If someone is mean, they have issues, or FTFO Madison Finn #19: Keep It Real

I read this a while ago. Haven't been posting, though, because it's summer and I could be...you know...watching "Monk" and playing with my dog.
Speaking of Tie, she was totally lying right next to me 2 seconds ago. What happened?



Plot: Madison Finn has had enough of Ivy Daly!!! Her English class has just received a new journal writing assignment, and Ivy always writes about how perfect and wonderful her life is. It just makes Madison sick; partly because Ivy is such a fake, and partly because Ivy writes so much in her journal. Journal writing is Madison's territory!!!
It turns out Ivy's life is NOT so perfect after all!!! Her mom has breast cancer.
Fran tells Madison to be nice to Ivy because her mom is sort of dying, but Madison finds it hard when Ivy continues to be such a meanie.
Finally, she convinces her friends to stop giving Ivy such a hard time. Good enough.

More notes:
"We started 'journaling', which is basically keeping track of feelings and observations and all that [in case you didn't know what journaling was]...which is what I do every day on this computer anyway! [Lol, me, too!]"

Madison's first assignment is to write about a very successful or very embarassing moment. Pick embarassing, you've got plenty of those.

The Gang goes to Madison's house.
Hart: Gee, I've never been in your house before.
Drew: Yeah, you have. Haven't you?
Fiona: *to Madison* You WISH Hart had been in your house before....

Egg almost breaks a glass penguin belonging to Madison's mom.
Madison: Careful! My mom got that in the antarctic!
Because they have so many glass penguin shops in the antarctic.

Madison finds it weird that Egg speaks Spanish...even though he's bilingual.
Although he's quite "Dora the Explorer" about it. "Mi mami got it for me. She rocks."

"As Egg clicked away, Madison prayed that his fingers wouldn't slip and cause him to select one of her e-mail messages or open the secret folder on her desktop tht held her files. She had visions of Hart standing there while a dozen different files carrying his name opened up.
Hart Jones
Hart (continued)
Mr. & Mrs. Jones
The One
Him"
Wow. She has officially passed into stalking territory.

Ooh, there's a new exotic website called BLOGGERfishbowl, where bigfishbowl members can BLOG.

Oh no, they come across Madison's journal assignment...and it's blank.
Hm. Either way, that sucks.

Ivy accuses Madison of wicked PMS, but Madison doesn't want to admit that she HASN'T STARTED HER PERIOD.
I don't think she ever will, if it's been three years and she's still 12.

Madison's like, "Ew, Hart has crooked teeth."
So????

Hart: Looked like Ivy and you were arguing.
Madison: Big surprise.
Hart: She gets weirder every day.
Madison: I actually thought you liked her.
Hart: Me? Like Ivy? Uh...not exactly. She's pretty and all that, but sometimes she's just...well, I said it. She's a big weirdo.
Madison: She likes you.
Hart: Whatever.
I think he still likes her. Way to lie and be all, "Me, like her? No way."

Hart: Later, Finnster. Er...Maddie. Sorry, I guess I should stop calling you Finnster. I know it bugs you.
Madison: Yeah, well... No, Finnster isn't so bad. I like it. Don't stop. Really.
Hart: Really?
Madison: I just need to think of a good nickname for you.
Hart: Uh...Egg calls me Loser sometimes. Or Weasel.
Madison: I was thinking more like Hunk.
Hart: Huh? What did you just say???
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Madison: What? I said, 'Dork'. Why? What did you think I said?
Hart: Oh yeah, that's me. Super Dork, actually. *wink*
Phew. Crisis averted. ROFL, that was pretty hilarious, though.

Aimee is depressed because her ballet teacher has breast cancer. Foreshadowing?

Madison tells her mom about the breast cancer.
Fran: It seems like so many women I know have it these days.
Madison: Really? I remember your friend from work. Who else?
Fran: Oh. No one in particular, honey bear.
More foreshadowing!!!

Madison is surfing BLOGGERfishbowl when she comes across a blog written by...*drumroll*...Vicki, AKA Bigwheels, HER KEYPAL!!!
Bigwheels' latest entry:
I know I need to just relax but how can I relax when I don't get any sleep either? I think I'm going to check out one of the chat rooms Dad told me about. I never knew it affected so many kids. I also found out that I can volunteer down @ the speech center in Seattle. I don't think I'll be working with kids who have autism but I will probably learn a lot.
--BW

Autism??? What a concept.
Madison is less concerned by the entry, however, and more concerned about why BIGWHEELS NEVER TOLD HER ABOUT THIS SECRET BLOG!! BETRAYAL!!!

Hey, Madison gets an e-mail from Hart...one that turns out to be a mistake:
From: Sk8ingboy
Hey, guys, my dad just called the FH rink and the dude there said we can play next wkend which is cool so let's find other guys and we'll be hooked up. I was thinking maybe we could go over to Drew's to play the Zone again b4 we sk8 since the game @ Maddie's was so lame. Ok. E-me l8r.

Whoa, wait. The game at Maddie's was LAME? Does that mean the game was stupid or Madison is lame?

Madison has to write a story about a scar, so she writes about the divorce, which is a metaphorical scar.
But then she gets off topic and has to rewrite the entire thing.
Been there.

Oooh, big juicy gossip! Ivy is dating a high-school sophomore!!!
???
But is she SLEEPING with him? Otherwise, that's only SORT OF creepy.

Uh oh...he was talking about her in the locker room. GROSS.

There's actually not that many cute guys at other schools. I'm pretty satisfied with the ones at mine, but Madison thinks otherwise.

Lance reads his scar story outloud in class, and it turns out Lance has a heart defect!!! For Madison, this explains all his nerdy tendencies.
Yeah. Because heart defects cause a person to be socially challenged.

Hmm, Madison hears Ivy crying in the bathroom. EVEN MORE FORESHADOWING??

?? Madison's mom goes on a date...but doesn't tell Madison what went on.

She still wants her parents to get back together, even though her dad is married now?? It's cool if Stephanie gets hurt and everything....

Aargh, Madison's friends twist the rumor about Ivy and make it sound like she's dating a COLLEGE sophomore!!!! Aargh, they're so mean!!
Drew tells them to leave her alone, and they're all, "Ha ha, you like Ivy!!"

Uh oh. It appears Hart still likes Ivy. All his friends are teasing him about it.
He WAS lying after all.

Journaling #3
Topic: List twenty details about someone you know. Try to include details that are about more than just physical appearance.
Egg asks Madison to read her list outloud...but she can't...because it's about HART.

Egg writes about his sister Mariah, who has blue hair and a nose ring. Jealous.

Fiona writes about Madison, but one of her details is "Bad at keeping secrets".
Ouch.

Since they don't have a science teacher and they can't get a sub, Madison's science class has to work in the library the entire period.
And Madison is stuck with Poison Ivy.
Fuuuun.

Madison doesn't remember Ivy's middle name, which is Renee...
...but Ivy remembers MADISON'S middle name, which is Francesca.
Random.

Turns out Ivy already did all the journaling assignments and asked for more!! Oh, I want some, too.

Madison wants those extra assignments.
But Ivy won't give them to her.
Because Madison never shares her science notes.
Catfight!

Madison peeks into Ivy's journal:
Write about a time you had to wait for something you wanted.
What's the point of writing about this? I am supposed to see M. and H. as soon as possible, but I don't know what will happen. J. didn't have happy....

Madison assumes M and H stand for "Madison" and "Hart".

Bigwheels is sorry, but she doesn't feel comfortable telling Madison what's going on in her life.
Madison retaliates and whines, "You always told me to keep it real. You can talk to me!!"
Someone just wants to know the juicy gossip.
Hello. Problem solve. It has to do with AUTISM.

Madison runs into Hart in the hallway.
Madison: I'm such a klutz. I can't believe I whammed into you like that. I am SO sorry. And now look at this mess....
Hart: My dad would call this a happy accident. He always says profound things like that.
What are you implying??

Uh-oh. Hart might've looked at Madison's journal! There's no telling what he saw!
Hmm, it turns out he might've seen "MADISON JONES" written in huge letters.

Aimee's obsessed with the whole "high school sophomore" thing. "OMG, HIS NAME IS FRED!"

And he apparently got suspended once for using drugs.

Wows. The 4th journaling assignment is to write a description of someone you know, and using inflammatory language, Madison writes a pagelong rant about Poison Ivy.

It turns out Mrs. Daly (Ivy's mom) has breast cancer, too!
It's a small world after all.

Duh. The M and J in the notebook stood for "Mom" and "Janet".

It turns out the high-school sophomore is a member of a cancer support group that Ivy goes to and they're JUST FRIENDS.

Madison doesn't want to be nice to Ivy because her FRIENDS will think she's weird.
You could bring up the CANCER. That might help.

Fran STILL won't tell Madison who she's dating...or whether or not she's dating AT ALL.

Madison accidentally tells her friends about the date, and they're all, "OMG, GOSSIP!"
Madison: No! You guys... This is how rumors get started.
Yeah. Remember the "college sophomore" thing?

Fiona: Walter's cute, and I like him a lot, but he can be really, really embarrassing sometimes.
He's a GUY! Not only that, he's in 7TH GRADE! Of course he's embarrassing!

Drew, the rich kid, brags about his new BASEBALL CARD COLLECTION. He even has an original Honus Wagner card!!!
Um, cool...but what's the point?? It's not like there's anyone to trade with him.

Hart grabs Madison's hand suggestively. ????

Fran doesn't want to wear a red dress on one of her dates, because that would send the WRONG IMPRESSION.
Either this guy is religious or it's not a date.

Dude, it's okay if you lie in your journal. Denial is the first step in processing grief. And it's her PRIVATE JOURNAL. It's not like anyone's going to find out.
And Madison doesn't even CARE about the lies Ivy is writing. She's just jealous that Ivy is in her DOMAIN of journals and collages.

Bigwheels reveals her secret: Her brother Eddie has mild autism.
Now he doesn't like being touched, can't sit still, hit himself in public, and apparently can't talk.
Ooooh...poor Bigwheels.

Madison's like...Oh.

The grades were so bad on the last science quiz that Madison's teacher gave everyone an A!!!!!
Whoa...I wish my science teacher had been that nice. I had the highest grade in the class with a B-!

Just when Madison is about to be nice to Ivy, Ivy has to tell another lie about her perfect life, making Madison "madder than mad".

Fran wasn't going on dates...she was meeting with a bigwig to discuss her promotion!! Soon they'll be rich!

Madison is mad that her mom didn't tell her first, though. After she told everyone else. Including Jeff, the guy she had a kid with.
Yeah, I'd probably tell Jeff first, too.

Argh. Madison's friends start being REALLY mean about Ivy (claiming she's on drugs, making fun of her outfit, etc.), so Madison tells them to quit it.
And...ugh, I hate them so much.
Aimee: Are you defending her?
Madison: no, no! But I just think...that maybe...we're being a little harsh...
Friends: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Madison: What's so funny?
Aimee: Maddie, we're talking about the Queen of Harsh here, Poison Ivy Daly, remember? How could we possibly come near her level of mean?

THAT'S your excuse?? When is it EVER okay to accuse someone of being on drugs??? I freaking HATE Aimee.

Wth, Aimee gets WORSE!!
aIMEE: I just saw her crying outside one of hte bathrooms. Can you believe it? Ivy never cries. She's more like an emotional freezer. She doesn't care about anyone else except herself.
Fiona: What was she crying about?
Aimee: Herself. She ran out of lip gloss. Oooh! Poor me!
B**ch.

Madison does some really LAME defending.
Madison: I think Ivy's got a problem.
Aimee: NO KIDDING!
Fiona: HAHAHAHAHA! [I hate her, too]
Madison: No, you two, I'm serious. I think maybe she has a real problem.
Fiona: You're serious?
Aimee: Like, what problem? What do you know that you aren't telling us?
Madison: I just...I don't know anything for sure. But I just think that maybe Ivy is really sad. Maybe she's not being a drama queen for once.
Fiona: I guess you could be right.
Aimee: Please! I can't stay for the pity party.
For the love of God, Aimee!! Who's an emotional freezer now? She doesn't even care!! And Madison just laughs along with her to the pity party comment.
Is it sad that I'm getting really riled about what a fictional character is saying??
Whatever. She's a STUPID fictional character.

Lo and behold! The girls come upon a lady whose son has autism!

Madison: It's so weird that you saw Mrs. Reynolds like that, because I was just wondering about autism.
Aimee: Huh? You were? Maddie, why were you wondering about that?
Madison: Oh, I don't know, Aim, I saw a TV show on autism once...and I-I've always wondered about it. That's all.
Aimee: That's so random, Maddie.
Dude, holy crap. Is Aimee THAT OBLIVIOUS?? What a crappy friend.

Now that Fran is rich, she takes Madison on a joyous shopping spree.
Dang, my parents are the opposite of rich right now.
Stupid gas prices.

And they run into Paige and Ivy Daly at the mall!! Awkward...
I think Mrs. Daly is bald. That's how I pictured her, anyway.

Awww...Ivy is so sad about her mom.
But she also doesn't want anyone to start treating her like a leper because she has a sick mom.
That's the Ivy we know and love. You were scaring me for a minute there, Ivy.

Omg, Mrs. Daly has an asthma attack! Or something. Does cancer affect the respiratory system, too?

Mrs. Daly just randomly throws her arms around Madison and kisses her on the cheek. WHOA. There's this thing we call "The Bubble". You're not respecting it.

For her last journal assignment, Madison has to write a piece from someone else's point of view, so she writes about Ivy. It's pretty depressing.

Yay, Eddie's made progress! He can talk now!!
Maybe he'll grow up to be like the autistic kids at my school who are really good at spelling.
But that's assuming all autistic kids have some sort of superpower when in fact they're just normal kids...sort of.

Surprise! Hart comes over.
And he ran the entire way???
Ha ha, like in #16. "Are you okay?" "Oh yeah, I have asthma."

Chocolate cookies are overrated.
But both Madison and Hart like them. They have SOOOO much in common!!

Wh-What?
Hart: Are you okay?
Madison: No.
And she tells him all about what's been going on...and he listens??? That's cool.

But then, out of the blue, he's all, "You're really nice." Which makes you wonder if he was really listening.

They agree to "do something"...as in go on a date.

Hart: You know...I should tell you something.
Madison: What?
Hart: Well, do you remember the day when you and I collided at school? And your bag fell apart?
Madison: Yeah?
Hart: Well...I saw your journal that day. I saw what you wrote.
Madison: Saw what?
Hart: I saw my name on that page.

Then he just LEAVES!!! MIXED-MESSAGES!!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN????

But then Fran comes home and says, "Hart run all the way here? He loves you!"
So everything is okay.

Madison's Computer Tip:
If you want to keep your thoughts and feelings secret, don't write them down in a blog.

Well, I obviously DON'T.
Hm, fun fun fun.
The next one takes place in NYC, so it should be sparkly and fun, according to the back cover.
Agh, I started reading #21, which I'd never read before, and it's a little disappointing. But whatever. I'll be here forever, so expect more later.

Happy Fictional Father's Day!!!, or FTFO Madison Finn #18: Give Me a Break

It's Father's Day!! Yay!!! This is the day where I thank God for giving me a father more able than Jeff Finn.
Ironically, Madison Finn #18 involves fathers. Sort of. It's mostly about friendship and superstition, but Jeff takes Madison on a big ski trip, so it's pretty appropriate.
Wth? In the library summary, they make it sound like Madison has to choose between Fiona and Aimee, but Fiona's already going somewhere for the holidays, so picking her isn't even an option.
I highly doubt the person who wrote that read the book.



Plot: Winter Break is here and Madison expects to be bored out of her wits. She is so jealous of her friend, Fiona, who is going to California for the holidays. UNFAIR!!!
Then Jeff Finn has a brilliant idea: why doesn't he take his wife, daughter, and best friend to a 5 star ski resort???? Wouldn't that be fun??
Honestly? Sounds like one of the BSC vacations, where the parents pay for EVERYONE.
Madison is all for it. She grabs Aimee and they head off to Big Mountain (seriously, that's the name.)
Unfortunately, they keep running into bad luck!! On the drive up the mountain, they get TWO flat tires. They also rent a HAUNTED cabin, and get into fights!!
It's just omen after bad omen!!!
Not only that, Aimee is being totally snobby, and Madison blames HER for all the bad luck.
After Madison chooses a cute boy to be her ski partner rather than Aimee, Aimee flies in a jealous rage down the mountain...and sprains her wrist!!
This is either the worst vacation or the best vacation ever.
I'm enjoying it.
Madison is so angry at Aimee. She ruined their vacation!!! Aimee sacrifices TLC and good medical care, however, to let Madison enjoy the slopes for two more days. Wow. She's a good friend...especially since Maddie's such a brat in this one.
Even more bad luck!!! Madison realizes all her superstitions are stupid and breaks down...but Aimee is there to boost her ego and say, "No, all your superstitions aren't dumb! I believe them!"
That way, Amiee has to apologize first and nothing is expected of Madison.
So lame. Anyway, they are friends forever.

More notes:
Fiona wears a lot of purple, specifically the shade "grape".

Egg knocks Devo and Tears for Fears. Jerk.

"The truth was that Aimee, Madison, and Fiona had gone to a few hockey games - and practices, too. Fiona went because her brother was on the team and because she wanted to see Egg in slap-shot action. Madison went to ogle Hart in his ice skates."
Wth? They actually let other students come to practice??? SOOOO prohibited at my school. Lol!! "Oooooh...your ice skates are SOOOOO hot...score another goal..."

Aw, poor Madison and Aimee. Fiona is going to California for winter break!!! Madison and Aimee have to watch hot boys play hockey and work at the Cyber Cafe (for money!!!).

Madison finds a chain letter Aimee receives and FREAKS OUT!! They HAVE to send it to five people or they'll have FIVE YEARS OF BAD LUCK.
Oooo, I'm scared. They send a copy to Poison Ivy.
Why are they so mean to her???

Whaaaat? Maddie might not be into Hart anymore???

LAAAAME. Hart doesn't have the balls to ask her out, and Madison doesn't want to make the first move, either.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought the cute guy next door was named JOSH. Madison seems to think his name is Toby.
Nooooooo. That would be the random high school guy you met in #11 whilst walking your dog.

She reminisces about Mark and how she messed up because she NEVER e-mailed him (but he never exactly e-mailed her, either).

Whoas. How rich is Madison's dad? They're staying in a 5 star resort, and Madison can take her friend AND her dog.

On the last day of school before winter break, all the teachers show movies instead of teaching class.
AS IT SHOULD BE.

Aimee screws up things with Hart. She not only embarasses him, but implies that Maddie should find someone new.
WHY ARE YOU FRIENDS WITH HER, MADDIE?

BIGWHEELS IS SICK AGAIN!!! I bet tomorrow her computer will crash, but as soon as she gets a new one, she'll be grounded, and then when she finally gets to use her e-mail again, she'll be sick.
It's a vicious cycle.

Bigwheels wants to meet Maddie in person.
Aaagh...what if she's really a creepy child molestor!?

Oh no, Madison has no cute ski clothes! She'll be laughed off the slopes!

So far, Madison has a sweatshirt, ski pants, a jacket, and some jeans.
If you never change clothes, that could last you a few days.

"Even though Madison was feeling much more alert, Aimee's high-pitched squeals were still over the top."
I hate morning people.
Agh, my dog woke me up at 6:15 this morning, but when I want to be awake and play with her, she's tired and wants to go to bed.
??? I thought you were a terrier!

They hear the same song on the radio within ten minutes!!
Good omen!!!

Jeff gets lost and refuses to ask for directions.
Here's to Dad's who never ask for directions!! Yaaaay!

Two flat tires!!! And Jeff forgot his AAA card!! They'll never get a tow now!

Stephanie totally chews him out...then pulls out HER AAA card for him to use.
Why didn't you just give it to him in the first place?

Lol. They go to a love calculator website. Those crack me up, but Madison TOTALLY takes them seriously.

Hart and Madison have only a 26% chance of romance!! Say it isn't so!!!

Madison has a better (85%) chance with EGG!!! Ew.

Aimee and Ben have a 74% chance. Ew, I hate them both.

Uh oh. Hart and Ivy have an 81% chance of romance.
Lol. Madison's ideal love connection is Philip Ayres, who sits next to her in math class.
So she types in her and Hart's MIDDLE names and they get an 81% chance, just like Hart and Ivy.
Ew, Hart's middle name is Jefferson???

Oh no, Madison sees a black cat! Bad omen?
Nope. It's just a squirrel.

Aimee makes fun of Hart, because he's a commitmentphobe.
Then again, this is junior high, but getting played kind of sucks.

Lol. The skylights open and it snows in their cabin. Bad omen.
Then again, they now have their own personal ski trail.

NOYCE!!! The resort reimburses them for one night's stay, and pays for their lift tickets AND lunch!!
HOLY CRAP!!
If I'd been there, I would be shoveling snow into my cabin every DAY!!

The manager even sends them APOLOGY BREAKFAST!!! Pastries and yogurt!!! sWeEt!!!

AAargh. Madison spills the salt, screams, and tosses it over her shoulder...which blinds Phinnie for life.

Wth???
"Aimee unzipped her suitcase and took out a perfectly matched outfit - a pair of purple ski pants and an orange fleece pullover. Underneath, she would wear a little shirt with flowers embroidered across the neckline."
Purple and ORANGE??? What about that is MATCHING???? Madison's jealous that Aimee is so "fashionable". I think the appropriate word is "color-blind".

Red pants, a black T-shirt, and a pink hat doesn't work that well, either, but I guess the point is to stay warm.

Oooh, an exotic Spanish ski instructor.
Aimee is in lust.

Aimee: We're here for lessons.
Ski instructor: Are you? Well, I'm the instructor.
Madison: Can we sign up for you?
Aimee: She means, can we register for you and your lessons?
Ski instructor: Certainly. I'm Carlos. Let me get Jennifer. She will help you get signed up.
Mmmmm, Carlos, I want to learn how to ski. Lol.

Aimee totally throws herself at Carlos, but when Madison spazzes out about a piece of strawberry stuck in her teeth, Aimee is all, "He's only the ski instructor, Maddie."
*cough* HYPOCRITE *cough*

Whoas. Stephanie and Dad buy Madison sunglasses, gloves, a ski suit, and a headband.
It would suck to be Aimee in that situation.

Ooh, the ski pants have a bib. Yay, ski overalls!

Oooh, Madison runs into a cute boy named Hugh Jackson.
H...J. Hey, he has the same initials as Hart Jones!

Foster Lane, Aimee's favorite movie star, is at the resort!!!
That would suck if there was a celebrity at your resort...but it was someone you despised, like Tori Spelling.

"When Aimee set her mind to something, she was often successful. Maybe it was a combination of always speaking her mind and batting her eyelashes."

Hugh: freckles, green eyes, blond hair.
In other words, Zac Efron!!!

Jeff gives Madison and Aimee necklaces with a bunny charm. Oh, I get it! Snow bunnies!!! -_-

Ugh, of course, Madison has to go overboard and convince herself that the snow bunny necklace is good luck.

Lol. Aimee takes off the necklace because it doesn't match her outfit. Madison's like, "NOOOO, BAD LUCK, BAD LUCK!"

Stephanie believes in a superstition about sneezing.
One for sorrow, two for joy, three for a letter, four for a boy, five for silver, six for gold, seven for a secret never to be told.
What is that supposed to mean?? And I thought it was seven for DEATH.
Because we were talking about that in math, and then Sam sneezed four times in a row, so Mr. Kovacs was all, "4 sneezes closer to DEATH!" It was pretty hilarious.

LAAAAAME. The waiter tells them a story about Mr. White, who supposedly froze to death outside his cabin. Wait. MADISON'S cabin was once his cabin!!
How is she believing this??? HE'S A WAITER!!!

Stephanie leaves to go to the bathroom when Madison and Aimee start talking about old memories when Maddie's parents were still together, and Madison flips out at Aimee. "Why did you start talking about my mom!!1?? It made Stephanie cry!!"

Aagh. Aimee blows up at Madison, and understandably so.
Owl: Hoooo hoooo hoooo.
Madison: Oh no! THree times! Bad luck!
Aimee: Huh? Three what? Maddie, stop obsessing about your stupid superstitions!
Madison: What do you mean, stupid?
Aimee: I mean, can you please stop being so neurotic for five minutes and just go back to sleep?
Madison: Neurotic? Quit acting like you know everything.
Aimee: What do you mean by that? I don't know everything. Who said I knew everything?
Madison says some nasty stuff about Aimee's ballet ability, and Aimee snaps back.
Girls....

Aimee and Stephanie have a special bonding time.
I would be soooo jealous.

Lol. Madison fell asleep on her bunny charm and it made a HUGE indent in her face.

Madison writes Bigwheels and complains about how slutty Aimee is and how much she's CHANGED.
Um, isn't Aimee flirty ALL THE TIME?? And you go for older guys, too, Madison, so don't be mean to your best friend.

Hmm, Hugh lives in Reston, which is close to Far Hills. Love Connection!
Isn't Reston that town where the Sandy girl in Pony Pals #19 was moving??
Sorry.

Madison tells Aimee she's acting like Poison Ivy.
I think spending time with Poison Ivy would be preferable to listening to Madison moan.

Lol. Aimee has to be partners with some girl...but Madison is partners with Hugh.

Then Aimee gets mad when Madison won't switch partners. Hello, hot guy, more important than friendship, obviously.

Hugh: Your friend looks bummed. You should ski with her.
Madison: I do everything with her. I would rather ski with you.
Whoa, Maddie. How positively bold of you.

Aimee falls down the mountain!!!!! No lie!!!

How would a broken wrist prevent you from dancing in a ballet recital?? I want to know.

At least it's only a sprain...but it will be in a cast for 4 weeks. Ouch.

Madison is so selfish. Her best friend just hurt her wrist and needs to go home, and the only thing Madison cares about is her vacation.

Argh. Madison is convinced the accident happened because neither girl wore their ski bunny charm.

Bad timing. Gramma Helen, not knowing about Aimee's accident, sends Madison an e-mail that says, "Don't fall of the mountain!"

Fiona e-mails about her brother Chet's sprained foot and complains about how she can't do ANYTHING now. Hello, your BROTHER sprained his foot, not you. Just ditch him and go have fun. You're in CALIFORNIA!

Heeeeey...Drew's gf's name is ELAINE, not Emily. Unless he broke up with Elaine and started going out with a new girl...whose name ALSO happens to begin with E.

Aw. Aimee decides to stay so Madison can enjoy her vacation.
Madison totally does NOT thank her best friend.

Ooh, Madison puts on MAKEUP to impress Hugh. Lol. If only she knew what was coming.

They practice on a slope called Four-Leaf Clover.
Good omen!

Ewwww, root beer.

They ask if CARLOS, the 25-year-old Spanish ski instructor, will be Aimee's true love. Yeah, I see that happening.

Yay, the chain letter worked!! Ivy got gum in her hair!! So mean.

I hate people that only apologize when the other person did. Aimee says she believes in superstitions and that she's sorry for almost ruining the vacation because she was dumb (the accident was NO accident; she was just showing off). Madison apologizes, but doesn't specify what she's sorry about. Meaning she's not really sorry. -_-

OH NO! Hugh can't ski with Madison anymore! He'd rather go skiing with his friends and parents, and ski demos are lame anyway.

Madison freaks out!! She acts like they were dating or something, when, in actuality, they've known each other 2 days. Totally overreacting.

AND overdramatic. "I'm...all...alone!!! *sob*"

To show Madison she is a good friend, Aimee wears her snow bunny necklace, which restores Madison's faith in good and bad luck and omens and so forth.

They met Foster Lane, but Madison doesn't think he is cute because he has acne.
It's not like people CHOOSE to have acne. My brother has it, and my friends are always asking all slyly, "Mmmm, who's he??" It's creepy. And weird.

"Maybe everything happened so we could see that the best lucky charm was with us all along--each other."
GAG! This isn't "Sesame Street".

Lol. Madison and Aimee play that apple game where you twist off the stem and poke through the skin. Aimee gets WD, for Walter Diaz!!! But he's supposed to be Madison's "true love"? Oh well.
Madison gets HJ, and is like, "Oh no, not Hugh!" Um, duh. Hart Jones.

WHOA. As soon as Madison gets home, Hart IMs her and asks if she would like to go skating with him. Well, him, and all their friends, but still.
Okay, and it WAS on IM, but it's a start.

Madison's Computer Tip:
The Internet is a great place to search for trends, fashion tips, and other ideas about what's hot - and in my case, what's not.

Fun, fun, fun. The next book is more serious, and a little lamer, as Madison takes out her frustrations on Poison Ivy. It's like permanent PMS or something. Hopefully she'll be better by #20.

Way to give away the end, or FTFO Madison Finn #15: Off the Wall

Don't you hate it when the library has every book in a series...
...except the one you need???
I'm trying to find a stupid picture of this book, and my library site, of course, doesn't have this one.
You know what sucks? I ordered a BUNCH of Madison Finns that I've never read, and I'm not going to be able to read them, because I'm trying to do this in series order!!! Aaargh!



Plot: Something is very, very wrong in Far Hills. Madison's favorite teacher, Mrs. Wing, has gone missing!!! She and her husband have just up and left, without leaving a note or anything!
Madison is worrieder than worried.
If that wasn't enough, Aimee's dog Blossom is about to have puppies...with another bassett hound! See, Madison and Aimee made a pact in fourth grade that had something to do with Phin and Blossom having puppies together. It appears Aimee has broken the pact!!
To get her mind off things, Madison checks out a web Egg reccomended to her called "The Wall". The Wall is full of juicy gossip, AKA heaven for 7th grade girls.
Oh no! Someone starts posting nasty things about Madison's friends...and it looks like Madison is to blame! Will Fiona, Aimee, and Lindsay ever talk to her again?
After a little bit of digging, Madison finds out the culprit is none other than Ivy herself (saw it coming).
To get back at the fiend, she writes a very nasty message about Ivy and posts it on The Wall.
Afterwards, she is racked with guilt and tells her parents everything.
They help her take down the message...and then ground her and take away her computer for a month.
OUCH.
Fiona, Aimee, and Lindsay apologize to Madison for not believing her, and everything is rosy once more.
Oh yeah, Madison forgets about the puppies, and Mrs. Wing, it turns out, left to adopt a baby!! Yay!! Sunshine and flowers!!

More notes:
Why are school computers always so slow?

Lance has a crush on Madison, but she is repulsed by his nose-picking and cheerful, "Howdy"s.

The new computer substitute is cool, lol.
"Holy cow! It took me a century to find you cats."

Mrs. Wing leaves Madison in charge...because she's the class expert.
How embarrassingly flattering.

Egg: Get out of here. I would whomp you.
"Whomp" you?? Wth?? Who says that?

Madison and Aimee "enjoy" watching Fiona and Chet's fights.
Enjoy??? What's to enjoy? Those are so awkward!

There is no way boys gossip more than girls.
But they do gossip quite a bit.

Egg sings The Wall's praises, because there aren't any moderators.
RED FLAG! RED FLAG!

There are a buttload of rules that nobody's going to follow WITHOUT MODERATORS.

Aimee IMs Maddie to tell her about the puppies.
But when they get to the part about there being a dad OTHER than Phin, Madison just signs off.
That's always nice.

Madison is such a drama queen! "My best friend has betrayed me."
They're just puppies! And it's not like you shook on the whole puppy plan.
Yeah, the whole "puppy plan" consisted of a bunch of jokes on how ugly Blossom and Phin's puppies would be.

SHE EVEN ADMITS IT! "It was like a dream of mine. I know we didn't make a formal pact or anything, but isn't a friend's word supposed to count for something?"

Dude, I looked these kinds of puppies up online, and they're adorable!!! Just go online and look up "Bassugg puppies".

Dan: Maddie! I'm so glad you're here. I could use your help big-time.
Madison: I'm glad you're here, too. It's been a bad day. I need cheering up.
Dan: Try cleaning up dog poop and cat poop. That'll cheer you up real fast.
Oh, Dan, you charmer you.

THe conversation takes an awkward turn when Madison mentions "those naked-looking cats".
Dan: *giggle* Naked?
Madison: *blush of death* So, um, about my problems....

Dan thinks Madison should chill out and not be so mad at Aimee.
He also thinks Dr. Wing and Mrs. Wing ran away together, but hey.

Madison's Dad wants to go out to dinner with Stephanie's nephew Kirk.
Madison thinks Kirk will probably be a dork.
And, of course, he's no Hart Jones.

Madison's Excuses for not dining with Kirk:
I have the walk the dog.
I have to wash my hair.
I have to save the world from an alien attack.
This probably spoils everything, but Kirk, in later books, turns out to be a way cute Kountry Gentleman.
Poor, poor Madison.

Yay, "Number the Stars"! That's one of my favorite books!!

Ivy is so evil!!
Ivy: I don't see what the big deal is. I mean, I didn't really fail the test. I only got a D, you know. Mr. Danehy is such a pain.
Joan: Science is so dumb anyway.
Ivy: And if that stupid twit Madison had just sat differently, I could have cheated off her paper, anyhow. She's such a goody-goody.
Joan: You'll pass science.
Ivy: Who really cares? I can always copy Madison's lab notes anyway. I do it all the time when she isn't looking.

Mrs. Wing adopted a baby...and Madison was the last one to know.
Been there, done that.
Meaning I've been the last to know. No, I haven't adopted a baby recently. The last baby I met yelled, "Poop," at me and threatened to beat me up if I spoke again.

Someone who goes to FHJH writes a post about Mrs. Wing on the wall. Maddie is like, "Nooo, everyone knew before me!!"
Someone replies to the post: So what, who cares?
Yeah, really, who cares? My teachers get pregnant all the time.

Aimee and Fiona are so stupid!!! They both post on a board called "Hotties" using their REAL SCREENNAMES!!! Now everyone will know it's them!
Posted by: BalletGrl
Date: 5 Nov
Message: actually I like this guy Ben but no one really knows so shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I should not have written that
Why would you write it if you didn't want anyone to know???
Posted by: Wetwinz
Date: 5 Nov
Message: of course someone who has been flirting w/me a lot wink wink can u guess who? *G*

Aimee sees the humor in the puppy situation.
Aimee: Maddie! I told you that about the puppies when we were in, like, fourth grade! And besides, my mom and dad are the ones who decide who Blossom will have puppies with, not me. And they want basset hounds, not some mix of pug and...Maddie, can you imagine what Blossom and Phin's babies would really look like?
Uh, yeah...they would be SOOO CUTE!

Fiona: By the way, I heard some big news.
Madison: Yeah, yeah, big news, I know. Mrs. Wing had a baby.
Fiona: Huh? What are you talking about? A baby? She did?
Madison: Wait. You didn't know?
Fiona: MRS. WING HAD A BABY? Oh, wow! This is, like, HUGE news. My news is so little and puny compared to yours. I just found out that the soccer team is moving their practice space. Wow! How did you find about Mrs. Wing?
So it turns out Madison isn't the last one to know, but come on, Fiona!! The soccer team is moving their practice space??? WHAT KIND OF NEWS IS THAT???

Oooh, lucky. Madison's school has free period instead of study hall.

Someone posts a REALLY mean message about Lindsay!!
Posted by: LoVeBuG
Date: Nov 6
Message: there is ms. fatty in my class and she is SOOOO fat that she cant even go 2 regular camp LOL she has to go to FAT CAMP and she walks around with a dumb black haircut & purple backpack that looks like she should be in the first grade LOSER!!! I feel bad 4 her yah right NOT FHJH would be better w/o her :)
That's pretty mean, but I thought Lindsay had light brown hair. She even has some on the cover.

Lindsay now wants all of her friends to stop going on the site.
It may be disloyal, but...
...I'd probably keep going on The Wall if I were Madison.
Which she does.

Lindsay: I bet it was the guys. I know they make fun of me because I'm overweight. I heard them once.
Madison: You did?
Lindsay: Yeah. I heard Hart and Chet talking once about who was the prettiest in our class.
Madison: Hart and Chet?
Fiona: What did they say, exactly? My brother is such a geek. Don't listen to him!
Lindsay: I don't remember everyone they were talking about, but I do know they said Ivy was the hottest girl and that some other girls were okay but some were too fat, like me and Beth Sanders.
[!!!!!!!!!!! THAT IS SO MEAN!!! Proof that guys suck.]
Fiona: Well, Lindsay. Beth Sanders is fat. She's huge. She takes up two seats at lunch. You're not fat like that.
[I lied, girls suck, too. ESPECIALLY FIONA.]
Madison: That's not the point, guys.
Thank you, Madison.

Lol.
"Madison knew the truth. They would all huff and puff and complain about how terrible it was to post gossip. And then they'd each go home that very night and check the next postings on the gossip page - just in case something interesting came up."

Some people just suck at math. Video games have nothing to do with that.

Madison's Dad reads the Lindsay post outloud, and it sounds kind of funny when he says it.
"What does that text say? 'Fat camp'? 'Looks like she should be in the first grade LOSER'? What is this? This isn't an e-mail from one of your friends, is it?"

Dad thinks girls are meaner than boys.
So true.

Fiona has big news!!!
Fiona: Okay, so he finally, really asked me.
Madison: Asked you? What? Who?"
Fiona: Egg! He asked me out. For real.
Madison: He asked you out? He said those exact words.
Fiona: He wants to go to the movies next week. Can you believe it? I know we're sort of a 'couple', but this really makes a difference
AARGH, NO!! You're not officially a "couple" until he asks you out.
Otherwise, he's just playing you.
I can't believe it's been this long and he JUST NOW asked her out.
Egg's a playa....

Whoa, Madison stands up to Ivy in this one! And it's really funny!
Madison: You obviously don't know the meaning of the word homework, Ivy. It means you actually have to do work, at home.
Ivy: Well, YOU obviously don't understand what it means to be partners, Madison. It means that occasionally you show me your notes. I would do the exact same for you.
Madison: Yeah. If you ever took notes.
Ivy: Excuse me?
Madison: Look, Ivy, I have to go. Why don't you just ask Mr. Danehy for help?
PWNED!!

Why is Fiona so overdramatic??
Fiona: Maddie, I can't believe you!
Madison: What happened?
Fiona: You promised you wouldn't tell!!
Madison: Fiona...
Fiona: I thought you were my friend. How could you?
Madison: Please tell me what's wrong.
Fiona: Why don't you read The Wall? You'll see what I'm talking about, Maddie. You'll see.

Posted by: MF13
Date: 8 Nov
Message: some secrets r way 2 hard 2 keep even about my friends F.W. sez its all god but she and W.D. probably want to hook up @ the movies next week I know it what a j-o-k-e they are so NOT innocent :)
:O Okay, "Madison" basically called Fiona a slut, but Fiona seems more mad that "Madison" told her secret.
Yeah, you should keep your friends' secrets, but what's secret about being asked out?? Wouldn't you be happy? Wouldn't you WANT to share the news with everyone? I mean, you're already "a couple", right???
So, even though I know Madison didn't write this, she shouldn't have told the secret, but WHY WAS IT A SECRET IN THE FIRST PLACE?

Um, duh. Egg told everyone. Big surprise.

Madison thinks it might be Chet, then feels bad and insists they shouldn't do anything.
Why would Chet do that...AND use Madison's scrnnme? Confused.

Madison wants to know if Dan ever made up a fake screenname for himself.
Who hasn't?? No offense, Maddie, but MadFinn kind of sucks.

Aimee has a secret, too! She might get a lead in the next ballet production!
$100 it'll be on The Wall tomorrow.

Madison's gym shorts are sort of tight and Ivy makes fun of them.
I thought tight things were in?? Ivy's just jealous.

Hehehe, Madison gets paired up with Ivy for volleyball.
Ivy: I despise volleyball.
That makes two of us.
Madison: You just despise everything and everyone.
Heheheheheh.

Madison finds a bulletin about Aimee on the wall...supposedly posted by herself. Instead of calling Aimee about it, she retreats to her files to be emo???
Whatever. Aimee will be calling to yell at you in like 2 minutes anyway.

Aimee and Madison have a fight. Aimee drags up stuff from the past, about all the times Madison has lied (she's only lied once). Aimee sort of sucks.

Lol.
As Aimee's leaving, she turns around and screams, "THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING!"

Egg thinks Fiona is stupid for being mad at Madison.
Go Egg!

Ivy gets "gravity" and "relativity" mixed up.
.....

Heh. Ivy and Madison have to do a science project together...and Madison makes Ivy do all the work. Payback.

Ivy: What did you find in the back?
Madison: No much. We should do more research upstairs in the media center, thought. Can you go look after school?
Ivy: Me? Why don't you go look after school.
Madison: I have an after-school conflict today.
Ivy: Well, I have a conflict, too. Like, I don't do science work after school. That's my conflict.
Madison: Maybe we should each write our own paper. I can ask Mr. Danehy if we can split-
Ivy: NO! Okay, I'll look in the media center. Don't throw a hissy about it. Gosh, you always overreact. What a drama queen.
GO MADISON!!

Mr. Danehy gives Ivy an F!!
Today is not Ivy's day.

Ugh, I hate it when people read over my shoulder!!!
Lance is a creepy kid.

Mrs. Wing brings her baby Phoebe to school.

Lance: My cousin had a big, fatso baby. He was so huge, he looked like he was stuffed.
Thanks, Lance.

Boys like babies, too.

It seems like Bigwheels is always either sick or grounded.
"SORRY I wasn't on my computer, but I was SICK and GROUNDED at the SAME TIME."

"Friends are forever, boys are whatever!"
What if all your friends are boys??

Madison wants revenge.
Noooo, don't do it, Madison! Revenge is never the answer!!

Madison writes a post about Ivy.
Posted by: MF13
Date: 11 Nov
Message: More big newz @ FHJH this time its I.D. in trouble wow is she ever. The WITCH is failing science. Yeah I.D. begged Mr. D. to pass her but he said no way so now the school is planning to EXPEL her...it is soooo bad Not only that but I heard that NO other school in the district wants to accept her b/c she has no real friends n e way LOL in fact there r no guys who will even look @ her b/c she dresses

That's as far as she gets before she accidentally publishes it.
Okay, who would even believe that? The part about having no friends and being a slut is pretty mean, but she wouldn't get EXPELLED for failing science.
Duh. Summer school.

Madison has become a pathological liar.

The bulletin won't be removed for 24 hours.
You sort of deserve it, Madison.
Revenge is never the answer.

"Now...Ivy will probably read what I posted and...she'll hate me forever and..."
"Wait just a minute, Maddie. I thought you and Ivy weren't friends anymore anyway."
Yeah!! What do you care what she thinks??
Shouldn't you be more worried about hurting her feelings than how she'll think of you? Because I'm pretty sure she already hates you.

Madison: Why are parents always right? And why am I always wrong?
Trust me, honey. Parents are NOT always right.

Lol, her dad is so delightfully evil.
"You're kidding! Oh, Maddie, you are most definitely going to tell your mother everything, from the beinning. We had a deal."
That's like on "Dan in Real Life".
"So Marty can stay?"
"*hysterical laughter* Marty can STAY???"

Madison can never go on The Wall again.
She is officially Off the Wall (that's where the title comes in).
Wait, MF13 is the one who's not allowed on the wall.
Madison could just create a new screename and go on whenever she wanted.

WtH???????
Lindsay, Aimee, and Fiona came over to apologize.
Why the sudden epiphany??
And why is Lindsay apologizing, too???
Madison had nothing to do with her Fat Camp thing!!! Lindsay probably didn't even know about the whole fight until now.
WHAT IS SHE DOING THERE??

It turns out Ivy told Hart she was MF13, and Hart told Chet who told Fiona.

Boys aren't the only shallow ones.
Such as girl on basketball team??
"Lauren, you'd be really pretty if you did this to your hair."
Um...thanks.

NICE!!! Madison's mom took away her laptop and is keeping it under lock and key in her desk drawer!!! Madison can only use it for one hour each day to check her e-mail!!
Finally! Good parenting!

Madison is super mean to Lance...even if he is a nerd.
Madison: I'm outta here.
Lance: But I just got here.
Madison: So? See you in class tomorrow.
Duh, Lance, you're the reason she's leaving.

Ivy: I'm never going to forget, you know.
Madison: Elephants never forget.
Ivy: Who are you calling.... OOOOOH! You think you're sooooo smart, don't you?
Madison just smiles and walks away.
The one time turning the other cheek actually WORKED.

Bigwheels is grounded because she told some kids a scary story.
Whatever. I bet it was the one about the finger.

Ew, I hate youngest children.

Madison's Computer Tip:
Beware of online gossip.

Truer words were never spoken.
I just read the last 2 Pony Pals books, and they were surprisingly enjoyable and kind of sad. Lulu's dad SUCKS; he's probably the worst father ever. So does Mrs. Crandal. It's like good parents don't EXIST in Wiggins. But that's all tomorrow; I have stuff to do.

What is this, second grade?, or FTFO Madison Finn #14: Double Dare

I've been hiding from the sun, I'm tired of being afraid of everything and everyone.
I'm so tiiiired.
Sorry. Musically bingeing on Atreyu.
Madison Finn!! What what?



Plot: Junior high has never been more insane. Mrs. Wing brings to Madison's attention a computer contest!! Students have two weeks to create a homework helper website with a partner; the winner will receive a brand new computer.
Madison is itching to enter...but her computer-savvy friend Egg has another partner in mind.
No worries, mate! Madison picks Fiona as her partner and the two put together a splendiferous little website.
However, the competition with Egg is fierce. It gets so bad that Egg and Madison have a huge fight!!! Egg wants to log off as a friend - forever!!! (Lol, that was on the back of the book, and I just had to add it)
To add to all her worries, Fiona's mom has asked Madison and Aimee to help plan a surprise party for Fiona and Chet - and their birthday is in a week!
Aimee and Madison invite all the right people, make delicious cakes, and throw a pretty ballin party.
Egg and Madison make up.
Neither team wins the computer contest, but both teams receive an honorable mention.

More notes:
It's September again...and they acknowledge that it's been a year since Chet and Fiona moved to Far Hills....
BUT THEY'RE ALL STILL IN SEVENTH GRADE!!!

Two weeks to design a website. That's pretty...ridonkulous.

Oooh, third prize is $50 and a subscription to Computer Universe! Nerds.

Egg already has a partner; he's doing the contest with Chet.
Madison. Has. Been. BETRAYED.
Okay, yeah, it sucks, but you MOVE ON, Maddie. She's just mad because he didn't pick her FIRST.

Drew is standing in the hallway and Madison leaps on him right after Egg ditches her. "Will you be my partner, Drew?"
Drew already has a partner, too. Ha ha ha.
"She'd been rejected twice - and it wasn't even lunch yet."

Fiona and Ivy are still friends???? But she's been here for a year???
DOES SHE NOT REMEMBER ALL THAT WHEN ON IN BOOKS 1-13???

Madison is sort of stupid.
Fiona: Maddie? Are you entering that computer contest?
Madison: What? What did you say?
Fiona: My brother, Chet, told me about the contest last night. He told me that he's doing it with Egg. [WHOA. INNUENDO.] Like he even has a chance! [MORE INNUENDO.] I mean, it sounds way more like your thing than his- [WHAAAAAT??????]
Madison: Thanks. I just wish I had someone to enter the contest with me.
Fiona: Um...hello?

Uh oh. Egg dares Madison to enter. No, wait, he DOUBLE dares her!!!! She can't chicken out now!!!

Madison looks up homework on the internet: 1,321,395 hits.
Way to be specific. Now you'll never find what you're looking for.

Oh no!! Madison calls Fiona to discuss their plans for the website...AND CHET ANSWERS.
So she hangs up!!! Aaargh, so annoying.

Emily Waters asks Madison and Aimee to help plan Fiona and Chet's birthday.
"Usually I have a special dinner just for family, but I thought that it might be fun to include some of Chet's and Fiona's friends this year."
Yeah, what a concept. Wait, have they seriously never had a "just friends" birthday party? That's sad. Now wonder they hate their birthday.

So they're writing out the guest list, and Aimee's all, "Ugh, I hate huge parties. Let's only invite 4 people."
????? Hello???? It's not your party!!!

Seriously!! She only wants to invite Egg and Drew!!!

Aimee starts spazzing out in front of Fiona.
"Fiona! Hi! How's it going? Is that a new shirt? You look so great in green!"
-_-

Fiona: So, where's the party?
Aimee: Did you say 'party'? We were just talking about the VTV Ultimate Party Video Countdown on Saturday. Do you want to come over and watch it with us?
Fiona: Sorry - I think I've got some family birthday stuff that night.
Aimee: Oh, right, Saturday's your birthday. *jabs Madison*
Madison: *cough* It's your birthday? *starts hacking up the lung Aimee just popped*
Fiona: Of course! I just told you about it the other day. I swear, Maddie, sometimes you can be such a space case!
ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? SHE BOUGHT IT???

Ew, you know Ben, Aimee's lover???
He reminds me of this kid at my school who, while smart, totally gets on everybody's nerves with how cocky he is.
And he wears pajama pants, like, all the time!!
I bet Ben wears pajama bottoms, too.

Wait...weren't Egg and Fiona going out in book #12?
They still acknowledge Fiona's crush on him...but not the fact that they were GOING OUT.

Madison: I just wish we could figure out who to ask. Aimee wants to keep it small - just us, Drew, and Egg. But I think we should invite a few more people.
Fran: Just remember that it's a party for Fiona and Chet - not for you and aimee. And you should be inviting their friends, not just yours.
She makes it seem like it's all Madison's fault.

Aimee doesn't like Ben Buckley anymore. He's too obnoxious.

Fiona finds the guest list in Madison's notebook!!!
And thinks it's a list of competitors in the computer contest!!!
Fiona is an idiot!!!

Madison: *after a brief altercation with Chet and Egg* Way to go, Fiona! You sure told him.
Fiona: Was I too harsh?
Madison: I'm sure Chet will get over it.
Fiona: Chet? Who cares about Chet? I'm talking about Walter Was I too rude? What does he think of me now?

I think Madison has a crush on Mrs. Wing. There's always a billion descriptions of her drooling over Mrs. Wing's cool clothes and beautiful hair.

She tells Egg about the surprise party...even though he has one of the biggest mouths in Far Hills. Smart.

Heh. Drew keeps popping up everywhere, like he used to when he was stalking Madison.

Mwahaha. Aimee doesn't get to dictate the guest list anymore.

Madison is SUCH A SPAZ. "OMG, EGG, DON'T TELL CHET! DON'T TELL CHET, EGG! WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO CHET?? DID YOU TELL HIM!? EGG!!!"

Hart: Hey, Finnster. How are you?
Madison: Oh, not much.
Stupid pheromones.

Egg makes up a lie about going in-line skating on Saturday - the day of the party. Hart wants to come, and Maddie gets so excited that she forgets it's a lie!

Hart wants to give Madison his e-mail address, and Madison can't exactly tell him she kept (and memorized) it.

Teachers don't give students presents.
Okay, they do. My 7th grade LAR/SS teacher gave me a duck pin.

Egg told everybody.
Haha, not. But he did tell Aimee...who already knew. No harm done.

Interesting analogy:
Friendship is like a peanut-butter sandwich. Sometimes it's good, and sometimes it's just plain sticky.

WHY does Fiona still like Ivy?
"I think Fiona still likes Ivy...although why is a mystery to me. She'll learn soon enough about Ivy's true colors."
I thought she already HAD.

THE BIG FIGHT
Chet: What're you hiding there? Your Web page?
Madison: None of your business.
Egg: Madison doesn't like to share.
Madison: Well, sometimes it's good to keep your mouth shut. Maybe you ought to practice that, Walter.
Egg: You're supposed to talk about things with your friends, Maddie.
Madison: What's THAT supposed to mean?
Egg: Forget.
Madison: No, really. Tell me. I want to know.
Egg: Why won't you tell us what you're working on with Fiona? What's the big secret about your stupid WEb page? Are you afraid we'll steal your ideas, or something?
[Okay, can I just break in and say how HYPOCRITICAL THAT IS? He's the one who made a big deal about secrecy in the first place. Loser.]
Mr. Books: Ms. Finn, I suggest that you and your friends keep your voices down. I like quiet in my library.
Egg: Sorry, but it doesn't matter, because Chet and I were just leaving.
Mr. Books: Very well. *leaves*
Chet: That guy acts so strange sometimes!
Egg: He's not the only one!!!

Fiona saw Chet's secret Web page! It's really flashy with a cool song...but it takes forever to load.

Fiona randomly says the word "birthday" twice and Madison is like, "COULD SHE KNOW??? COULD SHE KNOW???"

She gets RSVPs from all the guests...and INSTANTLY thinks they're e-mails saying the guests can't come.
Pessimist.

Ew, Lindsay Frost's screenname is Luvnstuff.

Mrs. Waters' name was EMILY in the beginning of the book. In a thank-you note to Madison and Aimee, she signs her name, "HELEN WATERS". Hello?

Ooh, Madison gets a cool RSVP from Hart:
You are totally gonna surprise them. I'll be there 4 sure. Coolness!
I really like the invitation, BTW.
Hart

Hehehe. 4 sure. Coolness!!

Hehehehe. Do Chet and Fiona like chocolate? Stupid question.

"'Hi, Mom,' Madison said. 'Just talking to myself.'"
First sign of madness.

Jeff (Dad) wants to know why Maddie and Egg are fighting, and Madison is all, "Why don't you just listen? I don't want to talk about it! Just leave me alone, Dad! Go on another business trip or something, why don't you?"
Geez, what's your problem?

Fiona wants Madison to apologize to Egg, and Madison's all, "I shouldn't have to, because he didn't pick me as a partner, and then he turned this project into a DOUBLE DARE!!!" What is this, second grade?

Her Dad ended up going on a business trip. Burn.

Aimee's on another diet.
The Bulimia diet? I hope that one works better than your previous Anorexia diet.

Aimee can't spell "Fiona".

Ivy sends a hilarious RSVP to the birthday e-vite:
Nice invitation, Madison. I didn't know you knew how to use a JPEG.
Of course I'm coming to the party - I know it won't be any fun for you without your seventh-grade Class President. Besides, someone has to be there to make sure Fiona has a good time. TTFN!
Ivy

Aimee: I tried to warn you. Remember what she did at your third-grade birthday party?
Madison: Don't remind me.
Aimee: I gave you that poster book, and she grabbed it and totally hogged it.
Madison: Oh, right! She kept kissing that singer's photo all night. She kept saying that he was her boyfriend and wouldn't let anyone else look at it. I remember!
What's wrong with that? That's all we did at my birthday parties. I think...

Chet and Egg's site sounds so amazing!! It's Star Wars themed with a bunch of science games, and they give video reviews of each site!!!

But it takes forever to load. Ooooh.

Mrs. Wing likes Fiona and Madison's better...because it's fully functional and has cute rhymes.

Good news: Fiona doesn't know anything about the party.
Bad news: On Saturday, she already has plans!!! Her parents are taking her and Chet to see some old college friends.
Gee, you don't think her parents are lying to cover up the surprise party, do you?

Duh. Mrs. Waters was totally lying. The party is still on.

Omg, strawberry-kiwi smooch!! I remember making fun of Madison every time she put that on.

Madison gets Chet a bunch of NBA screensavers, because he likes basketball.
Sounds like a stereotype to me...

She makes Fiona a collage box.
Oh well, I guess it's the thought that counts.

Hahahaha, Madison is about to leave the house for the party...
...and FIONA comes over!
Her parents are driving her crazy, apparently.
"Dad keeps freaking out about my shoes. For some reason, he won't let me wear sandals - he keeps saying that I have to wear shoes with socks. I mean, what's that all about? Are his college friends afraid of feet, or something?"
MWAHAHA, if only you knew, Fiona!!

Madison's holding the presents in her hands, and Fiona's like, "Are those for me?"
Madison: *blink blink* *stutter* Uh...uh...I'm going to a party. It's actually my mom who's going to the party. A friend from Budge Films. I'm just going with her.
Fiona buys it. That's just sad.

Lindsay Frost is so nerdy. She's a pro bowler and has her own bag, shoes, and ball, all in a delightful shade of neon green.

Ben Buckley is a nerd, too. "Bowling is all about angles. If you strike the first pin at the right angle, all the rest will fall."
Have fun with that, Ben.

Ivy shows up wearing a miniskirt...from Paris.
Drew: Um, Ivy...what are you wearing?
Ivy: Duh. It's a miniskirt. What's the matter - you've never seen one before?
Rose: It's from Paris. [Totally saving that for future reference.]
Drew: Yeah. Well...good luck with that.
Hehehe, I love Drew.

Hart almost ruins the surprise by getting there late!!! Boooooo!

Surprise!! The twins are surprised...and stupid.

Since when do people actually keep score for bowling? Doesn't the machine just do it for you?

Madison has to tell Hart her middle name. How embarassing??? It's just a name!!!

Ew, Dan loves Elvis. Sort of don't love Dan as much anymore.

Hart, Egg, Lindsay, and Joanie are apparently superb bowlers.

Hehehe, Ivy can't bowl without mooning her entire team.

Rather than trade in her strappy sandals for bowling shoes, Ivy claims she sprained her finger...and EVERYONE believes her. UGH, she is such a liar.

For people who are "just friends", Egg and Madison exchange a lot of secret smiles in this book.

I hate people that call really early or late. Just saying. Fiona is an early bird.

Madison has apparently learned a few things:
1. When planning a party for two people, you should probably consider what they want.
2. Flash graphics are overrated. Lame graphics rock the house.
3. PMS is no excuse for getting in fights.

Madison and her dad have this touching Father-Daughter talk.
Not.

Followed by a REALLY awkward conversation between Madison and Egg.
Egg: It's hard, isn't it?
Madison: Hard? Yeah.
Egg: It's so much work. Sometimes you think it isn't worth it - that you should just give up...
Madison: But you don't.
Egg: Yeah.
WHAT ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT???

Egg admits that Chet was a lame partner and he should've picked Madison. Whatever.

"You know, Maddie, you're like my best friend who is a girl. But, in a lot of ways, you're also my best any friend."
Ooooh. That sort of made me smile.

Fiona, Egg, Madison, and Chet all get honorable mentions. Because if they didn't win, what would be the point?

Uh oh, Egg double dares Madison to stand up in front of all the clapping people. She can't turn this dare down!!!

Madison's Computer Tip:
Sometimes e-mail can be the most creative way to say hello - or even invite someone to a party!

I actually started this post a week ago, but never really had the time to sit down and finish it till today. Pony Pals #38 sometime this week...should be fun.

I require your opinion on a matter most grevious in nature.

Should I write some fanfic? I'm going to whether you like it or not, but there's the matter of posting it on the internet (or more specifically, this blog) if any of you would be interested in reading it. It would be a parody, of course, and will hopefully be better than a certain soap of mine.
I don't know.
I did make a poll. Oh, how democratic.
Just travel on over to the little box on the right...ON THE RIGHT...ON THE RIGHT...just making sure.
I'm partly only writing this post because I don't want to post anything right now. I'm sort of bored.
And I really want to read the third Maximum Ride book.
And the second Gossip Girl book.