I guess that's called hypocrisy.
Meow, Lulu looks like Evangeline Lilly.
Grandma: Riding helmets will crush your new hairdos.
Forsake your riding safety, Lulu! I don't care if you die in a riding accident as long as your corpse looks good!
Then she says: Don't worry about it, dear. It's you I love. Not what your hair looks like.
Which is, like, the opposite of what you've been telling her all these years.
Surprise! Starfire is Pam's now.
And her mom still sucks.
Mrs. Crandal totally drops that bomb on her, and then when Pam reacts, is all, "Sorry, I'm busy, we'll discuss this later."
Haaaate.
Anna's in denial. She doesn't realize she's too huge for Acorn (though in the picture all the girls are the same size and look aptly suited to their ponies).
WHOA!!!
Never tell Anna anything, or she might react like this:
"You're going to have a horse! You're giving up Lightning! If you have Starfire, you won't ride her at all. You're disloyal and you're bad Pony Pals. Both of you!!"
*runs away crying*
The Pony Pals decide to let her cool off on her own for a while.
THEY'RE LEARNING! HALLELUJAH!
Oh. Anna admits she's a little psycho. And sad. And resistant to change.
Awwww.
I HATE LULU'S DAD!!!
He's SO SELFISH! If he wants to be with Lulu so badly, why isn't he putting her best interests into the picture??
It's been about his career all this time, and it's STILL about his career.
He claims he doesn't want to miss anymore of her childhood, that she should remain in one place, and that they belong together.
If that's so, MOVE TO WIGGINS TO BE WITH YOUR KID, YOU SELFISH LOSER!!!
He's SUCH a jerk.
And it sucks cuz Lulu probably knows this, but she does love and her dad and wants to live with him.
This is the part of the book that made me really sad. And incensed. But pretty sad, too.
THE MOMENT OF TRUTH:
Tommy: Good riddance. We have too many Pony Pests around here. We need pest control.
Mike: Stop it! Stop being mean. It's not funny.
Tommy: Good riddance to you, too. You're a bigger pest than they are.
Wow. I guess it's really over. Now Mike and Anna can hook up!!
Unless...uh oh....
Mike: He makes me so mad sometimes. He's a lousy friend.
Charlie: *pats him on the back* You can find better guys than him to hang out with. [Read: ME!]
Mike: *smile* I guess.
Awww, so much for Mike + Anna.
That would be the awesomest fanfic ever. An Anna, Mike, and Charlie love triangle.
Lulu thinks up some pretty smart ideas.
Idea #1: She wants to give Snow White to Anna, because Snow White knows Anna and giving her away is easier than selling her.
Idea #2: They can enter the 21st century (yay!) and use e-mail to communicate.
They agree to e-mail every week.
Every WEEK?? Come on. Use IM and talk every DAY.
What's with the idea that hobbies detract from schoolwork? I disagree. There can be a balance, and Anna does have a legitimate learning disability.
Mrs. Harley isn't the nicest mom either.
Anna: Acorn and Snow White shouldn't be seperated. They're best friends. They're stablemates.
Mrs. Harley: Of course they can be separated. Ponies are bought and sold all the time. You can only have one pony. That's more than most kids have. I'm sorry, Anna. You'll have to decide what pony you want.
Harsh!! I can understand the financial burden another pony would bring, but seriously??? Your kid's grades should have NOTHING to do with the decision, lady. And she has to choose? Way mean.
No way!!!
Rosalie wishes she could ride ponies more often.
Anna can't take care of two ponies.
Mike offers to take care of both ponies, in exchange for more riding time for Rosalie.
That's so nice!!!!
Basically, they make Mike do ALL the barn chores.
Whoa, that wasn't in the agreement. Anna should still help out.
Haha, we find out the Pony Pals' middle names.
Mike's middle name is John. Lame.
Charlie's is K. Huh. Like Harry S. Truman.
Pam's is Eleanor (after the famous chick who tossed her injured horse over Pam's way).
Anna's is Marie.
Lulu doesn't have a middle name. That's why she's no longer in the club and has to move to Africa.
"I heard you're moving to AFrica. It's a wonderful oppurtunity for you."
That's Mr. Harley talking. I suppose that's true, but all the same, how inconsiderate.
This girl has to leave most of her family and friends (AND PONY) to a completely different culture where there are wars and dangerous animals and excessive heat.
Not that I have anything against Africa (quite the opposite), but if I was forced to move there, I'd be cutting myself now.
How convenient. Rosalie is the perfect size for Acorn. So, in essence, Acorn is Rosalie's pony now.
Yay, the Harley's agreed!
They say goodbye to almost everyone in Wiggins, and reference quite a few of the past books. This includes:
Ms. McGee (Historical Society Chick); Mike's grandma (after they found her secret letter in the secret spot in #31); Ms. Raskins (the slacker girl in charge of St. Francis Animal Shelter); Eve Greeley and Lucky (the pony they raised from birth); Mr. and Mrs. Quinn (the old people with the old pony); Mimi Klein and Tongo (the bratty girl with her bratty pony); Mr. Olson (creepy old man/Charlie's uncle); and Mr. Remington (the cool, Harry Potter-obsessed librarian).
They throw a going-away party for Lulu, where they serve all her favorite foods: spaghetti and brownies!!!
Aw. Grandma Sandy buys them matching pony necklaces to help them remember the now defunct Pony Pals.
They have a profile in the back of the book on each character and pony.
Lulu is 5 feet, and likes detective work and spaghetti, but not fussing with her hair.
Anna is 4'10" (!!), and likes brownies and drawing, but not school.
Pam is 5'4" (at 10 years old!!!), and likes jumping and being in charge (that's for sure), but not bossy people (ironically enough).
The Happiest Pony Pal Moment:
When Lulu got Snow White and we knew we would be the Pony Pals.
I can think of happier Pony Pal Moments.
Not off the top of my head, but if I tried really hard....
The Saddest Pony Pal Moment:
When we found out that Lulu was moving.
What about when Winston died?
Well, yeah, I guess friend moving FOREVER trumps pony dying FOREVER.
Not even being sarcastic.
Awww. I miss them already.
Seriously, when did I start this blog?? Remember when it was originally JUST Pony Pals?
Well, now there are no more Pony Pals...
...AND I REALLY MISS THEM.
But I do have plenty of Madison Finns to keep you entertained. That should be fun.
Next stop: Madison Finn Super Special #1. Someone's getting married!!!
Plot: Major changes are going on in Wiggins. Lulu's father wants to her to move to Africa with him! Pam and Anna are getting too big for their ponies!!! What is going on???
First, let's deal with Pam: Pam finds it's getting a tad uncomfortable to ride Lightning. At the same time, Eleanor Whats-her-face has given Pam her horse Starfire after a tragic riding accident, forcing him (not her; she got a new horse) to retire early. Pam is torn between the pony she loves and the horse she longs to care for.
Her mom is totally NOT helping, by hinting that Lightning is a boring old nag that should be sold for glue.
In the end, Pam chooses to keep Starfire and let her mom use Lightning as a school pony, but still take care of her old pony every day.
Good choice.
Now Lulu: Her dad suddenly wants her to move to Africa with him, because he doesn't want to miss her childhood.
Hello???
Then why did you dump her in Wiggins with her grandmother in the FIRST PLACE???
Lulu begs her father to let her stay in Wiggins, with her FRIENDS, and GRANDMA, and PONY, but her dad insists she move to a country (Botwswana) with civil wars so she can make new friends. Because introverts are soooooo good at that.
Lulu has been defeated by her SUCKY FATHER!!! She decides to give Snow White to Anna, because Snow White is the perfect size for her 4'10" friend.
Anna: Basically what was just said about Lulu. She doesn't want her friends to move and change and go through puberty and that, and she doesn't want to give up Acorn. So she asks her parents if she can have TWO ponies (Snow White and Acorn), and Mike Lacey agrees to help her with barn chores so she doesn't get behind in school.
So Anna has two ponies, Lulu has no pony, and Pam has a horse AND a pony.
Not fair.
So Lulu moves to Africa, taking with her a scrapbook of all the Pony Pal's adventures. AWwww.
More notes:
Can I just say I REALLY liked this book? It was sweet.
Except for all the really bad parents.
Isn't Botswana one of the wartorn countries??
Ooh, Lulu got to ride an elephant!! How exotic!
Whatever. I could still ride ponies like Acorn in like 6th grade at 5'4". Anna is 6 inches shorter than that. She needs to suck it up. Just lengthen your stirrups, honey.
Eleanor is such a fake. "Oooh, I miss Starfire! He'll never be able to compete again!"
So she dumps him on a ten-year-old and buys a NEW horse to compete with.
Pam is 5'4", too, and she's too big for Lightning???? Lightning is 14 hands. She should be the perfect height!!
Pam's mom is so annoying. I really, REALLY despise her.
Ugh.
Eleanor: I thought Starfire and I wouldbe a team forever. Now I'm training another horse. I'll walk him around a little. Then I have to go back and ride my new horse. You'll always be my star! *sob*
-_-
Mr. Crandal shaved!!!!!!! He looks Samoan.
Starfire is so named because he has a white STAR marking on his forehead, but that marking is not evident in the illustration.
Ooh, Dr. Crandal's in on it, too.
If your daughter was happy with a pony, why wouldn't you let her be??
And if Pam isn't too big to ride DAISY and SPLASH and train numerous other ponies, she really shouldn't be too big for Lightning!
Mike: Is this something for Lulu?
Anna: Yeah. It's going to say 'Welcome home.' Pam was supposed to write it, but she's not here yet. And Lulu will be here any minute.
Mike: I'll write it for you. I print good.
Yeah, but you don't speak so well.
The writing in this book is definitely more improved than previous books, but Ms. Betancourt still has a tendency to repeat phrases.
Okay, Mr. Sanders wants Lulu to have some permanence in her life, so he's ripping her out of her comfortable life in Wiggins to live with him in Botswana...FOR TWO YEARS. THEN where are they going to move, I wonder?
Oh, it's going to be so great, Lulu! People speak English there, and you can go to school, and your dad bought an apartment for the two of you!
Oh, and you can't bring Snow White.
Pam: Did you tell your dad you didn't want to move to Africa?
Lulu: It seemed like an okay idea when I was there.
Anna: What does your grandmother always want us to do?
Lulu: Be girlie girls.
I'm glad she has such high expectations.
They let Grandma Sandy give them makeovers, then beg her to tell her irresponsible son to let his daughter stay where she pleases.
Grandma: Makeovers! What a lovely idea. I have a great idea for Anna's hair. A shade of pink nail polish would be perfect for girls your age. And there's a new aqua one with sparkles.
Lulu: I bet Pam would like that one.
Hehehe.
SHE STRAIGHTENS ANNA'S HAIR!!
I think Pam is over Lightning. She forgets what gender her pony is.
This sounds like something from a horror movie.
"Lulu's grandmother turned her attention to Lulu. 'Now I am going to give you curls,' she announced cheerfully."
Whoa, pink and silver beads totally don't go with sparkly aqua nail polish.
Moral of this story: Tomboys are better.
Charlie's back in town!! What, he's 12??? I thought he was 14. He's best friends with Mike and Tommy, isn't he??? WHY WOULD THEY HANG OUT WITH A 12-YEAR-OLD??
Uh oh. They go out to dinner at the diner, looking like girls...and see Tommy, Charlie, and Mike.
Recipe for disaster.
Tommy: Look at the Pony Pests. They're trying to be girls.
Jerk. He's probably a homophobe.
Which is weird, cuz he's gay with Mike.
Is it possible to be a gay homophobe?
I guess that's called hypocrisy.
Meow, Lulu looks like Evangeline Lilly.
Grandma: Riding helmets will crush your new hairdos.
Forsake your riding safety, Lulu! I don't care if you die in a riding accident as long as your corpse looks good!
Then she says: Don't worry about it, dear. It's you I love. Not what your hair looks like.
Which is, like, the opposite of what you've been telling her all these years.
Surprise! Starfire is Pam's now.
And her mom still sucks.
Mrs. Crandal totally drops that bomb on her, and then when Pam reacts, is all, "Sorry, I'm busy, we'll discuss this later."
Haaaate.
Anna's in denial. She doesn't realize she's too huge for Acorn (though in the picture all the girls are the same size and look aptly suited to their ponies).
WHOA!!!
Never tell Anna anything, or she might react like this:
"You're going to have a horse! You're giving up Lightning! If you have Starfire, you won't ride her at all. You're disloyal and you're bad Pony Pals. Both of you!!"
*runs away crying*
The Pony Pals decide to let her cool off on her own for a while.
THEY'RE LEARNING! HALLELUJAH!
Oh. Anna admits she's a little psycho. And sad. And resistant to change.
Awwww.
I HATE LULU'S DAD!!!
He's SO SELFISH! If he wants to be with Lulu so badly, why isn't he putting her best interests into the picture??
It's been about his career all this time, and it's STILL about his career.
He claims he doesn't want to miss anymore of her childhood, that she should remain in one place, and that they belong together.
If that's so, MOVE TO WIGGINS TO BE WITH YOUR KID, YOU SELFISH LOSER!!!
He's SUCH a jerk.
And it sucks cuz Lulu probably knows this, but she does love and her dad and wants to live with him.
This is the part of the book that made me really sad. And incensed. But pretty sad, too.
THE MOMENT OF TRUTH:
Tommy: Good riddance. We have too many Pony Pests around here. We need pest control.
Mike: Stop it! Stop being mean. It's not funny.
Tommy: Good riddance to you, too. You're a bigger pest than they are.
Wow. I guess it's really over. Now Mike and Anna can hook up!!
Unless...uh oh....
Mike: He makes me so mad sometimes. He's a lousy friend.
Charlie: *pats him on the back* You can find better guys than him to hang out with. [Read: ME!]
Mike: *smile* I guess.
Awww, so much for Mike + Anna.
That would be the awesomest fanfic ever. An Anna, Mike, and Charlie love triangle.
Lulu thinks up some pretty smart ideas.
Idea #1: She wants to give Snow White to Anna, because Snow White knows Anna and giving her away is easier than selling her.
Idea #2: They can enter the 21st century (yay!) and use e-mail to communicate.
They agree to e-mail every week.
Every WEEK?? Come on. Use IM and talk every DAY.
What's with the idea that hobbies detract from schoolwork? I disagree. There can be a balance, and Anna does have a legitimate learning disability.
Mrs. Harley isn't the nicest mom either.
Anna: Acorn and Snow White shouldn't be seperated. They're best friends. They're stablemates.
Mrs. Harley: Of course they can be separated. Ponies are bought and sold all the time. You can only have one pony. That's more than most kids have. I'm sorry, Anna. You'll have to decide what pony you want.
Harsh!! I can understand the financial burden another pony would bring, but seriously??? Your kid's grades should have NOTHING to do with the decision, lady. And she has to choose? Way mean.
No way!!!
Rosalie wishes she could ride ponies more often.
Anna can't take care of two ponies.
Mike offers to take care of both ponies, in exchange for more riding time for Rosalie.
That's so nice!!!!
Basically, they make Mike do ALL the barn chores.
Whoa, that wasn't in the agreement. Anna should still help out.
Haha, we find out the Pony Pals' middle names.
Mike's middle name is John. Lame.
Charlie's is K. Huh. Like Harry S. Truman.
Pam's is Eleanor (after the famous chick who tossed her injured horse over Pam's way).
Anna's is Marie.
Lulu doesn't have a middle name. That's why she's no longer in the club and has to move to Africa.
"I heard you're moving to AFrica. It's a wonderful oppurtunity for you."
That's Mr. Harley talking. I suppose that's true, but all the same, how inconsiderate.
This girl has to leave most of her family and friends (AND PONY) to a completely different culture where there are wars and dangerous animals and excessive heat.
Not that I have anything against Africa (quite the opposite), but if I was forced to move there, I'd be cutting myself now.
How convenient. Rosalie is the perfect size for Acorn. So, in essence, Acorn is Rosalie's pony now.
Yay, the Harley's agreed!
They say goodbye to almost everyone in Wiggins, and reference quite a few of the past books. This includes:
Ms. McGee (Historical Society Chick); Mike's grandma (after they found her secret letter in the secret spot in #31); Ms. Raskins (the slacker girl in charge of St. Francis Animal Shelter); Eve Greeley and Lucky (the pony they raised from birth); Mr. and Mrs. Quinn (the old people with the old pony); Mimi Klein and Tongo (the bratty girl with her bratty pony); Mr. Olson (creepy old man/Charlie's uncle); and Mr. Remington (the cool, Harry Potter-obsessed librarian).
They throw a going-away party for Lulu, where they serve all her favorite foods: spaghetti and brownies!!!
Aw. Grandma Sandy buys them matching pony necklaces to help them remember the now defunct Pony Pals.
They have a profile in the back of the book on each character and pony.
Lulu is 5 feet, and likes detective work and spaghetti, but not fussing with her hair.
Anna is 4'10" (!!), and likes brownies and drawing, but not school.
Pam is 5'4" (at 10 years old!!!), and likes jumping and being in charge (that's for sure), but not bossy people (ironically enough).
The Happiest Pony Pal Moment:
When Lulu got Snow White and we knew we would be the Pony Pals.
I can think of happier Pony Pal Moments.
Not off the top of my head, but if I tried really hard....
The Saddest Pony Pal Moment:
When we found out that Lulu was moving.
What about when Winston died?
Well, yeah, I guess friend moving FOREVER trumps pony dying FOREVER.
Not even being sarcastic.
Awww. I miss them already.
Seriously, when did I start this blog?? Remember when it was originally JUST Pony Pals?
Well, now there are no more Pony Pals...
...AND I REALLY MISS THEM.
But I do have plenty of Madison Finns to keep you entertained. That should be fun.
Next stop: Madison Finn Super Special #1. Someone's getting married!!!
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Way to give away the end, or FTFO Madison Finn #15: Off the Wall
Don't you hate it when the library has every book in a series...
...except the one you need???
I'm trying to find a stupid picture of this book, and my library site, of course, doesn't have this one.
You know what sucks? I ordered a BUNCH of Madison Finns that I've never read, and I'm not going to be able to read them, because I'm trying to do this in series order!!! Aaargh!
Plot: Something is very, very wrong in Far Hills. Madison's favorite teacher, Mrs. Wing, has gone missing!!! She and her husband have just up and left, without leaving a note or anything!
Madison is worrieder than worried.
If that wasn't enough, Aimee's dog Blossom is about to have puppies...with another bassett hound! See, Madison and Aimee made a pact in fourth grade that had something to do with Phin and Blossom having puppies together. It appears Aimee has broken the pact!!
To get her mind off things, Madison checks out a web Egg reccomended to her called "The Wall". The Wall is full of juicy gossip, AKA heaven for 7th grade girls.
Oh no! Someone starts posting nasty things about Madison's friends...and it looks like Madison is to blame! Will Fiona, Aimee, and Lindsay ever talk to her again?
After a little bit of digging, Madison finds out the culprit is none other than Ivy herself (saw it coming).
To get back at the fiend, she writes a very nasty message about Ivy and posts it on The Wall.
Afterwards, she is racked with guilt and tells her parents everything.
They help her take down the message...and then ground her and take away her computer for a month.
OUCH.
Fiona, Aimee, and Lindsay apologize to Madison for not believing her, and everything is rosy once more.
Oh yeah, Madison forgets about the puppies, and Mrs. Wing, it turns out, left to adopt a baby!! Yay!! Sunshine and flowers!!
More notes:
Why are school computers always so slow?
Lance has a crush on Madison, but she is repulsed by his nose-picking and cheerful, "Howdy"s.
The new computer substitute is cool, lol.
"Holy cow! It took me a century to find you cats."
Mrs. Wing leaves Madison in charge...because she's the class expert.
How embarrassingly flattering.
Egg: Get out of here. I would whomp you.
"Whomp" you?? Wth?? Who says that?
Madison and Aimee "enjoy" watching Fiona and Chet's fights.
Enjoy??? What's to enjoy? Those are so awkward!
There is no way boys gossip more than girls.
But they do gossip quite a bit.
Egg sings The Wall's praises, because there aren't any moderators.
RED FLAG! RED FLAG!
There are a buttload of rules that nobody's going to follow WITHOUT MODERATORS.
Aimee IMs Maddie to tell her about the puppies.
But when they get to the part about there being a dad OTHER than Phin, Madison just signs off.
That's always nice.
Madison is such a drama queen! "My best friend has betrayed me."
They're just puppies! And it's not like you shook on the whole puppy plan.
Yeah, the whole "puppy plan" consisted of a bunch of jokes on how ugly Blossom and Phin's puppies would be.
SHE EVEN ADMITS IT! "It was like a dream of mine. I know we didn't make a formal pact or anything, but isn't a friend's word supposed to count for something?"
Dude, I looked these kinds of puppies up online, and they're adorable!!! Just go online and look up "Bassugg puppies".
Dan: Maddie! I'm so glad you're here. I could use your help big-time.
Madison: I'm glad you're here, too. It's been a bad day. I need cheering up.
Dan: Try cleaning up dog poop and cat poop. That'll cheer you up real fast.
Oh, Dan, you charmer you.
THe conversation takes an awkward turn when Madison mentions "those naked-looking cats".
Dan: *giggle* Naked?
Madison: *blush of death* So, um, about my problems....
Dan thinks Madison should chill out and not be so mad at Aimee.
He also thinks Dr. Wing and Mrs. Wing ran away together, but hey.
Madison's Dad wants to go out to dinner with Stephanie's nephew Kirk.
Madison thinks Kirk will probably be a dork.
And, of course, he's no Hart Jones.
Madison's Excuses for not dining with Kirk:
I have the walk the dog.
I have to wash my hair.
I have to save the world from an alien attack.
This probably spoils everything, but Kirk, in later books, turns out to be a way cute Kountry Gentleman.
Poor, poor Madison.
Yay, "Number the Stars"! That's one of my favorite books!!
Ivy is so evil!!
Ivy: I don't see what the big deal is. I mean, I didn't really fail the test. I only got a D, you know. Mr. Danehy is such a pain.
Joan: Science is so dumb anyway.
Ivy: And if that stupid twit Madison had just sat differently, I could have cheated off her paper, anyhow. She's such a goody-goody.
Joan: You'll pass science.
Ivy: Who really cares? I can always copy Madison's lab notes anyway. I do it all the time when she isn't looking.
Mrs. Wing adopted a baby...and Madison was the last one to know.
Been there, done that.
Meaning I've been the last to know. No, I haven't adopted a baby recently. The last baby I met yelled, "Poop," at me and threatened to beat me up if I spoke again.
Someone who goes to FHJH writes a post about Mrs. Wing on the wall. Maddie is like, "Nooo, everyone knew before me!!"
Someone replies to the post: So what, who cares?
Yeah, really, who cares? My teachers get pregnant all the time.
Aimee and Fiona are so stupid!!! They both post on a board called "Hotties" using their REAL SCREENNAMES!!! Now everyone will know it's them!
Posted by: BalletGrl
Date: 5 Nov
Message: actually I like this guy Ben but no one really knows so shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I should not have written that
Why would you write it if you didn't want anyone to know???
Posted by: Wetwinz
Date: 5 Nov
Message: of course someone who has been flirting w/me a lot wink wink can u guess who? *G*
Aimee sees the humor in the puppy situation.
Aimee: Maddie! I told you that about the puppies when we were in, like, fourth grade! And besides, my mom and dad are the ones who decide who Blossom will have puppies with, not me. And they want basset hounds, not some mix of pug and...Maddie, can you imagine what Blossom and Phin's babies would really look like?
Uh, yeah...they would be SOOO CUTE!
Fiona: By the way, I heard some big news.
Madison: Yeah, yeah, big news, I know. Mrs. Wing had a baby.
Fiona: Huh? What are you talking about? A baby? She did?
Madison: Wait. You didn't know?
Fiona: MRS. WING HAD A BABY? Oh, wow! This is, like, HUGE news. My news is so little and puny compared to yours. I just found out that the soccer team is moving their practice space. Wow! How did you find about Mrs. Wing?
So it turns out Madison isn't the last one to know, but come on, Fiona!! The soccer team is moving their practice space??? WHAT KIND OF NEWS IS THAT???
Oooh, lucky. Madison's school has free period instead of study hall.
Someone posts a REALLY mean message about Lindsay!!
Posted by: LoVeBuG
Date: Nov 6
Message: there is ms. fatty in my class and she is SOOOO fat that she cant even go 2 regular camp LOL she has to go to FAT CAMP and she walks around with a dumb black haircut & purple backpack that looks like she should be in the first grade LOSER!!! I feel bad 4 her yah right NOT FHJH would be better w/o her :)
That's pretty mean, but I thought Lindsay had light brown hair. She even has some on the cover.
Lindsay now wants all of her friends to stop going on the site.
It may be disloyal, but...
...I'd probably keep going on The Wall if I were Madison.
Which she does.
Lindsay: I bet it was the guys. I know they make fun of me because I'm overweight. I heard them once.
Madison: You did?
Lindsay: Yeah. I heard Hart and Chet talking once about who was the prettiest in our class.
Madison: Hart and Chet?
Fiona: What did they say, exactly? My brother is such a geek. Don't listen to him!
Lindsay: I don't remember everyone they were talking about, but I do know they said Ivy was the hottest girl and that some other girls were okay but some were too fat, like me and Beth Sanders.
[!!!!!!!!!!! THAT IS SO MEAN!!! Proof that guys suck.]
Fiona: Well, Lindsay. Beth Sanders is fat. She's huge. She takes up two seats at lunch. You're not fat like that.
[I lied, girls suck, too. ESPECIALLY FIONA.]
Madison: That's not the point, guys.
Thank you, Madison.
Lol.
"Madison knew the truth. They would all huff and puff and complain about how terrible it was to post gossip. And then they'd each go home that very night and check the next postings on the gossip page - just in case something interesting came up."
Some people just suck at math. Video games have nothing to do with that.
Madison's Dad reads the Lindsay post outloud, and it sounds kind of funny when he says it.
"What does that text say? 'Fat camp'? 'Looks like she should be in the first grade LOSER'? What is this? This isn't an e-mail from one of your friends, is it?"
Dad thinks girls are meaner than boys.
So true.
Fiona has big news!!!
Fiona: Okay, so he finally, really asked me.
Madison: Asked you? What? Who?"
Fiona: Egg! He asked me out. For real.
Madison: He asked you out? He said those exact words.
Fiona: He wants to go to the movies next week. Can you believe it? I know we're sort of a 'couple', but this really makes a difference
AARGH, NO!! You're not officially a "couple" until he asks you out.
Otherwise, he's just playing you.
I can't believe it's been this long and he JUST NOW asked her out.
Egg's a playa....
Whoa, Madison stands up to Ivy in this one! And it's really funny!
Madison: You obviously don't know the meaning of the word homework, Ivy. It means you actually have to do work, at home.
Ivy: Well, YOU obviously don't understand what it means to be partners, Madison. It means that occasionally you show me your notes. I would do the exact same for you.
Madison: Yeah. If you ever took notes.
Ivy: Excuse me?
Madison: Look, Ivy, I have to go. Why don't you just ask Mr. Danehy for help?
PWNED!!
Why is Fiona so overdramatic??
Fiona: Maddie, I can't believe you!
Madison: What happened?
Fiona: You promised you wouldn't tell!!
Madison: Fiona...
Fiona: I thought you were my friend. How could you?
Madison: Please tell me what's wrong.
Fiona: Why don't you read The Wall? You'll see what I'm talking about, Maddie. You'll see.
Posted by: MF13
Date: 8 Nov
Message: some secrets r way 2 hard 2 keep even about my friends F.W. sez its all god but she and W.D. probably want to hook up @ the movies next week I know it what a j-o-k-e they are so NOT innocent :)
:O Okay, "Madison" basically called Fiona a slut, but Fiona seems more mad that "Madison" told her secret.
Yeah, you should keep your friends' secrets, but what's secret about being asked out?? Wouldn't you be happy? Wouldn't you WANT to share the news with everyone? I mean, you're already "a couple", right???
So, even though I know Madison didn't write this, she shouldn't have told the secret, but WHY WAS IT A SECRET IN THE FIRST PLACE?
Um, duh. Egg told everyone. Big surprise.
Madison thinks it might be Chet, then feels bad and insists they shouldn't do anything.
Why would Chet do that...AND use Madison's scrnnme? Confused.
Madison wants to know if Dan ever made up a fake screenname for himself.
Who hasn't?? No offense, Maddie, but MadFinn kind of sucks.
Aimee has a secret, too! She might get a lead in the next ballet production!
$100 it'll be on The Wall tomorrow.
Madison's gym shorts are sort of tight and Ivy makes fun of them.
I thought tight things were in?? Ivy's just jealous.
Hehehe, Madison gets paired up with Ivy for volleyball.
Ivy: I despise volleyball.
That makes two of us.
Madison: You just despise everything and everyone.
Heheheheheh.
Madison finds a bulletin about Aimee on the wall...supposedly posted by herself. Instead of calling Aimee about it, she retreats to her files to be emo???
Whatever. Aimee will be calling to yell at you in like 2 minutes anyway.
Aimee and Madison have a fight. Aimee drags up stuff from the past, about all the times Madison has lied (she's only lied once). Aimee sort of sucks.
Lol.
As Aimee's leaving, she turns around and screams, "THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING!"
Egg thinks Fiona is stupid for being mad at Madison.
Go Egg!
Ivy gets "gravity" and "relativity" mixed up.
.....
Heh. Ivy and Madison have to do a science project together...and Madison makes Ivy do all the work. Payback.
Ivy: What did you find in the back?
Madison: No much. We should do more research upstairs in the media center, thought. Can you go look after school?
Ivy: Me? Why don't you go look after school.
Madison: I have an after-school conflict today.
Ivy: Well, I have a conflict, too. Like, I don't do science work after school. That's my conflict.
Madison: Maybe we should each write our own paper. I can ask Mr. Danehy if we can split-
Ivy: NO! Okay, I'll look in the media center. Don't throw a hissy about it. Gosh, you always overreact. What a drama queen.
GO MADISON!!
Mr. Danehy gives Ivy an F!!
Today is not Ivy's day.
Ugh, I hate it when people read over my shoulder!!!
Lance is a creepy kid.
Mrs. Wing brings her baby Phoebe to school.
Lance: My cousin had a big, fatso baby. He was so huge, he looked like he was stuffed.
Thanks, Lance.
Boys like babies, too.
It seems like Bigwheels is always either sick or grounded.
"SORRY I wasn't on my computer, but I was SICK and GROUNDED at the SAME TIME."
"Friends are forever, boys are whatever!"
What if all your friends are boys??
Madison wants revenge.
Noooo, don't do it, Madison! Revenge is never the answer!!
Madison writes a post about Ivy.
Posted by: MF13
Date: 11 Nov
Message: More big newz @ FHJH this time its I.D. in trouble wow is she ever. The WITCH is failing science. Yeah I.D. begged Mr. D. to pass her but he said no way so now the school is planning to EXPEL her...it is soooo bad Not only that but I heard that NO other school in the district wants to accept her b/c she has no real friends n e way LOL in fact there r no guys who will even look @ her b/c she dresses
That's as far as she gets before she accidentally publishes it.
Okay, who would even believe that? The part about having no friends and being a slut is pretty mean, but she wouldn't get EXPELLED for failing science.
Duh. Summer school.
Madison has become a pathological liar.
The bulletin won't be removed for 24 hours.
You sort of deserve it, Madison.
Revenge is never the answer.
"Now...Ivy will probably read what I posted and...she'll hate me forever and..."
"Wait just a minute, Maddie. I thought you and Ivy weren't friends anymore anyway."
Yeah!! What do you care what she thinks??
Shouldn't you be more worried about hurting her feelings than how she'll think of you? Because I'm pretty sure she already hates you.
Madison: Why are parents always right? And why am I always wrong?
Trust me, honey. Parents are NOT always right.
Lol, her dad is so delightfully evil.
"You're kidding! Oh, Maddie, you are most definitely going to tell your mother everything, from the beinning. We had a deal."
That's like on "Dan in Real Life".
"So Marty can stay?"
"*hysterical laughter* Marty can STAY???"
Madison can never go on The Wall again.
She is officially Off the Wall (that's where the title comes in).
Wait, MF13 is the one who's not allowed on the wall.
Madison could just create a new screename and go on whenever she wanted.
WtH???????
Lindsay, Aimee, and Fiona came over to apologize.
Why the sudden epiphany??
And why is Lindsay apologizing, too???
Madison had nothing to do with her Fat Camp thing!!! Lindsay probably didn't even know about the whole fight until now.
WHAT IS SHE DOING THERE??
It turns out Ivy told Hart she was MF13, and Hart told Chet who told Fiona.
Boys aren't the only shallow ones.
Such as girl on basketball team??
"Lauren, you'd be really pretty if you did this to your hair."
Um...thanks.
NICE!!! Madison's mom took away her laptop and is keeping it under lock and key in her desk drawer!!! Madison can only use it for one hour each day to check her e-mail!!
Finally! Good parenting!
Madison is super mean to Lance...even if he is a nerd.
Madison: I'm outta here.
Lance: But I just got here.
Madison: So? See you in class tomorrow.
Duh, Lance, you're the reason she's leaving.
Ivy: I'm never going to forget, you know.
Madison: Elephants never forget.
Ivy: Who are you calling.... OOOOOH! You think you're sooooo smart, don't you?
Madison just smiles and walks away.
The one time turning the other cheek actually WORKED.
Bigwheels is grounded because she told some kids a scary story.
Whatever. I bet it was the one about the finger.
Ew, I hate youngest children.
Madison's Computer Tip:
Beware of online gossip.
Truer words were never spoken.
I just read the last 2 Pony Pals books, and they were surprisingly enjoyable and kind of sad. Lulu's dad SUCKS; he's probably the worst father ever. So does Mrs. Crandal. It's like good parents don't EXIST in Wiggins. But that's all tomorrow; I have stuff to do.
...except the one you need???
I'm trying to find a stupid picture of this book, and my library site, of course, doesn't have this one.
You know what sucks? I ordered a BUNCH of Madison Finns that I've never read, and I'm not going to be able to read them, because I'm trying to do this in series order!!! Aaargh!
Plot: Something is very, very wrong in Far Hills. Madison's favorite teacher, Mrs. Wing, has gone missing!!! She and her husband have just up and left, without leaving a note or anything!
Madison is worrieder than worried.
If that wasn't enough, Aimee's dog Blossom is about to have puppies...with another bassett hound! See, Madison and Aimee made a pact in fourth grade that had something to do with Phin and Blossom having puppies together. It appears Aimee has broken the pact!!
To get her mind off things, Madison checks out a web Egg reccomended to her called "The Wall". The Wall is full of juicy gossip, AKA heaven for 7th grade girls.
Oh no! Someone starts posting nasty things about Madison's friends...and it looks like Madison is to blame! Will Fiona, Aimee, and Lindsay ever talk to her again?
After a little bit of digging, Madison finds out the culprit is none other than Ivy herself (saw it coming).
To get back at the fiend, she writes a very nasty message about Ivy and posts it on The Wall.
Afterwards, she is racked with guilt and tells her parents everything.
They help her take down the message...and then ground her and take away her computer for a month.
OUCH.
Fiona, Aimee, and Lindsay apologize to Madison for not believing her, and everything is rosy once more.
Oh yeah, Madison forgets about the puppies, and Mrs. Wing, it turns out, left to adopt a baby!! Yay!! Sunshine and flowers!!
More notes:
Why are school computers always so slow?
Lance has a crush on Madison, but she is repulsed by his nose-picking and cheerful, "Howdy"s.
The new computer substitute is cool, lol.
"Holy cow! It took me a century to find you cats."
Mrs. Wing leaves Madison in charge...because she's the class expert.
How embarrassingly flattering.
Egg: Get out of here. I would whomp you.
"Whomp" you?? Wth?? Who says that?
Madison and Aimee "enjoy" watching Fiona and Chet's fights.
Enjoy??? What's to enjoy? Those are so awkward!
There is no way boys gossip more than girls.
But they do gossip quite a bit.
Egg sings The Wall's praises, because there aren't any moderators.
RED FLAG! RED FLAG!
There are a buttload of rules that nobody's going to follow WITHOUT MODERATORS.
Aimee IMs Maddie to tell her about the puppies.
But when they get to the part about there being a dad OTHER than Phin, Madison just signs off.
That's always nice.
Madison is such a drama queen! "My best friend has betrayed me."
They're just puppies! And it's not like you shook on the whole puppy plan.
Yeah, the whole "puppy plan" consisted of a bunch of jokes on how ugly Blossom and Phin's puppies would be.
SHE EVEN ADMITS IT! "It was like a dream of mine. I know we didn't make a formal pact or anything, but isn't a friend's word supposed to count for something?"
Dude, I looked these kinds of puppies up online, and they're adorable!!! Just go online and look up "Bassugg puppies".
Dan: Maddie! I'm so glad you're here. I could use your help big-time.
Madison: I'm glad you're here, too. It's been a bad day. I need cheering up.
Dan: Try cleaning up dog poop and cat poop. That'll cheer you up real fast.
Oh, Dan, you charmer you.
THe conversation takes an awkward turn when Madison mentions "those naked-looking cats".
Dan: *giggle* Naked?
Madison: *blush of death* So, um, about my problems....
Dan thinks Madison should chill out and not be so mad at Aimee.
He also thinks Dr. Wing and Mrs. Wing ran away together, but hey.
Madison's Dad wants to go out to dinner with Stephanie's nephew Kirk.
Madison thinks Kirk will probably be a dork.
And, of course, he's no Hart Jones.
Madison's Excuses for not dining with Kirk:
I have the walk the dog.
I have to wash my hair.
I have to save the world from an alien attack.
This probably spoils everything, but Kirk, in later books, turns out to be a way cute Kountry Gentleman.
Poor, poor Madison.
Yay, "Number the Stars"! That's one of my favorite books!!
Ivy is so evil!!
Ivy: I don't see what the big deal is. I mean, I didn't really fail the test. I only got a D, you know. Mr. Danehy is such a pain.
Joan: Science is so dumb anyway.
Ivy: And if that stupid twit Madison had just sat differently, I could have cheated off her paper, anyhow. She's such a goody-goody.
Joan: You'll pass science.
Ivy: Who really cares? I can always copy Madison's lab notes anyway. I do it all the time when she isn't looking.
Mrs. Wing adopted a baby...and Madison was the last one to know.
Been there, done that.
Meaning I've been the last to know. No, I haven't adopted a baby recently. The last baby I met yelled, "Poop," at me and threatened to beat me up if I spoke again.
Someone who goes to FHJH writes a post about Mrs. Wing on the wall. Maddie is like, "Nooo, everyone knew before me!!"
Someone replies to the post: So what, who cares?
Yeah, really, who cares? My teachers get pregnant all the time.
Aimee and Fiona are so stupid!!! They both post on a board called "Hotties" using their REAL SCREENNAMES!!! Now everyone will know it's them!
Posted by: BalletGrl
Date: 5 Nov
Message: actually I like this guy Ben but no one really knows so shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I should not have written that
Why would you write it if you didn't want anyone to know???
Posted by: Wetwinz
Date: 5 Nov
Message: of course someone who has been flirting w/me a lot wink wink can u guess who? *G*
Aimee sees the humor in the puppy situation.
Aimee: Maddie! I told you that about the puppies when we were in, like, fourth grade! And besides, my mom and dad are the ones who decide who Blossom will have puppies with, not me. And they want basset hounds, not some mix of pug and...Maddie, can you imagine what Blossom and Phin's babies would really look like?
Uh, yeah...they would be SOOO CUTE!
Fiona: By the way, I heard some big news.
Madison: Yeah, yeah, big news, I know. Mrs. Wing had a baby.
Fiona: Huh? What are you talking about? A baby? She did?
Madison: Wait. You didn't know?
Fiona: MRS. WING HAD A BABY? Oh, wow! This is, like, HUGE news. My news is so little and puny compared to yours. I just found out that the soccer team is moving their practice space. Wow! How did you find about Mrs. Wing?
So it turns out Madison isn't the last one to know, but come on, Fiona!! The soccer team is moving their practice space??? WHAT KIND OF NEWS IS THAT???
Oooh, lucky. Madison's school has free period instead of study hall.
Someone posts a REALLY mean message about Lindsay!!
Posted by: LoVeBuG
Date: Nov 6
Message: there is ms. fatty in my class and she is SOOOO fat that she cant even go 2 regular camp LOL she has to go to FAT CAMP and she walks around with a dumb black haircut & purple backpack that looks like she should be in the first grade LOSER!!! I feel bad 4 her yah right NOT FHJH would be better w/o her :)
That's pretty mean, but I thought Lindsay had light brown hair. She even has some on the cover.
Lindsay now wants all of her friends to stop going on the site.
It may be disloyal, but...
...I'd probably keep going on The Wall if I were Madison.
Which she does.
Lindsay: I bet it was the guys. I know they make fun of me because I'm overweight. I heard them once.
Madison: You did?
Lindsay: Yeah. I heard Hart and Chet talking once about who was the prettiest in our class.
Madison: Hart and Chet?
Fiona: What did they say, exactly? My brother is such a geek. Don't listen to him!
Lindsay: I don't remember everyone they were talking about, but I do know they said Ivy was the hottest girl and that some other girls were okay but some were too fat, like me and Beth Sanders.
[!!!!!!!!!!! THAT IS SO MEAN!!! Proof that guys suck.]
Fiona: Well, Lindsay. Beth Sanders is fat. She's huge. She takes up two seats at lunch. You're not fat like that.
[I lied, girls suck, too. ESPECIALLY FIONA.]
Madison: That's not the point, guys.
Thank you, Madison.
Lol.
"Madison knew the truth. They would all huff and puff and complain about how terrible it was to post gossip. And then they'd each go home that very night and check the next postings on the gossip page - just in case something interesting came up."
Some people just suck at math. Video games have nothing to do with that.
Madison's Dad reads the Lindsay post outloud, and it sounds kind of funny when he says it.
"What does that text say? 'Fat camp'? 'Looks like she should be in the first grade LOSER'? What is this? This isn't an e-mail from one of your friends, is it?"
Dad thinks girls are meaner than boys.
So true.
Fiona has big news!!!
Fiona: Okay, so he finally, really asked me.
Madison: Asked you? What? Who?"
Fiona: Egg! He asked me out. For real.
Madison: He asked you out? He said those exact words.
Fiona: He wants to go to the movies next week. Can you believe it? I know we're sort of a 'couple', but this really makes a difference
AARGH, NO!! You're not officially a "couple" until he asks you out.
Otherwise, he's just playing you.
I can't believe it's been this long and he JUST NOW asked her out.
Egg's a playa....
Whoa, Madison stands up to Ivy in this one! And it's really funny!
Madison: You obviously don't know the meaning of the word homework, Ivy. It means you actually have to do work, at home.
Ivy: Well, YOU obviously don't understand what it means to be partners, Madison. It means that occasionally you show me your notes. I would do the exact same for you.
Madison: Yeah. If you ever took notes.
Ivy: Excuse me?
Madison: Look, Ivy, I have to go. Why don't you just ask Mr. Danehy for help?
PWNED!!
Why is Fiona so overdramatic??
Fiona: Maddie, I can't believe you!
Madison: What happened?
Fiona: You promised you wouldn't tell!!
Madison: Fiona...
Fiona: I thought you were my friend. How could you?
Madison: Please tell me what's wrong.
Fiona: Why don't you read The Wall? You'll see what I'm talking about, Maddie. You'll see.
Posted by: MF13
Date: 8 Nov
Message: some secrets r way 2 hard 2 keep even about my friends F.W. sez its all god but she and W.D. probably want to hook up @ the movies next week I know it what a j-o-k-e they are so NOT innocent :)
:O Okay, "Madison" basically called Fiona a slut, but Fiona seems more mad that "Madison" told her secret.
Yeah, you should keep your friends' secrets, but what's secret about being asked out?? Wouldn't you be happy? Wouldn't you WANT to share the news with everyone? I mean, you're already "a couple", right???
So, even though I know Madison didn't write this, she shouldn't have told the secret, but WHY WAS IT A SECRET IN THE FIRST PLACE?
Um, duh. Egg told everyone. Big surprise.
Madison thinks it might be Chet, then feels bad and insists they shouldn't do anything.
Why would Chet do that...AND use Madison's scrnnme? Confused.
Madison wants to know if Dan ever made up a fake screenname for himself.
Who hasn't?? No offense, Maddie, but MadFinn kind of sucks.
Aimee has a secret, too! She might get a lead in the next ballet production!
$100 it'll be on The Wall tomorrow.
Madison's gym shorts are sort of tight and Ivy makes fun of them.
I thought tight things were in?? Ivy's just jealous.
Hehehe, Madison gets paired up with Ivy for volleyball.
Ivy: I despise volleyball.
That makes two of us.
Madison: You just despise everything and everyone.
Heheheheheh.
Madison finds a bulletin about Aimee on the wall...supposedly posted by herself. Instead of calling Aimee about it, she retreats to her files to be emo???
Whatever. Aimee will be calling to yell at you in like 2 minutes anyway.
Aimee and Madison have a fight. Aimee drags up stuff from the past, about all the times Madison has lied (she's only lied once). Aimee sort of sucks.
Lol.
As Aimee's leaving, she turns around and screams, "THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING!"
Egg thinks Fiona is stupid for being mad at Madison.
Go Egg!
Ivy gets "gravity" and "relativity" mixed up.
.....
Heh. Ivy and Madison have to do a science project together...and Madison makes Ivy do all the work. Payback.
Ivy: What did you find in the back?
Madison: No much. We should do more research upstairs in the media center, thought. Can you go look after school?
Ivy: Me? Why don't you go look after school.
Madison: I have an after-school conflict today.
Ivy: Well, I have a conflict, too. Like, I don't do science work after school. That's my conflict.
Madison: Maybe we should each write our own paper. I can ask Mr. Danehy if we can split-
Ivy: NO! Okay, I'll look in the media center. Don't throw a hissy about it. Gosh, you always overreact. What a drama queen.
GO MADISON!!
Mr. Danehy gives Ivy an F!!
Today is not Ivy's day.
Ugh, I hate it when people read over my shoulder!!!
Lance is a creepy kid.
Mrs. Wing brings her baby Phoebe to school.
Lance: My cousin had a big, fatso baby. He was so huge, he looked like he was stuffed.
Thanks, Lance.
Boys like babies, too.
It seems like Bigwheels is always either sick or grounded.
"SORRY I wasn't on my computer, but I was SICK and GROUNDED at the SAME TIME."
"Friends are forever, boys are whatever!"
What if all your friends are boys??
Madison wants revenge.
Noooo, don't do it, Madison! Revenge is never the answer!!
Madison writes a post about Ivy.
Posted by: MF13
Date: 11 Nov
Message: More big newz @ FHJH this time its I.D. in trouble wow is she ever. The WITCH is failing science. Yeah I.D. begged Mr. D. to pass her but he said no way so now the school is planning to EXPEL her...it is soooo bad Not only that but I heard that NO other school in the district wants to accept her b/c she has no real friends n e way LOL in fact there r no guys who will even look @ her b/c she dresses
That's as far as she gets before she accidentally publishes it.
Okay, who would even believe that? The part about having no friends and being a slut is pretty mean, but she wouldn't get EXPELLED for failing science.
Duh. Summer school.
Madison has become a pathological liar.
The bulletin won't be removed for 24 hours.
You sort of deserve it, Madison.
Revenge is never the answer.
"Now...Ivy will probably read what I posted and...she'll hate me forever and..."
"Wait just a minute, Maddie. I thought you and Ivy weren't friends anymore anyway."
Yeah!! What do you care what she thinks??
Shouldn't you be more worried about hurting her feelings than how she'll think of you? Because I'm pretty sure she already hates you.
Madison: Why are parents always right? And why am I always wrong?
Trust me, honey. Parents are NOT always right.
Lol, her dad is so delightfully evil.
"You're kidding! Oh, Maddie, you are most definitely going to tell your mother everything, from the beinning. We had a deal."
That's like on "Dan in Real Life".
"So Marty can stay?"
"*hysterical laughter* Marty can STAY???"
Madison can never go on The Wall again.
She is officially Off the Wall (that's where the title comes in).
Wait, MF13 is the one who's not allowed on the wall.
Madison could just create a new screename and go on whenever she wanted.
WtH???????
Lindsay, Aimee, and Fiona came over to apologize.
Why the sudden epiphany??
And why is Lindsay apologizing, too???
Madison had nothing to do with her Fat Camp thing!!! Lindsay probably didn't even know about the whole fight until now.
WHAT IS SHE DOING THERE??
It turns out Ivy told Hart she was MF13, and Hart told Chet who told Fiona.
Boys aren't the only shallow ones.
Such as girl on basketball team??
"Lauren, you'd be really pretty if you did this to your hair."
Um...thanks.
NICE!!! Madison's mom took away her laptop and is keeping it under lock and key in her desk drawer!!! Madison can only use it for one hour each day to check her e-mail!!
Finally! Good parenting!
Madison is super mean to Lance...even if he is a nerd.
Madison: I'm outta here.
Lance: But I just got here.
Madison: So? See you in class tomorrow.
Duh, Lance, you're the reason she's leaving.
Ivy: I'm never going to forget, you know.
Madison: Elephants never forget.
Ivy: Who are you calling.... OOOOOH! You think you're sooooo smart, don't you?
Madison just smiles and walks away.
The one time turning the other cheek actually WORKED.
Bigwheels is grounded because she told some kids a scary story.
Whatever. I bet it was the one about the finger.
Ew, I hate youngest children.
Madison's Computer Tip:
Beware of online gossip.
Truer words were never spoken.
I just read the last 2 Pony Pals books, and they were surprisingly enjoyable and kind of sad. Lulu's dad SUCKS; he's probably the worst father ever. So does Mrs. Crandal. It's like good parents don't EXIST in Wiggins. But that's all tomorrow; I have stuff to do.
Friday, April 4, 2008
Blubbery preteens always float, or FTFO Madison Finn #13: Sink or Swim
It's Madison's second summer in the series and she's STILL in 7th grade. The magic continues.
Plot: All of Madison's friends have plans for summer, but Madison doesn't have anything to do. Isn't that the point of summer, however? Not having ANY PLANS. Isn't RELAXING supposed to be your plan? Whatever.
Madison, desperate for something to keep herself occupied, gets a job as a mother's helper. She's now in charge of Eliot, an adorable 2-and-a-half year old boy, and his infant sister Becka. However, Eliot throws tantrums frequently, and Madison, who is completely passive, has trouble getting him to behave.
Aaagh, that's not the worst part. Eliot's mom is a TOTAL DITZ and spends all of her time with Becka, and then doesn't realize her absentee behavior is the root of Eliot's frustrations. She blames either Madison or Becka, the adorable baby.
Slut.
Madison's boss also sucks because whenever they go to the pool and Madison tries to hang out with her friends, Mrs. Reed is all, "Maddie, time to leave!" And because Madison has no spine, she silently fumes, but is unable to stand up for yourself.
On Pool Day, Eliot bonds with Madison and wins a blue ribbon. Finally they are becoming friends! But Madison is unable to enjoy the rest of pool day because right after the winning of the ribbon, Mrs. Reed suggests they leave.
Megaslut.
Nearing the end of the book, Madison is convinced for some reason that Eliot hates her (he doesn't) and that she's the worst mother's helper ever (she sort of is, but never mind).
However, Eliot proves otherwise; he shows Madison his secret closet of stuffed animals and then presents her with his treasured blue Pool Day ribbon. Awwwww.
However, Mrs. Reed's mothering issues are never addressed and she is content to leave Becka with the blame of Eliot's behavior issues.
I hate her. But Madison doesn't care, so I guess that's okay.
More notes:
Aimee, the environmentally concious ditz, squeezes in an important message about global warming. Propaganda in teen literature... *shakes head*
Ooh, Fiona has read "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" FOUR TIMES!!
Aw, Fiona and Egg are going out. Kind of sickening.
Egg, Drew, and Hart are junior lifeguards at the pool...another reason Madison wants to spend time there.
7th grade dialogue.
Aimee: Gee, I wonder if Ben Buckley will be at the pool, too.
Madison: Ben Buckley? What made you think of him?
Aimee: I don't know - um - um... What was I talking about?
Madison: Are you in like with Ben or what? I can't believe it.
Aimee: I am NOT in like with Ben. I was just...
Fiona: Ha-ha-HA! So I'm not the only one with a terminal crush?
Madison isn't exactly stealthy about her secret crush on Hart.
Lucky. Bigwheels is at horse camp IN THE MOUNTAINS. Sounds like Miracle Ranch. Jealous.
Madison is shocked that it rained when there was a 50% chance of rain. Sounds like Washington weather.
ROFL!!
"If everything was meeting at the cafe, Madison would be seeing Hart and the other boys. She needed an outfit that would say 'cute friend with possibilities'."
Aimee's helping her dad out at his cybercafe, but she's not getting paid?
Fiona's participating in a book-a-thon where the prize is TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS! The prize at MY library was a $25 gift certificate to Barnes & Nobles...from a DRAWING!!! SO LAME. I entered like 30 tickets and I didn't win!
"Madison wondered what it would be like to practice mouth-to-mouth on a real person - like Hart. Was it like real kissing?"
Trust me, it's not...though I don't have any real experience to back up that statement. But I've done mouth-to-mouth on a rubber person.
That sounded dirty.
Drew: Yeah, we're learning how to give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation and all that. The American Red Cross teaches it. We practice on rubber people. Started today. It's funny.
Egg: Nah. It's dumb.
Hart: It saves lives.
Egg: Are you kidding me?
Hart: Hey, Egg, we have the most important job at the pool.
Egg: Come on! We're junior lifeguards. We're not actually saving anyone. This isn't Baywatch, for Pete's sake.
Fiona: You shouldn't really joke about saving lives!!!
Way to be pyscho, Fiona. Egg totally freaks out and apologizes, though.
"'Aren't you volunteering at the animal clinic? You always do that. You and Dan.'
Madison rolled her eyes. She was friends with Dan, but the way Egg said that it sounded lik she was more than friends."
You guys MIGHT have been MORE than friends if you hadn't turned Dan down, Madison.
Although Dan took it better than Drew. Notice how Drew has totally stopped stalking Maddie? I kind of miss it.
Fiona tries to convince Madison to go out for the mother's helper job:
"Baby-sitting can be hard - but it can also be a lot of fun. Oh, it'll be so easy. You'll get paid for going to the pool. And she has cats! What's better than that?"
Yeah, Madison, she has cats!!
: I baby-sit sometimes for my cousin when his mom goes to the supermarket and stuff.
: is it hard?
: haven't u ever read The Babysitters Club?
LOL!!! I know what some people would have to say about that.
It's sort of obvious that Madison has absolutely NO experience with little kids.
Elliot: Pee-pee.
Madison: Um...is that some kind of game?
Heh. Eliot has two cats named Peanut Butter and Jelly.
Dang, Madison's making $125 a week. And she's only 12!!! I've never seen that much money in my life.
Hm, what type of bathing suit would a baby-sitter wear?
Just ask Stacey McGill. She's soooo sophisticated.
Hahaha. Some of the "themed" youth nights at the pool are Italian night, Halloween night, Magic Show (laaame), and South of the Border night (ROFL, SEXUAL IMAGERY!).
Aimee thinks Hart and Ivy are going out. :O SAY IT ISN'T SO!
"Yeah, and Maddie could go with Dan or Drew and we could triple-date!"
Um, that's probably not going to happen anytime soon...not after the VALENTINE'S DAY INCIDENT!!
Aimee's such a spaz. "OH, MY GOODNESS! He's here."
Ben Buckley walks by...AND TOTALLY IGNORES HER. Heh.
Lol. Eliot starts screaming, "POOOOOOOOP!" at the top of his lungs.
Awww, Eliot is sooo cute.
Oh no, he's escaped!
"'STOP THAT KID!' Madison yelled. She nearly landed flat on her face as she jumped out of the pool after him."
Noyce.
Hart saves the day...and kind of creeps me out in the process.
Hart: I don't think so! *picks up Eliot* This little guy's fast.
Eliot: Fast! FAST!
Hart: So you want the tickle monster, huh? Well, that's what you'll get, then.
Stupid Madison. Dan is so much cooler than lame-o Hart.
Mrs. Reed: Are you having fun with Madison, sweetie?
"Madison waited for Eliot to scream, 'NOOOOOOOOO! I hate her!" but he didn't."
Lol, I love Maddie.
Bigwheels: But you don't ever ever let the kid bite you. That happened to my friend Josie once and she had 2 get a tetanus shot or something like that.
Thanks, Bigwheels. Like she's really just gonna let the kid BITE HER.
Cherry yogurt = heaven.
Unless there are real cherries in it.
Eliot throws his apple juice at the wall...
...and it EXPLODES.
"'He's been so cranky lately,' Mrs. Reed said, wiping his hands off his hands and face. 'Ever since we had Becka...'"
Maybe because his dad's never around and YOU'RE A HORRIBLE MOTHER!!!
Lol, Madison and Eliot rock out to some Wee Sing.
Madison: Does Eliot go to Pool Day?
Mrs. Reed: Eliot is competing in the kickboard swim for toddlers. It's one of a handful of events for the wee ones. [Wee ones? What is she, Irish?] I think they have more competitions for the older children. I'm sure you've done Pool Day other summers before, right? You must have fond memories. I think Eliot has a shot at winning a kiddie ribbon.
Madison: And what will I be doing?
Mrs. Reed: What else? Spending time with Eliot, of course.
Oh, sorry if you had plans to participate in Pool Day, Madison. You'll be busy watching Eliot because I'M TOO BUSY SUCKING AT BEING A MOTHER.
I HAAATE this woman.
"Good morning. You know, Madison, you don't have to ring the doorbell when you come. I'm expecting you. Just walk inside. That way if I'm in the middle of changing a diaper or picking up toys or just losing my mind..."
Translation: Your ringing the doorbell messes me up. Never do it again; it p*sses me off.
Hart is back with his tickle machine.
Egg is just so hilarious. XP "So how's your boyfriend?"
LOL! Eliot throws Madison's pool bag into the POOL!
Actually, that would kind of suck if that happened to me or anyone else, but it's funny reading about it.
Ivy comes over and ridicules Madison and her baby-sitting charge.
Hello? She's getting PAID, Ivy, you lecherous ho.
Madison is way clingy in this one. She whines a lot.
Ew, nasty. Eliot pukes on Madison.
One of Madison's ideas for fun indoor games to play with Eliot is: Bath toys in the sink, towel on floor, take off shirt.
WHOA! Who will be taking off their shirt, Madison or Eliot?
Awwww, I love Eliot.
Madison: Good morning, Eliot! Hey, it's Maddie. Do you remember me?
Eliot: Course I 'member you! See my slide?
Eliot likes running around naked. Oh, the memories.
Even Madison notices that Mrs. Reed's the reason Eliot is so angry all the time. He'll probably need counseling by the time he's older.
Ben called Aimee? Wow. A junior high boy with real balls. Who knew?
Ha. Bigwheels' cousin stuck a ham sandwich and a carrot into the VCR. That should be on youtube.
Omg, Becka is not the problem!
Hart: Hey! No running!
Yeah, that's effective, Hart. Eliot trips and falls...and goes to Madison for comfort. Take that, Mrs. Reed.
Agh, stop putting yourself down, Madison. The kid TRIPPED. It's not your fault.
Mrs. Reed quotes "Gone With the Wind"?
"Oh, Madison. He'll get over it. Don't worry. Like I said, it was an accident. You'll be more careful next time. Tomorrow is another day."
Whoa. I like how she said, "It wasn't your fault," while simultaneously blaming her at the same time.
Oooh, Madison puts on a skirt to impress Hart. She has it bad.
Egg: So, did you guys see what happened at the pool today? Ivy Daly almost lost her top. Again. She is so weird.
Chet: And hot. I think she does it on purpose.
Lol, probably true.
Aw, Dan still likes Maddie. You can so tell.
DREW DROPS HIS MILKSHAKE ON MADDIE!!! AND IT WAS STRAWBERRY! You know, it was probably an accident, but I wouldn't be surprised if he did it on purpose.
You know. After she turned him down and all.
Oh, that's right, you DON'T know. We'll explore that in #11...WHICH I JUST GOT IN THE MAIL TODAY!!
Madison runs into the bathroom sobbing.
And takes off her clothes? It's a public bathroom, Madison. I hope you know YOU'RE NOT ALONE.
Fiona: I've actually been sort of jealous of you this summer.
Madison: Jealous? Of what?
Fiona: Well, I know I made a big deal about the book-a-thon and all that. [Psh, yeah you did.] And it is a big deal. [Not really.] But your job is so much cooler. You're doing something so important. And little Eliot will look up to you.
Madison: Wow. You really think that?
Aimee: She's right. I have a job at my dad's store, but I'm not helping some little kid like you.
Madison: It's so hard. He cries all the time. And nothing I say or do makes a difference.
Fiona: I bet it does. You just haven't seen it yet.
Whoa. This is getting way deep.
Uh-oh.
Aimee: Do you like Hart?
Madison: Huh?
Aimee: I know it's dumb, but the other day I heard him at the pool talking to Egg and Drew, and he was takling about you. And I was just wondering, if you like him, too, then maybe...
Fiona: Wow, that's interesting.
Madison: *having a heart attack*
Aimee: Sorry. That was a dumb thing to say. Hart is nice, but... Ivy Daly has her eye on him, anyhow.
So Madison is safe. That's so stupid, why wouldn't you just tell your friends the truth?
Then again, they'd giggle meaningfully at you all the time and make SUPER OBVIOUS hints when he was around. Never mind, I'd keep my mouth shut.
Egg: Hey, Maddie, your boyfriend looks cute today.
Madison: You know, if you're trying to be funny, Egg, try getting a new joke.
OOOOOH! PWNED!
"When she looked way up on the diving board, even Dan looked cuter than cute."
Implying that he normally doesn't look cute because he's fat and whatnot.
Ooooh...just...OOOOOH! Maddie and Dan as a couple would have been so amazing. Aaagh. It pains me.
Eliot wins the kickboard contest!
Lame. Madison can't watch ANY of her friends swim because they leave...after ONE event.
Madison realizes, however, that watching her friends swim isn't important. Playing with Eliot and gaining responsibility is the important thing.
Ooh, let's have a nail polish party!! Haha, so 7th grade.
Agh. Lindsay Frost is back. GO AWAY.
Way to be super obvious, Madison.
"Hart! Um...this is my mom...I think you met before...Maybe not..."
I'm trying to garner the meaning of this sentence.
Bigwheels: Our days are packed with trail riding and even some gymkhana like having a rodeo.
There needs to be a comma between "gymkhana" and "like", but even that doesn't make sense.
Ooh, Bigwheels meets a "really cute boy to like" at camp. He has the coolest green eyes...and lives in Idaho! Yeah, potatoes. Whoo.
Aw, Eliot shows Madison his secret zoo.
Then he gives her his blue ribbon. So adorable. Madison is a role model!
So Eliot and Madison are friends, Madison's getting paid, and summer has just begun. The End.
Madison's Computer Tip
I can look up just about anything online - and learn so many new things in a matter of minutes.
Okay then. Tomorrow we have "THE LONELY PONY"!!! Finally, right. Also, I'll read #11, AKA "Heart to Heart" as quickly as possible and maybe post it tomorrow. It involves a secret admirer, Dan, Drew, Hart, boys, dogs, and SO MUCH MORE. It's probably my favorite book in the series, because there's boys and dancing.
Plot: All of Madison's friends have plans for summer, but Madison doesn't have anything to do. Isn't that the point of summer, however? Not having ANY PLANS. Isn't RELAXING supposed to be your plan? Whatever.
Madison, desperate for something to keep herself occupied, gets a job as a mother's helper. She's now in charge of Eliot, an adorable 2-and-a-half year old boy, and his infant sister Becka. However, Eliot throws tantrums frequently, and Madison, who is completely passive, has trouble getting him to behave.
Aaagh, that's not the worst part. Eliot's mom is a TOTAL DITZ and spends all of her time with Becka, and then doesn't realize her absentee behavior is the root of Eliot's frustrations. She blames either Madison or Becka, the adorable baby.
Slut.
Madison's boss also sucks because whenever they go to the pool and Madison tries to hang out with her friends, Mrs. Reed is all, "Maddie, time to leave!" And because Madison has no spine, she silently fumes, but is unable to stand up for yourself.
On Pool Day, Eliot bonds with Madison and wins a blue ribbon. Finally they are becoming friends! But Madison is unable to enjoy the rest of pool day because right after the winning of the ribbon, Mrs. Reed suggests they leave.
Megaslut.
Nearing the end of the book, Madison is convinced for some reason that Eliot hates her (he doesn't) and that she's the worst mother's helper ever (she sort of is, but never mind).
However, Eliot proves otherwise; he shows Madison his secret closet of stuffed animals and then presents her with his treasured blue Pool Day ribbon. Awwwww.
However, Mrs. Reed's mothering issues are never addressed and she is content to leave Becka with the blame of Eliot's behavior issues.
I hate her. But Madison doesn't care, so I guess that's okay.
More notes:
Aimee, the environmentally concious ditz, squeezes in an important message about global warming. Propaganda in teen literature... *shakes head*
Ooh, Fiona has read "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" FOUR TIMES!!
Aw, Fiona and Egg are going out. Kind of sickening.
Egg, Drew, and Hart are junior lifeguards at the pool...another reason Madison wants to spend time there.
7th grade dialogue.
Aimee: Gee, I wonder if Ben Buckley will be at the pool, too.
Madison: Ben Buckley? What made you think of him?
Aimee: I don't know - um - um... What was I talking about?
Madison: Are you in like with Ben or what? I can't believe it.
Aimee: I am NOT in like with Ben. I was just...
Fiona: Ha-ha-HA! So I'm not the only one with a terminal crush?
Madison isn't exactly stealthy about her secret crush on Hart.
Lucky. Bigwheels is at horse camp IN THE MOUNTAINS. Sounds like Miracle Ranch. Jealous.
Madison is shocked that it rained when there was a 50% chance of rain. Sounds like Washington weather.
ROFL!!
"If everything was meeting at the cafe, Madison would be seeing Hart and the other boys. She needed an outfit that would say 'cute friend with possibilities'."
Aimee's helping her dad out at his cybercafe, but she's not getting paid?
Fiona's participating in a book-a-thon where the prize is TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS! The prize at MY library was a $25 gift certificate to Barnes & Nobles...from a DRAWING!!! SO LAME. I entered like 30 tickets and I didn't win!
"Madison wondered what it would be like to practice mouth-to-mouth on a real person - like Hart. Was it like real kissing?"
Trust me, it's not...though I don't have any real experience to back up that statement. But I've done mouth-to-mouth on a rubber person.
That sounded dirty.
Drew: Yeah, we're learning how to give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation and all that. The American Red Cross teaches it. We practice on rubber people. Started today. It's funny.
Egg: Nah. It's dumb.
Hart: It saves lives.
Egg: Are you kidding me?
Hart: Hey, Egg, we have the most important job at the pool.
Egg: Come on! We're junior lifeguards. We're not actually saving anyone. This isn't Baywatch, for Pete's sake.
Fiona: You shouldn't really joke about saving lives!!!
Way to be pyscho, Fiona. Egg totally freaks out and apologizes, though.
"'Aren't you volunteering at the animal clinic? You always do that. You and Dan.'
Madison rolled her eyes. She was friends with Dan, but the way Egg said that it sounded lik she was more than friends."
You guys MIGHT have been MORE than friends if you hadn't turned Dan down, Madison.
Although Dan took it better than Drew. Notice how Drew has totally stopped stalking Maddie? I kind of miss it.
Fiona tries to convince Madison to go out for the mother's helper job:
"Baby-sitting can be hard - but it can also be a lot of fun. Oh, it'll be so easy. You'll get paid for going to the pool. And she has cats! What's better than that?"
Yeah, Madison, she has cats!!
LOL!!! I know what some people would have to say about that.
It's sort of obvious that Madison has absolutely NO experience with little kids.
Elliot: Pee-pee.
Madison: Um...is that some kind of game?
Heh. Eliot has two cats named Peanut Butter and Jelly.
Dang, Madison's making $125 a week. And she's only 12!!! I've never seen that much money in my life.
Hm, what type of bathing suit would a baby-sitter wear?
Just ask Stacey McGill. She's soooo sophisticated.
Hahaha. Some of the "themed" youth nights at the pool are Italian night, Halloween night, Magic Show (laaame), and South of the Border night (ROFL, SEXUAL IMAGERY!).
Aimee thinks Hart and Ivy are going out. :O SAY IT ISN'T SO!
"Yeah, and Maddie could go with Dan or Drew and we could triple-date!"
Um, that's probably not going to happen anytime soon...not after the VALENTINE'S DAY INCIDENT!!
Aimee's such a spaz. "OH, MY GOODNESS! He's here."
Ben Buckley walks by...AND TOTALLY IGNORES HER. Heh.
Lol. Eliot starts screaming, "POOOOOOOOP!" at the top of his lungs.
Awww, Eliot is sooo cute.
Oh no, he's escaped!
"'STOP THAT KID!' Madison yelled. She nearly landed flat on her face as she jumped out of the pool after him."
Noyce.
Hart saves the day...and kind of creeps me out in the process.
Hart: I don't think so! *picks up Eliot* This little guy's fast.
Eliot: Fast! FAST!
Hart: So you want the tickle monster, huh? Well, that's what you'll get, then.
Stupid Madison. Dan is so much cooler than lame-o Hart.
Mrs. Reed: Are you having fun with Madison, sweetie?
"Madison waited for Eliot to scream, 'NOOOOOOOOO! I hate her!" but he didn't."
Lol, I love Maddie.
Bigwheels: But you don't ever ever let the kid bite you. That happened to my friend Josie once and she had 2 get a tetanus shot or something like that.
Thanks, Bigwheels. Like she's really just gonna let the kid BITE HER.
Cherry yogurt = heaven.
Unless there are real cherries in it.
Eliot throws his apple juice at the wall...
...and it EXPLODES.
"'He's been so cranky lately,' Mrs. Reed said, wiping his hands off his hands and face. 'Ever since we had Becka...'"
Maybe because his dad's never around and YOU'RE A HORRIBLE MOTHER!!!
Lol, Madison and Eliot rock out to some Wee Sing.
Madison: Does Eliot go to Pool Day?
Mrs. Reed: Eliot is competing in the kickboard swim for toddlers. It's one of a handful of events for the wee ones. [Wee ones? What is she, Irish?] I think they have more competitions for the older children. I'm sure you've done Pool Day other summers before, right? You must have fond memories. I think Eliot has a shot at winning a kiddie ribbon.
Madison: And what will I be doing?
Mrs. Reed: What else? Spending time with Eliot, of course.
Oh, sorry if you had plans to participate in Pool Day, Madison. You'll be busy watching Eliot because I'M TOO BUSY SUCKING AT BEING A MOTHER.
I HAAATE this woman.
"Good morning. You know, Madison, you don't have to ring the doorbell when you come. I'm expecting you. Just walk inside. That way if I'm in the middle of changing a diaper or picking up toys or just losing my mind..."
Translation: Your ringing the doorbell messes me up. Never do it again; it p*sses me off.
Hart is back with his tickle machine.
Egg is just so hilarious. XP "So how's your boyfriend?"
LOL! Eliot throws Madison's pool bag into the POOL!
Actually, that would kind of suck if that happened to me or anyone else, but it's funny reading about it.
Ivy comes over and ridicules Madison and her baby-sitting charge.
Hello? She's getting PAID, Ivy, you lecherous ho.
Madison is way clingy in this one. She whines a lot.
Ew, nasty. Eliot pukes on Madison.
One of Madison's ideas for fun indoor games to play with Eliot is: Bath toys in the sink, towel on floor, take off shirt.
WHOA! Who will be taking off their shirt, Madison or Eliot?
Awwww, I love Eliot.
Madison: Good morning, Eliot! Hey, it's Maddie. Do you remember me?
Eliot: Course I 'member you! See my slide?
Eliot likes running around naked. Oh, the memories.
Even Madison notices that Mrs. Reed's the reason Eliot is so angry all the time. He'll probably need counseling by the time he's older.
Ben called Aimee? Wow. A junior high boy with real balls. Who knew?
Ha. Bigwheels' cousin stuck a ham sandwich and a carrot into the VCR. That should be on youtube.
Omg, Becka is not the problem!
Hart: Hey! No running!
Yeah, that's effective, Hart. Eliot trips and falls...and goes to Madison for comfort. Take that, Mrs. Reed.
Agh, stop putting yourself down, Madison. The kid TRIPPED. It's not your fault.
Mrs. Reed quotes "Gone With the Wind"?
"Oh, Madison. He'll get over it. Don't worry. Like I said, it was an accident. You'll be more careful next time. Tomorrow is another day."
Whoa. I like how she said, "It wasn't your fault," while simultaneously blaming her at the same time.
Oooh, Madison puts on a skirt to impress Hart. She has it bad.
Egg: So, did you guys see what happened at the pool today? Ivy Daly almost lost her top. Again. She is so weird.
Chet: And hot. I think she does it on purpose.
Lol, probably true.
Aw, Dan still likes Maddie. You can so tell.
DREW DROPS HIS MILKSHAKE ON MADDIE!!! AND IT WAS STRAWBERRY! You know, it was probably an accident, but I wouldn't be surprised if he did it on purpose.
You know. After she turned him down and all.
Oh, that's right, you DON'T know. We'll explore that in #11...WHICH I JUST GOT IN THE MAIL TODAY!!
Madison runs into the bathroom sobbing.
And takes off her clothes? It's a public bathroom, Madison. I hope you know YOU'RE NOT ALONE.
Fiona: I've actually been sort of jealous of you this summer.
Madison: Jealous? Of what?
Fiona: Well, I know I made a big deal about the book-a-thon and all that. [Psh, yeah you did.] And it is a big deal. [Not really.] But your job is so much cooler. You're doing something so important. And little Eliot will look up to you.
Madison: Wow. You really think that?
Aimee: She's right. I have a job at my dad's store, but I'm not helping some little kid like you.
Madison: It's so hard. He cries all the time. And nothing I say or do makes a difference.
Fiona: I bet it does. You just haven't seen it yet.
Whoa. This is getting way deep.
Uh-oh.
Aimee: Do you like Hart?
Madison: Huh?
Aimee: I know it's dumb, but the other day I heard him at the pool talking to Egg and Drew, and he was takling about you. And I was just wondering, if you like him, too, then maybe...
Fiona: Wow, that's interesting.
Madison: *having a heart attack*
Aimee: Sorry. That was a dumb thing to say. Hart is nice, but... Ivy Daly has her eye on him, anyhow.
So Madison is safe. That's so stupid, why wouldn't you just tell your friends the truth?
Then again, they'd giggle meaningfully at you all the time and make SUPER OBVIOUS hints when he was around. Never mind, I'd keep my mouth shut.
Egg: Hey, Maddie, your boyfriend looks cute today.
Madison: You know, if you're trying to be funny, Egg, try getting a new joke.
OOOOOH! PWNED!
"When she looked way up on the diving board, even Dan looked cuter than cute."
Implying that he normally doesn't look cute because he's fat and whatnot.
Ooooh...just...OOOOOH! Maddie and Dan as a couple would have been so amazing. Aaagh. It pains me.
Eliot wins the kickboard contest!
Lame. Madison can't watch ANY of her friends swim because they leave...after ONE event.
Madison realizes, however, that watching her friends swim isn't important. Playing with Eliot and gaining responsibility is the important thing.
Ooh, let's have a nail polish party!! Haha, so 7th grade.
Agh. Lindsay Frost is back. GO AWAY.
Way to be super obvious, Madison.
"Hart! Um...this is my mom...I think you met before...Maybe not..."
I'm trying to garner the meaning of this sentence.
Bigwheels: Our days are packed with trail riding and even some gymkhana like having a rodeo.
There needs to be a comma between "gymkhana" and "like", but even that doesn't make sense.
Ooh, Bigwheels meets a "really cute boy to like" at camp. He has the coolest green eyes...and lives in Idaho! Yeah, potatoes. Whoo.
Aw, Eliot shows Madison his secret zoo.
Then he gives her his blue ribbon. So adorable. Madison is a role model!
So Eliot and Madison are friends, Madison's getting paid, and summer has just begun. The End.
Madison's Computer Tip
I can look up just about anything online - and learn so many new things in a matter of minutes.
Okay then. Tomorrow we have "THE LONELY PONY"!!! Finally, right. Also, I'll read #11, AKA "Heart to Heart" as quickly as possible and maybe post it tomorrow. It involves a secret admirer, Dan, Drew, Hart, boys, dogs, and SO MUCH MORE. It's probably my favorite book in the series, because there's boys and dancing.
Monday, December 31, 2007
I require your opinion on a matter most grevious in nature.
Should I write some fanfic? I'm going to whether you like it or not, but there's the matter of posting it on the internet (or more specifically, this blog) if any of you would be interested in reading it. It would be a parody, of course, and will hopefully be better than a certain soap of mine.
I don't know.
I did make a poll. Oh, how democratic.
Just travel on over to the little box on the right...ON THE RIGHT...ON THE RIGHT...just making sure.
I'm partly only writing this post because I don't want to post anything right now. I'm sort of bored.
And I really want to read the third Maximum Ride book.
And the second Gossip Girl book.
I don't know.
I did make a poll. Oh, how democratic.
Just travel on over to the little box on the right...ON THE RIGHT...ON THE RIGHT...just making sure.
I'm partly only writing this post because I don't want to post anything right now. I'm sort of bored.
And I really want to read the third Maximum Ride book.
And the second Gossip Girl book.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Ooh, shiny things, or Avalon #2: Web of Magic: All That Glitters
Seriously, this is my favorite Avalon book. No lie. I mean, look at that sparkly cover. I think the pictures of the d-flies are innacurate, though. They look like crap.
Plot: Kara is rather frustrated with Adriane and Emily. First of all, they have magic gems and she doesn't. Also, they expect her to WORK when all she wants to do is party with her friends.
Mostly, Adriane is overreacting about EVERYTHING, Kara is being kind of ditzy, and Emily is just being annoying and peacemaker-y.
Then weird things start happening to Kara! Banshees (tortured souls cursed to wander the Shadowlands, of course) start attacking her, she's being followed around by the mysterious cat from book #1 [who is named Lyra], and she finally has her own magic jewel! It looks just like a unicorn horn. However, Emily and Adriane freak out and tell her not to use it.
Naturally, Kara doesn't listen.
Whenever she uses the jewel, chaos ensues. The magical little piece of shiny rock attracts all kinds of creatures, from adorable little dragonflies (literally miniature dragons that fly) and...*gasp* BANSHEES! One attacks Kara in her house and tries to take the jewel, but she pwns it, burning off part of her hair in the process. She tries to fix it, and it grows longer, but then it doesn't STOP! She calls Emily and Adriane, and Adriane screws it up even more; though she gets it to stop growing, Kara's blonde hair is now rainbow-colored.
Kara goes to school the next day and is shocked when the principal starts talking about the work she's done at Ravenswood Wildlife Preserve, and is then forced on stage, where her shocking hair color(s) is (are?) revealed. Emily saves her and says it's a symbol of unity or something. Kara realizes she really likes working at the Preserve and starts treating Emily and Adriane (even though Adriane's a loser) nicer, and gets her loser friends to stop making fun of them.
On Saturday, she takes a little trip to the mall to get her hair dyed to its natural color when she's attacked by some more banshees. Lyra saves her, but then gets injured by being stupid. Kara is majorly confused and kind of sad when a unicorn just randomly walks up to her and tells her he can save Lyra. Um...yay?
First stop...a magicalish place, where Kara meets some wraiths who tell her to save their sisters and convince her that the unicorn jewel is not hers to keep.
They go to a field, where they meet up with Adriane and Emily...big surprise. A creepy old woman tries to get Kara to give her the jewel, monologuing about the love of power and crap like that, but Kara gives it to the banshees, who are really some whacked-out ugly wraiths. Old creepy woman disappears with a snarl.
Um, yay.
And Emily saves Lyra after a major pep talk from Kara.
So Kara becomes a better person. The end.
Oh, and they set up the Ravenswood website.
And the epilogue was about mistwolves. Tartar sauce. I guess that means the next book is about Adriane.
You know, I took that character quiz again, and I'm still a warrior. Darn.
More notes:
Oookay, apparently Kara has enough clothes to cover every available surface and fill her closet. NOT STEREOTYPED AT ALL.
credhed, beachbunny, and goodgollymolly? Try worst screennames ever.
Duh! Your outfit for seventh grade is WAY more important than endangered animals!
Ugh, Kara's friends suck. They're so mean.
Okay, I take back what I said about her friends' screennames, because Emily's is docdolittle. :P
Yay, Kara's actually good at school! We're breaking down barriers!
I hate it in books where the main character screams and then looks around to see who did it. HOW CAN YOU NOT REALIZE YOU'RE SCREAMING??
"That was, like, so weird!" Thanks, Heather.
"Been a rough morning. Kara had like a major freakout in homeroom." Don't you love it when your friends talk about you...in front of you?
I'm having a REALLY hard time picturing this cute Marcus guy that Kara likes. I'm switching back and forth between Penn Badgley and Garrett Hedlund.
"Next thing you know, monsters are gonna be falling out of the sky!"
Funny you should mention that....
This is the moment Lyra chooses to fall out of the sky.
Okay, Lyra was the size of an ocelot in the first book. Now she's the size of a leopard, which is significantly bigger than an ocelot. How did it get so big??
I somehow don't picture Adriane very tall. I picture her and Emily quite short. Like 5'3". And Kara maybe 5'5" or 5'6".
Red and auburn aren't necessarily the same color. STOP CONFUSING ME!!
Adriane only says she likes being a loner because she knows she's incapable of making friends.
Lyra: *pops out of bushes* Rawr.
Kara: Aaah!
Adriane: WHAT DID YOU DO, KARA!!?? RAAAAH SNARL GRAWFF!
They make it seem like Kara is the ringleader of her little clique, but her friends are way pushy.
I highly doubt you are the only three girls on Earth that know that magic is real, Kara.
I hate when they describe Adriane using magic. They try to make it sound all cool and it sounds so retarded, and she obviously takes herself so seriously. All it is is her taking a karate stance and spinning around.
Oooh, Adriane called Kara a "Barbie". :O Whatever, that would pretty much be a compliment. I mean, I'd love to have a ridiculously thin waist, a tight butt, and nice boobs. Plus "immaculate" hair (that's for you, Lucy Daniels).
Kara thinks it's weird talking to a ferret, and then she remembers Ozzie is really an ELF trapped inside a ferret's body! Yeah, cuz that's not weird at all.
Kara: Why does that garden have an X on it?
Adriane: It's the hedge maze. Gran said you can get lost in there for days, so it's off-limits for tours.
Hmm, could that possibly be FORESHADOWING of someone getting lost in the maze???
Kara offers to have her friends help with the website and Adriane's like, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! They're loudmouths!" And you're a ho....
Why is Kara shocked that Adriane doesn't consider her a friend? That seemed PRETTY obvious.
"She imagined medieval torches encircling the magnificent garden...with the rocking sounds of Sampleton Malls blasting from the stage! She giggled. And Kara, the princess of the ball, in the most rad leather-and-silk gown, dancing the night away with the most handsome prince. Adriane can stay home and be the wicked stepsister, she thought with a laugh as she twirled into the rose gardens."
Proof that all girls have a Cinderella fantasy. No lie, EVERY GIRL has one.
Lame. She gets lost in the hedge maze a mere 5 pages later. It could have been a final showdown in the maze!!! But no...waste all that good foreshadowing.
Lol. Kara pictures herself:
Lustrous blond hair, creamy skin, dewy red lips - no, she'd sowrn off lip gloss long ago, make that pale pink lips.
Quick! A new pair of Nikes with shock soles!
Kara's first attempt at magic:
"Think! Do what Adriane did. Kara concentrated - left, right, arms together, swing tight.... She pinwheeled her arms, whipping the crystal shell around, and landed on one knee, jewel pointed toward the monster. Tiny sparkles fizzled from the tip...and died. Kara frowned. That cheer routine killed at the home game."
I haaate Ozzie. Storm is annoying about honor and crap like that, but Ozzie is SOOOOOO annoying.
Balthazar (the magical winged pony): It looked like a banshee.
Kara: A what?
Balthazar: A tortured soul doomed to wander the Shadowlands. [I bet he could hardly keep himself from saying, "Duh."]
Adriane: Thank goodness you were there! We can't have monsters running around the preserve washing clothes!
HAHAHAHA they find Mr. Gardener's computer and a voice says, "Welcome to the magic web." Lol. You've got mail.
Mr. Gardener owns Ravenswood, but disappeared a while back.
"Girls, it's got rhythm, and I have got the moves!" But you're white....
:O Kara went to the LIBRARY!!?? Shocking. "Hmm, geeky influence, with a touch of dweeb."
Okay, everything Kara's friends say endz with a z. I guezz that makez it glitter fabulouz.
Joey has a huge crush on Adriane, lol.
This is the lamest party ever, Kara. All you guys are doing is eating...and eating.
Kara's brother is an idiot. "Kara, your ice cream's getting cold!"
Wait, Kara has a tan? I thought she had creamy skin.
Whoa, a banshee ambushes her in the Jacuzzi!
I'm picturing Kara naked during the fight scene that follows. Not for any pervy reason, but it said something about her stripping, so what am I supposed to do?
Kara: What happened to it?
Lyra: Something frightened the creature.
Kara: What? Me?
I don't know, a naked blonde girl wielding a shiny jewel is pretty frightening....
Wait, Emily and Adriane are there now. Is Kara naked or not??? SO CONFUSED!!
Awww. The dragonflies have names! I forget which color corresponds to which dragonfly, but their names are Goldie, Barney, Rocky, Fiona, and Fred; Fiona is red and Goldie is...yellow.
Adriane, shut up and stop making hair puns.
Jealous, I want rainbow hair. I don't know why Kara hates it so much.
I want a blue plaid jacket...but I wouldn't wear it with a pink cotton beret.
Dragonflies appear with a pop. Goldie appears and Kara pretends she farted. ....
You can't send someone home for having cool hair. Dressing like a slut, yes. Having cool hair, no. At least not at my school.
Coalition. Nice word, Emily.
Kyle: Who'd a thunk under all that black is a fasion designer!
Adriane: I'm not big on fashion.
Heather: That's for sure.
Ooooooooooooh.
I like how all the punk bands have stupid names. Like Toad Force! or Smash Fish!
Awww, Joey and Adriane bond over Smash Fish. And Adriane BLUSHES. Whaaat, she likes boys??
Aaaah, someone sends Kara a magic computer message: I KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
Kara: How do you know when a jewel is really for you?
Adriane: Our jewels changed as we used them. It's like they reflect a part of who we are. You just know, Kara.
Emily: In your heart.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! *gag*
Ozzie is so mean! "Maybe it's a test. Maybe you're not the blazing star."
Having a super hard time picturing this pure white unicorn without him looking like a unipony.
Lyra is being attacked by mall security guards!! Oh, she has wings all of a sudden, how convenient.
Oooh, she falls to the ground.
Why do all magical creatures speak in italics??
The wraiths sound like wannabe LOTR elves...only green.
The banshees use z's instead of s's, too. "Plesszze, help uszz."
Ozzie: Look what they've made!
Adriane: It looks like a-
Emily: -dreamcatcher!
Ugh, just like Stephen King. And now they'll save a kid with Downs Syndrome from bullies and realize that he is the dreamcatcher weaving them all together.
Whaaaaat? The unicorn has a harem??
"You have freed my maidens, and I am forever grateful."
Maybe he's a pimp.
Kara's friends are still lame.
I think Adriane has the coolest chain for her jewel...it's turquoise.
Their password for the secret website is AVALON. Yeah, people won't be able to figure THAT one out.
I HAAAATE mistwolves.
So I'll be doing the second book in the Horseshoe Trilogies, and I might be able to do more than one per day, since I'm on Christmas break!!! But Avalon #3 will be about Adriane. Laaaame.
Plot: Kara is rather frustrated with Adriane and Emily. First of all, they have magic gems and she doesn't. Also, they expect her to WORK when all she wants to do is party with her friends.
Mostly, Adriane is overreacting about EVERYTHING, Kara is being kind of ditzy, and Emily is just being annoying and peacemaker-y.
Then weird things start happening to Kara! Banshees (tortured souls cursed to wander the Shadowlands, of course) start attacking her, she's being followed around by the mysterious cat from book #1 [who is named Lyra], and she finally has her own magic jewel! It looks just like a unicorn horn. However, Emily and Adriane freak out and tell her not to use it.
Naturally, Kara doesn't listen.
Whenever she uses the jewel, chaos ensues. The magical little piece of shiny rock attracts all kinds of creatures, from adorable little dragonflies (literally miniature dragons that fly) and...*gasp* BANSHEES! One attacks Kara in her house and tries to take the jewel, but she pwns it, burning off part of her hair in the process. She tries to fix it, and it grows longer, but then it doesn't STOP! She calls Emily and Adriane, and Adriane screws it up even more; though she gets it to stop growing, Kara's blonde hair is now rainbow-colored.
Kara goes to school the next day and is shocked when the principal starts talking about the work she's done at Ravenswood Wildlife Preserve, and is then forced on stage, where her shocking hair color(s) is (are?) revealed. Emily saves her and says it's a symbol of unity or something. Kara realizes she really likes working at the Preserve and starts treating Emily and Adriane (even though Adriane's a loser) nicer, and gets her loser friends to stop making fun of them.
On Saturday, she takes a little trip to the mall to get her hair dyed to its natural color when she's attacked by some more banshees. Lyra saves her, but then gets injured by being stupid. Kara is majorly confused and kind of sad when a unicorn just randomly walks up to her and tells her he can save Lyra. Um...yay?
First stop...a magicalish place, where Kara meets some wraiths who tell her to save their sisters and convince her that the unicorn jewel is not hers to keep.
They go to a field, where they meet up with Adriane and Emily...big surprise. A creepy old woman tries to get Kara to give her the jewel, monologuing about the love of power and crap like that, but Kara gives it to the banshees, who are really some whacked-out ugly wraiths. Old creepy woman disappears with a snarl.
Um, yay.
And Emily saves Lyra after a major pep talk from Kara.
So Kara becomes a better person. The end.
Oh, and they set up the Ravenswood website.
And the epilogue was about mistwolves. Tartar sauce. I guess that means the next book is about Adriane.
You know, I took that character quiz again, and I'm still a warrior. Darn.
More notes:
Oookay, apparently Kara has enough clothes to cover every available surface and fill her closet. NOT STEREOTYPED AT ALL.
credhed, beachbunny, and goodgollymolly? Try worst screennames ever.
Duh! Your outfit for seventh grade is WAY more important than endangered animals!
Ugh, Kara's friends suck. They're so mean.
Okay, I take back what I said about her friends' screennames, because Emily's is docdolittle. :P
Yay, Kara's actually good at school! We're breaking down barriers!
I hate it in books where the main character screams and then looks around to see who did it. HOW CAN YOU NOT REALIZE YOU'RE SCREAMING??
"That was, like, so weird!" Thanks, Heather.
"Been a rough morning. Kara had like a major freakout in homeroom." Don't you love it when your friends talk about you...in front of you?
I'm having a REALLY hard time picturing this cute Marcus guy that Kara likes. I'm switching back and forth between Penn Badgley and Garrett Hedlund.
"Next thing you know, monsters are gonna be falling out of the sky!"
Funny you should mention that....
This is the moment Lyra chooses to fall out of the sky.
Okay, Lyra was the size of an ocelot in the first book. Now she's the size of a leopard, which is significantly bigger than an ocelot. How did it get so big??
I somehow don't picture Adriane very tall. I picture her and Emily quite short. Like 5'3". And Kara maybe 5'5" or 5'6".
Red and auburn aren't necessarily the same color. STOP CONFUSING ME!!
Adriane only says she likes being a loner because she knows she's incapable of making friends.
Lyra: *pops out of bushes* Rawr.
Kara: Aaah!
Adriane: WHAT DID YOU DO, KARA!!?? RAAAAH SNARL GRAWFF!
They make it seem like Kara is the ringleader of her little clique, but her friends are way pushy.
I highly doubt you are the only three girls on Earth that know that magic is real, Kara.
I hate when they describe Adriane using magic. They try to make it sound all cool and it sounds so retarded, and she obviously takes herself so seriously. All it is is her taking a karate stance and spinning around.
Oooh, Adriane called Kara a "Barbie". :O Whatever, that would pretty much be a compliment. I mean, I'd love to have a ridiculously thin waist, a tight butt, and nice boobs. Plus "immaculate" hair (that's for you, Lucy Daniels).
Kara thinks it's weird talking to a ferret, and then she remembers Ozzie is really an ELF trapped inside a ferret's body! Yeah, cuz that's not weird at all.
Kara: Why does that garden have an X on it?
Adriane: It's the hedge maze. Gran said you can get lost in there for days, so it's off-limits for tours.
Hmm, could that possibly be FORESHADOWING of someone getting lost in the maze???
Kara offers to have her friends help with the website and Adriane's like, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! They're loudmouths!" And you're a ho....
Why is Kara shocked that Adriane doesn't consider her a friend? That seemed PRETTY obvious.
"She imagined medieval torches encircling the magnificent garden...with the rocking sounds of Sampleton Malls blasting from the stage! She giggled. And Kara, the princess of the ball, in the most rad leather-and-silk gown, dancing the night away with the most handsome prince. Adriane can stay home and be the wicked stepsister, she thought with a laugh as she twirled into the rose gardens."
Proof that all girls have a Cinderella fantasy. No lie, EVERY GIRL has one.
Lame. She gets lost in the hedge maze a mere 5 pages later. It could have been a final showdown in the maze!!! But no...waste all that good foreshadowing.
Lol. Kara pictures herself:
Lustrous blond hair, creamy skin, dewy red lips - no, she'd sowrn off lip gloss long ago, make that pale pink lips.
Quick! A new pair of Nikes with shock soles!
Kara's first attempt at magic:
"Think! Do what Adriane did. Kara concentrated - left, right, arms together, swing tight.... She pinwheeled her arms, whipping the crystal shell around, and landed on one knee, jewel pointed toward the monster. Tiny sparkles fizzled from the tip...and died. Kara frowned. That cheer routine killed at the home game."
I haaate Ozzie. Storm is annoying about honor and crap like that, but Ozzie is SOOOOOO annoying.
Balthazar (the magical winged pony): It looked like a banshee.
Kara: A what?
Balthazar: A tortured soul doomed to wander the Shadowlands. [I bet he could hardly keep himself from saying, "Duh."]
Adriane: Thank goodness you were there! We can't have monsters running around the preserve washing clothes!
HAHAHAHA they find Mr. Gardener's computer and a voice says, "Welcome to the magic web." Lol. You've got mail.
Mr. Gardener owns Ravenswood, but disappeared a while back.
"Girls, it's got rhythm, and I have got the moves!" But you're white....
:O Kara went to the LIBRARY!!?? Shocking. "Hmm, geeky influence, with a touch of dweeb."
Okay, everything Kara's friends say endz with a z. I guezz that makez it glitter fabulouz.
Joey has a huge crush on Adriane, lol.
This is the lamest party ever, Kara. All you guys are doing is eating...and eating.
Kara's brother is an idiot. "Kara, your ice cream's getting cold!"
Wait, Kara has a tan? I thought she had creamy skin.
Whoa, a banshee ambushes her in the Jacuzzi!
I'm picturing Kara naked during the fight scene that follows. Not for any pervy reason, but it said something about her stripping, so what am I supposed to do?
Kara: What happened to it?
Lyra: Something frightened the creature.
Kara: What? Me?
I don't know, a naked blonde girl wielding a shiny jewel is pretty frightening....
Wait, Emily and Adriane are there now. Is Kara naked or not??? SO CONFUSED!!
Awww. The dragonflies have names! I forget which color corresponds to which dragonfly, but their names are Goldie, Barney, Rocky, Fiona, and Fred; Fiona is red and Goldie is...yellow.
Adriane, shut up and stop making hair puns.
Jealous, I want rainbow hair. I don't know why Kara hates it so much.
I want a blue plaid jacket...but I wouldn't wear it with a pink cotton beret.
Dragonflies appear with a pop. Goldie appears and Kara pretends she farted. ....
You can't send someone home for having cool hair. Dressing like a slut, yes. Having cool hair, no. At least not at my school.
Coalition. Nice word, Emily.
Kyle: Who'd a thunk under all that black is a fasion designer!
Adriane: I'm not big on fashion.
Heather: That's for sure.
Ooooooooooooh.
I like how all the punk bands have stupid names. Like Toad Force! or Smash Fish!
Awww, Joey and Adriane bond over Smash Fish. And Adriane BLUSHES. Whaaat, she likes boys??
Aaaah, someone sends Kara a magic computer message: I KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
Kara: How do you know when a jewel is really for you?
Adriane: Our jewels changed as we used them. It's like they reflect a part of who we are. You just know, Kara.
Emily: In your heart.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! *gag*
Ozzie is so mean! "Maybe it's a test. Maybe you're not the blazing star."
Having a super hard time picturing this pure white unicorn without him looking like a unipony.
Lyra is being attacked by mall security guards!! Oh, she has wings all of a sudden, how convenient.
Oooh, she falls to the ground.
Why do all magical creatures speak in italics??
The wraiths sound like wannabe LOTR elves...only green.
The banshees use z's instead of s's, too. "Plesszze, help uszz."
Ozzie: Look what they've made!
Adriane: It looks like a-
Emily: -dreamcatcher!
Ugh, just like Stephen King. And now they'll save a kid with Downs Syndrome from bullies and realize that he is the dreamcatcher weaving them all together.
Whaaaaat? The unicorn has a harem??
"You have freed my maidens, and I am forever grateful."
Maybe he's a pimp.
Kara's friends are still lame.
I think Adriane has the coolest chain for her jewel...it's turquoise.
Their password for the secret website is AVALON. Yeah, people won't be able to figure THAT one out.
I HAAAATE mistwolves.
So I'll be doing the second book in the Horseshoe Trilogies, and I might be able to do more than one per day, since I'm on Christmas break!!! But Avalon #3 will be about Adriane. Laaaame.
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