Thou shalt not steal, or Pony Pals #20: Stolen Ponies

I do not understand this book. If someone steals your property, the "right thing" to do would be do turn them in, right?? Aaargh.



Plot: The Pony Pals have a secret hideout. It's just so secretly secret that no one will find it.
While hanging out at the Pony Pal Lodge (their lame name for their secrety secret hideout), they see a campfire left burning in the woods. *gasp* FOREST FIRES! They put it out, and are proud of themselves for saving the whole woods.
This happens repeatedly throughout the book.
After much investigation, the Pony Pals discover it was Tommy and Mike who were starting the fires! *gasp* THAT'S ILLEGAL! (didn't know that little tidbit....) They write Tommy and Mike aa anonymous threatening letter that warns them to never light another fire ever again.
But Tommy and Mike figure out it's them and set their secrety secret hideout on fire.
And then THEY STEAL THEIR PONIES!!!
This has gone a little too far, it seems.
It's raining and the brook is overflowing, but the Pony Pals go looking for their ponies anyways. Anna then sees them on the other side of the river/brook/stream and distracts Tommy and Mike while Lulu and Pam save the day. Pam wants to call the police, but Anna and Lulu convince her this is the wrong way to go. After all, they've only broken two laws and destroyed their property. Jail is not where these boys belong.
So the Pony Pals tattle to the Park Ranger and he sends the boys off with a warning. WTH? Justice is done????????? THEY STOLE YOUR FREAKING PONIES WITH NO INTENTION OF GIVING THEM BACK!

More notes:
Lulu makes Tommy and Mike pee their pants. Heh.

Tommy: When are the pests going to grow up and get real horses?
Mike: They're too afraid of real horses.
Is that supposed to be funny? Oh, and they escape on their bikes doing wheelies. Sooo coool.

And then Anna says, "You're the pests, you gonzos!" *sigh*

Anna draws a map to their hideout. Pony Pal trail isn't on the map? But Tommy and Mike's hideout is? How did the girls know they had a hideout? This will become more confusing in the next few chapters.

The Pony Pals have adventures that are just as exciting as living in Africa.

Lighting campfires is illegal?

The one thing I don't like about Vivien Kubbos is that Anna's drawings take a definite turn for the worse.

Because campers are going to listen to a bunch of little girls.

I don't think Wiggins is home of the state forest, girls.

Just like in book #10, the girls are convinced they saved a million animals. But it's raining, right? Couldn't the rain have put the fire out?

Wait. This hideout is totally on your map. It says there, in black and white, "Tommy and Mike's hideout". HOW COME YOU DON'T KNOW WHOSE HIDEOUT THIS IS IF IT'S ON YOUR MAP???

I totally read this one sentence as, "Tommy loves beer." My bad, he loves ROOT beer.

Even people who know nothing about nature can figure out the difference between a bird and a whistle.

Wait. If you're going to describe useless things with utmost detail, you could at least tell me what kind of juice the Pony Pals are drinking.

Yes, it will be easy to scare Tommy and Mike into not lightning fires. Because you're all ten and you're just so scary.

Pam thinks they should report them to the park ranger. But the others don't want to do that because Mike is poor. So being poor justifies a life of crime? How come whenever Pam has a good idea, it is discouraged?

They decide to write an anonymous letter that sounds like an adult. And it sounds semi-believable up until the end:
Sincerely yours,
Someone who is watching you!!!
P.S.
Your hideout is a mess.

No self-respecting adult would write a letter like that.

More talk about Mike being poor and can't afford a big allowance. He has to call his mom "Ma" or "Ma'am".

I think Mike will figure out the note was written by a couple of kids.

They set Anna's drawings on fire and write the Pony Pals a threatening message. Yeah. Not creepy. Let's NOT tell our parents.

How mature:
Pony Pests.
Mind your own business if you know what's good for you. It's a free country. We were here first. Go away. Find another place to play with your little ponies.
OR ELSE.

Wth? They take their PONIES?

OMG IT'S NOT THAT HARD TO RIDE A PONY!

I just really wanted Snow White to get hurt or something. Hate her.

Tommy is wearing a red jacket. I thought he was rich? Why is he wearing a red cotton jacket?

Tommy and Mike's idea of fun is making fun of people. All right, I have a confession to make....

I think she's serious about having you guys arrested....

Anna is honing her acting skills.

Awww, Acorn crosses a brook to be with Anna.

Psh. They just got ambushed by Pony Pals.

And now they're letting the boys die in the woods. Ah, yes.

AAAAAGH, lame. They want to give them another CHANCE. COME ON.

Acorn attacks Tommy.

The main reason for the stealing and threatening was the fact that the Pony Pals had infiltrated the boys' clubhouse thingy. WTH? That's like killing someone for cutting you in line.

Oh, it turns out Tommy is the brains of this operation. Mike is just an innocent bystander.

WHY ARE THEY STOPPING PAM FROM TALKING TO THE RANGER!!!???? Lulu and Anna want to give them another chance. AND THEY USE THE "TWO-AGAINST-ONE" THINGY!!! AAAAAAGH! Forget them, Pam.

Ponies come before turning in criminals. *shakes head*

They feel bad for Mike. Then turn in Tommy, if you must, but you can't seriously tolerate this kind of ridiculousness.

Pam just admitted she's biased against Tommy. Great. This will help their case.

Wait, what??? Now MIKE'S wearing the red jacket??? Did they switch clothes or something?

Lol, Mike and Tommy look like kids from the 50's. "How are we going to get home, Tom?" "Shut up, Dick!"

Mike is afraid of freezing to death more so than jail.

You can't honestly think they're going to apologize. Aagh.

Surprise, surprise. They don't want your help. And they don't apologize.

Jack Stranton = coolest name ever.

The boys get caught doing the campfire thing. OMG!!! TOMMY BLAMES MIKE!!! Little toaster.

THEY GET OFF WITH A WARNING!!!!!

The Pony Pals leave without telling them the way home? Justice is done? What about the police??? HIGH CRIME! HIGH CRIME!!

Ugh. Next one I'll do is the one about sacrifice and horse shows. :P

Goodbye old paint, or Pony Pals #19: Moving Pony

Yes. All ponies move. I think we're supposed to get from the title that the pony in question is leaving town. Whatever. Lulu's jeans are too short. Then again, so are mine. I need some new ones.



Plot: Sandy Nation and her mother Maria's are moving (ON HORSEBACK???) from Powell to Reston, but they stop in Wiggins when Maria's horse gets injured. The Pony Pals assume that because Sandy has a pony, she is an amazing person, and try to become "friends" with her. But Sandy hates everyone and doesn't want to move.
Bla bla bla, about 50 pages on Sandy grumbling.
After an unsuccessful barn sleepover (This is how they become friends with people; they invite them over for a sleepover and are shocked to discover this is too much, too soon.), the girls decide to go to the river to swim. But during their lil adventure, Sandy leaves, saying she wants to go back to the Crandals' house and talk to her mom, or something.
But on their way home, Lulu discovers that Sandy was trying to go back to Powell! The Pony Pals follow her and find Sandy with a broken ankle. They help her and convince her not to go back to Powell. Um...that's it.

More notes:
Another horse? It's a miracle!

I would be crabby, too, if I had to camp in the rain with my mom for three days.

Anna, we know you're an ignorant person. Kindly try not to display your ignorance.

Pam thinks they're criminals.

It's like if there's another pony in town, it has to be the same breed as the Pony Pals' ponies. Dandy was the only exception.

They introduce themselves and each of their ponies. I don't think the nice people care.

CONTINUITY! In every other book up till now, Lulu's mother died when she was 4. In this one, they say 3. What's up with that?

Maybe she died on the day before Lulu's 4th birthday. Big question: HOW DID SHE DIE??

The pony's name is Raffle. I used to think that was the coolest name ever. But I like Waffle better.

Ew, horse named Willow. And it's a boy. Watched any Val Kilmer movies lately?

So messed up. They're moving to Reston. Maria's husband and sons took the car, and since they don't have a horse trailer, they're RIDING to Reston. WTH?? Isn't there a service that takes your horses to wherever in a trailer? I'M SURE THERE IS! Or you could BUY one.

Mrs. Crandal knows Maria. It's a small world....

Sandy: Can I call Liana now? You said I could.
Maria: Honey, don't you think it will just make you sadder?
Lulu: *Who is Liana and why would talking to her make Sandy sad?*
Gee, I can figure that out. Can't you?

Sandy doesn't want to make new friends because you're in a cult and she doesn't want to move. Leave her alone.

Okay, Sandy's just being annoying. I've noticed whenever there's a new girl in town, she's mean, shy, and self-centered. WHY IS THIS???? Are there no extroverts out there that want to move to a small horse-worshiping town?

Anna: That Sandy sure is bossy.
Like you're not....

I love Vivien Kubbos' drawings of ponies. Take that, Paul Bachem!!

Sandy looks like Dorothy Hammill with blonde hair. And Raffle is way adorable.

Sandy doesn't want Raffle outside with the other ponies. Duh. Lightning bites.

OMG, THEY'RE HAVING SPAGHETTI AGAIN! It's like our family and pasta. We're not even Italian. THAT wasn't stereotyped.

Anna compares Sandy to Rema Baxter. Can't make the connection. Rema's a desperate fiendish loser. Sandy's just mean.

Sandy's crying herself to sleep...cuz she cannot keep their attention. Sorry, Bethany Dillon song.

Pam: I don't think she knows how to make new friends.
I've heard that excuse before. Either she's a complete idiot or she knows very well what she's doing. And I think she just hates you.

Mmm, blueberry muffins.

Ew, this is so obviously a jab at Sandy.
Mrs. Crandal: It looks likeyou're stuck here with us, Maria.
Maria: I don't mind. I'll watch you teach and get some more ideas on how to run a riding school. Besides, I like making new friends.
Mrs. Crandal: Me, too.
We get it. You're daughter is a freak.

Lulu thinks Sandy is fatty because she takes a lot of food. Methinks she's running away.

Raffle tries to kill Acorn. But we don't know why. Because Acorn is the friendliest pony in the world!!

Ew, Liana's pony was named Peaches.

Sandy: Liana's my best friend in my whole life.
That sentence doesn't really flow.

Sandy is galloping on muddy ground. So the Pony Pals gallop after her to tell her to slow down. What's wrong with this picture??

Adorable picture of Acorn. He looks like he's supposed to.

Anna tries to use the whole, "It's three against one," tactic on Sandy. But Sandy basically tells her to screw off.

Sandy's being all nice. Because she doesn't want them to suspect anything. Duh.

Anna takes it seriously.

Anna also strips. Bad pictures.

Now they figure out that Sandy is a liar. Took you long enough.

You are not a good detective, Lulu. Gotta hit 'em with a dose of reality now and then.

Lulu tries to think like Sandy Nation. She makes Sandy sound all whiny. It's pretty funny.

Agh, they're calling it pony plop again.

No, Pam, don't go for help. Let's try to find Sandy ON OUR OWN with NO ADULT SUPERVISION. Losers.

Look, a huge pony imprint in the ground.
Anna: Maybe a fox got in a fight with another animal.
Are you serious?

I'm really confused as to why you can't ride with a sprained ankle. You could just mount on THE OTHER SIDE.

She sprained her ankle, I don't think she cares where help comes from.

Lulu mistakes a bracelet for a bird.

Why is Raffle wearing a halter? Is it under his bridle? Because how else did she ride there?

Sandy tries to convince the Pony Pals to help her get back to Powell. So if the police get involved, they'll get in trouble for helping a minor escape???

EVERYONE KNOWS HOW TO WRAP AN ACE BANDAGE!!

You can SO ride with a sprained ankle. Just mount on the side requiring your nonsprained foot and make your horse walk.

Ew, Sandy has two other friends and they solve problems together. Like the Pony Pals.

I have to admit, Sandy planned ahead.

Anna is shocked Sandy would have the balls to stay in the woods alone.

We have to hear stuff about Lulu's move from England. :P

RESTON AND POWELL AREN'T THAT FAR APART??? Then why is there this big drama???

You don't like Sandy, stop lying.

Sandy made fun of Pam. I like this girl.

Sorry, guys, but if you want to be my friend, you have to be smart AND brave. :P What is this, Harry Potter?

"Don't put your feet in the stirrups. That would hurt." JUST LOWER THE STIRRUPS!!! IT WILL NOT HURT!!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaagh. Lulu pulls the biggest guilt card of all: "I don't have a mother, so you should be grateful that you do!!!" Unbelievable. MANIPULATION!!

Because you had a bad day, or Pony Pals #18: The Saddest Pony

This is another book that makes me feel very, very bad for Pam. The Pony Pals are ganging up on her again and again Pam has to apologize for HER bad behavior. I wish she could escape these people. But if you ask me who's my favorite Pony Pal, I'm not sure if I have one. I'd have to say that I can probably tolerate Pam the longest, followed by (surprise!) Anna, then Lulu on the very bottom. I think #16 ruined her character for me. I hope you'll shake your head with me as we read this sad, sad tale.



Plot: Pam is out riding Lightning when she finds a pony in a seemingly abandoned barn. The pony looks very sick and the barn is in terrible condition. Pam tells the Pony Pals and they go back to visit the pony, but are caught by its owners.
Lulu and Anna want to call the police and accuse the owners of animal abuse, but Pam doesn't actually believe the owners are guilty of animal abuse. Lulu and Anna thinks this is stupid and emotionally abuse her for several pages.
Finally, the Pony Pals find out that the old people that own Ginger (the old, sick pony) are really nice and they're just poor, so they don't take of Ginger. But Lulu and Anna don't admit they were wrong and require an apology from Pam. Grrr....
The Pony Pals visit the Quinns (the old people) and offer to take care of Ginger and give them food. They also give the Quinns a cat to replace their old one and have Dr. Crandal give all the animals antibiotics. And everyone is happy.

More notes:
Jeanne Betancourt has learned personification. Actually, she learned that a long time ago, but her usage of it in this book are better.

Another example of people not controlling their ponies.

Anna: Pam, we packed the best lucnh. Ham and cheese sandwiches and, of course, brownies.
You would think they would get tired of brownies. And ham and cheese sandwiches aren't that great. At least not together.

Yeah. Eating lunch in a ghost town. Fun.

I see we have a new illustrator.... The girls actually look their age, but I hate her style. The author's, that is.


Say what? The Crandals own three ponies (Lightning, Splash, Daisy) and board several horses. Who are those several? Is Paint one of them?

Isn't it wrong to spy on people? They should at least use a different word than "spy".

"Ginger. Ginger. You are a bad old girl." That makes me laugh. No idea why.

Why is she inspecting Ginger's hoof? She only inspects one hoof. I would understand it if she did all four, but only one? Don't see the point of this.

Anna's drawings have gotten even worse because of the new illustrator. I miss Paul Bachem.

OMG, ANNA SAID "POOP"! HALLELUJAH!!

Do the police actually handle animal abuse charges? I didn't think they did. Maybe I'm wrong.

They need more evidence, Pam says. She just disagreed with the Pony Pals. Bring on the manipulation and emotional abuse.

"It's two against one. You have to do what Lulu and I want." Shut up, Anna.

What a mature response: "I know more about ponies than you do. You have to do what I want."

Pam says, "Let's go," and Anna thinks she's being bossy. Shut up, whore.

Anna's just being a brat. HATE HATE HATE. She and Lulu are pretty even on the annoyance scale now.

Gee, something couldn't be wrong with Ginger's teeth to make her not want to eat, could there?

Who would want to steal an old sick pony?

Oh, right, Pam, run away. That's pretty much a confession right there.

"They're horrible. That's why they abuse Ginger."
"He was pointing a gun at you. He wanted to shoot you."
1. They're poor and old, not horrible.
2. IT WAS A FREAKING CANE! How do you mistake a cane for a gun????

Lulu: Pam, why don't you want to tell the police about Ginger's owners?
Pam: We dont' know anything about that old couple. THey might need help, too.
This is the closest Anna and Lulu get to apologizing.
Anna: Maybe you're right.
Lulu: We don't even know their names. There's a lot we don't know about them.
That sounded like Lulu was blaming Anna. Now for the unnecessary apology.
Pam: I'm sorry I was so bossy.
Anna: I hate it when you act like that.
YOU LITTLE HYPOCRITE!!!
Pam: I know. I hate it, too.
Anna: We forgive you.
Ho.

Why, Pam?
Richard and Gertrude Quinn. Have lived on farm for seventy years.
Why not just make it a complete sentence??

My grandma's name is Shirley.

They had a black cat. Just like Shadow.

HOLY CRAP! Ginger used to pull a milk cart 30 years ago. How old is she, then???

All of a sudden Lulu is opposed to spying. Gee, you weren't opposed to it when you spied on Kim, much less 20 pages ago.

Duh. They're old. They yell because they can't hear.

The dog's name is Snappy. Heh. That's what Bob said about Oggy. That really makes me want a dog named Snappy.

They Pony Pals are even controlling Pam's breakfast choices?
Lulu: We both want orange juice and French toast. What about you?
Don't follow the crowd, Pam....
Pam: I'll have the same thing.
Aargh.

Oh my goodness. A very horrible drawing that Anna is supposed to have done. It's worse than her previous drawings.

I didn't know social workers helped old people.

Oh no, a moving story about Mrs. Harley's childhood. The Quinns gave her free milk and eggs.

Again, why would they want to steal Ginger, who is really old, has arthritis, and overlong teeth?

Aw, a picture of the Quinns. They're so adorable.

Violet Croft? That's Anna's grandma's name. That's a horrible name.

Wonder if she was related to Lara Croft....

They spell thank you "thankyou". Who edited this book??

Toby is not a cat name. I KNEW THE DEAD CAT WAS THE REASON FOR ALL THE SADNESS!!!

Duh. I told you her teeth were too long.

The Crandals have a palomino thoroughbred named J.B. Such a lie.

Ginger is 35. Daaang.

MR. CONWAY IS BACK! THE CREEPY GUY WHO TOLD GHOST STORIES FROM SUPER SPECIAL #3!

Ew, they wish upon a star.

I want Meals on Wheels. Pasta every night.

I find it weird that they consider Shadow Acorn's cat.

Anna is being way annoying and pessimistic.

Ew, Acorn is being creepy with Shadow.

Ginger isn't sad because she has arthritis and orthodontial problems. She just misses her kitty friend. Right.

So they decide to give away Fat Cat's last kitten. HOW IS HE STILL A KITTEN, at least 20 summers have passed since that incident. Maybe he is frozen in time, too.

Pam is having second thoughts about this. Just give them Fat Cat, no one likes her anyway. Keep Pal for yourself if you like him so much.

Ponies aren't often frightened by the meowing of cats.

Apparently everyone who's ever lived is somehow connected to the Quinns. Even people in real life are somehow connected to two fictional old people in a children's book.

OMG, PAL IS SO ADORABLE!

Heh. Ginger likes pain meds.

That was awful. The more I think about it, I think the Pony Pals are a cult. Because they're exclusive, secretive, and no one questions the leadership.
I need to read the three steps of identifying a cult again. Party on.
I HATE ANNA.

And they're channeling 40's noir films, or Pony Pals #17: Detective Pony

Lost cats in the woods. Sounds slightly familiar.



Plot: Anna goes to wake up Acorn so they can go riding, but finds him already awake...with a cat by his side. The cat seems to have a weird obsession with Acorn and follows the Pony Pals around. Finally, they can't stand it anymore and take it to Dr. Crandal's.
At the barn sleepover that night, THE BARN SETS ON FIRE! THE KITTY IS IN DANGER! But Acorn smells the fire and all the animals are saved in time. But everyone's favorite cat has gone missing!
The next morning, the Pony Pals go into the woods to search for him and find him in a tree, having been beaten up by a bobcat.
They take him BACK to Dr. Crandal's.
Acorn seems to really love this kitty, and Anna has always wanted a pet, so she tries to convince her mom (WHO IS ALLERGIC TO CATS!!) to let her keep him. Mrs. Harley is about to say no when she sees the kitty laying across Acorn's shoulders. She is so overcome by the cuteness that she agrees to keep him. Anna names the cat Shadow. And all is well.

More notes:
Most people don't put collars on their cats. That's a dog thing.

How convenient. It's winter vacation...AGAIN. Wait, wasn't it summer vacation in books #15 AND #16???? WHAT'S UP?

Read this sentence.
"Pam's father was a veterinarian and he took care of most of the cats, dogs, horses, cows, and pigs in Wiggins."
Since when are there cows and pigs in Wiggins? And it would've been a lot easier to say, "...all the animals in Wiggins."

Wow. Dr. Crandal is actually working on a patient. This never happens.

The Crandals suddenly have a kennel that houses A LOT of animals. This has never been mentioned before.

Oh, and they board horses. Didn't know that either.

Brandy is a girl's name.

Lol, the cat has been ALTERED. ROFL. Trouser snake.

Didn't your sister own a cat, Anna? Your mother was never allergic THEN.

This is about Lulu:
"She lived in tents, rode elephants, and hid behind bushes to watch the monkeys play."
Ah yes. Lulu the wild woman.

There's like 4 pages on Lulu and 2 paragraphs on Anna and Pam. And they're combined.

They're going to bed at 9:30. Right.

You would think they would notice if the animal clinic is in flames.

Dr. Crandal doesn't want the Pony Pals being heroes. But he's allowed to go back into the burning building.

Shouldn't you always have your horse's halter on? Unless he's alone in his stall?

I knew Anna's dad was a firefighter!

They let Lulu go back into a burning barn, but not Anna and Pam? Do the Crandals not like Lulu?

Lol. Mr. Harley looks like Darth Vader. From "Return of the Jedi". Sans helmet.

Heh. Acorn saved a bunch of animals from burning alive. All Lightning has ever done is "protect" a bunch of stupid kittens. And Snow White "saved" forest animals from certain death. Sort of. Not really.

Bad drawing: Lightning is bay and Snow White has huge eyes. After this book, I think Jeanne Betancourt got fed up with Paul Bachem and got a new illustrator.

Pam called Acorn stupid.

How do you mistake raccoon tracks for cat tracks?

Pam and Lulu call Anna stupid and try to force her to go back home. But Anna's all, "You can go home, I'ma keep looking," like Pam did in #9. Ha. And, because they refuse to be seperated for 2 seconds, they go with her.

I don't believe those are bobcat tracks. They're exactly the same size and shape as the regular cat tracks shown in the book.

Oooh, violence.

I thought cats always landed on their feet. If he gets too cold and falls, he'll just land on his feet, Lulu.

The cat is covered in blood.

If a bobcat is four times bigger than a housecat, how come its paws are only two times bigger?

We understand how to clean wounds, Dr. Crandal.

Pam: Could we keep him here?
Dr. Crandal: We aren't adopting any more animals.
You could trade in Fat Cat for this cat. No one likes Fat Cat anyway.

I still can't figure out how Mrs. Harley is suddenly allergic to cats.

"It'll be cold in there." "Hm. Let's put a pillow in it." Pillows make everything better.

Mr. Harley is a firefighter AND a carpenter?

Uh oh, infestation. Instead of investing in a cat, couldn't you just call the exterminator?

Your parents didn't want you to have a pony because you were FAILING SCHOOL, not because they hated animals. Anna, Anna, Anna....

No one sneezes just thinking about cats.

Heh. Mr. Harley likes cats and isn't allergic to them. The exact opposite of my dad.

That's dramatic. "It's my pony. He saved the cat's life."
And yet Pam gets to tell the whole exciting story? Shut up, Pam. It's not your pony. Your pony doesn't do anything cool; it just "saves" kittens.

They manage to convince Mrs. Harley in 2 seconds that they need a cat. She agrees so quickly!

Fuzzy is an awful suggestion, Pam.

They want to make the house 2x1x1. Is that really big enough?

Black Beauty is a stupid suggestion, Lulu.

No one wants a cat named Kitty, Lulu.

Pam, just shut up and stop suggesting things.

Eh. Shadow is better than No Name. *glares at Pam* I would've named him Faithful after the cat in the Tamora Pierce books, but hey. At least it's not Smokey.

Yeah. Not too bad. Anna seemed more tolerable in this one. #18 about the emo abused pony coming up tomorrowish.

YOU'VE ANGERED THE DEMONS, or Super Special #3: Pony Pals: The Ghost Pony

What is with Jeanne Betancourt and Super Specials? I'm not seeing a pattern as to when these Super Specials are supposed to come out. Maybe she just writes them when she gets bored? Lol, I just saw a noose in the shape of a heart. Not morbid at all.



Plot: The Pony Pals are digging around in Morristown, a ghost town. While they're there, they hear mysterious noises that scare their ponies! Gasp! Could it be a ghost?
Then a bunch of people start telling the Pony Pals ghost stories and they pee their pants.
But while at the Historical Society, they find a story about a girl named Emily from 1870. Emily was their age and even had a pony! How...nice. They read a stupid newspaper story about how Emily got trapped on a mountain and her pony Angel died to save her. Now they're convinced the ghostie they heard in Morristown was really Angel, but she's a nice ghost. They're not scared anymore.
Then they read Emily's diary, dig up Angel's grave, make her a new headstone, and participate in the Wiggins Historical Fair. Then they give this stupid moving tribute to Angel. Seriously. That was it.

More notes:
Since when do you need string to play with tops??

Aaargh, Anna believes in ghosts.

I believe in demons. But I don't believe there are demons in Morristown.

Wth, Snow White looks like a palomino...

Heh. Anna thought she saw a ghost in her bedroom when she was 5. Now she's afraid of them.

Pam is so annoying in this one. "That wasn't a ghostly noise. That was the wind." That's what they said in "The Secret Garden" and it turned out to be a crazy crippled boy.

So lame. The noises they hear sound like, "Oh-oo-oo, oh-oo-oo." How are you even supposed to pronounced that? Sounds like a bad pop song.

Sure, Pam. An owl made that noise. IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY.

ANNA AND LULU ARE HOLDING HANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lulu listens to tape recordings of owls all the time, so she knows it wasn't an owl noise. Wow.

They hear a whinny. GHOST PONY!!!

Yes Pam, we know there are no such things as ghosts.

IT WAS NOT THE WIND WHISTLING THROUGH THE TREES! AAAAAGH! SHUT UP!

Oh, it couldn't have been Tommy and Mike. They're in Washington, D.C. I thought Mike was poor.

A ghost town does not actually refer to ghosts.

OMG THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A MORGAN PONY! MORGANS ARE FREAKING HORSES!

Duh, Morgans are known for pulling heavy loads. Ever heard of Justin Morgan?

Angel tried to wake Emily up with nudges and hot breath. Sorry. That just sounds way funny.

How did Angel die? She was injured, but not that injured. And they did not use the phrase "put down" in 1870. Anachronistic.

SO LAME: May Angel rest in peace. She is, indeed, an Angel.
What? Why would you capitalize Angel if it's not her name in the last part? So dumb.

Yes, people tend to be sad when their animals DIE.

Mr. Conway doesn't want to talk to three 10-year-old girls. What a surprise.

Lame. He believes in ghosts. And was confronted by the ghost pony. *gag*

He also believes in the crying baby ghost. And the ghost of Mr. Warner, who trips you with his chains!!

I don't think Mr. Warner will trip your ponies. BECAUSE HE ISN'T REAL.

Yeah, riding at night, not a smart plan anyway.

Now Pam believes in ghosts.

He can't speak for the ghosts. Heh. This old man is so mean it's funny.

I wasn't sure if they had metal charm bracelets in 1870.

SHE'S DEAD, Pam. I think it's okay to read her stupid diary.

I hate people who write in their diary like it's a real person. That's why I could read "The Diary of Anne Frank".

I bet Lucy, Meg, and Emily are reincarnations of the Pony Pals.
Emily = Lulu. There's the whole "I killed my pony" guilt thing going on.
Lucy = Pam. They live farther away than the other two.
Meg = Anna. Cuz she has a mischevious pony.

Lame New year's resolutions.

Aw, read this poem.
Here lies Emily's Angel
She was a true, brave friend
May she be remembered always
It's like a bad attempt at a haiku.

PLEASE don't let the Pony Pals write something for the fair.

Aren't you supposed to be controlling Acorn, not the other way around?

They find a piece of slate that says "Ed always", and they think it can't be Angel's because it says "Ed" on it. "Ed always"? THAT MAKES NO SENSE!

Oh, duh, it's from "remembered always"!

Why does Mrs. Crandal just happen to have a big piece of slate in her garage.

Lame. Pony Pals are pretending to be from the "olden days".

And they write a horrible piece on 1870.

Creepy. They hold a seance-type grave digging thingy.

The world is a cruel, cruel place, or Pony Pals #16: The Missing Pony Pal

AAAAAAAAAAAARGH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! THIS BOOK SUCKED! I wish I could give it an F! I wish I could give it lower than an F! I wish I could ban every this book from every library and every bookstore in the world. AAAAAAGH! It SUCKED SO BAD!



Plot: Oh boy! A gymkhana! Lulu and Snow White LOVE gymkhana! But when practicing pole bending, Snow White leans too far and she and Lulu topple over. Lulu ends up bruising her thigh and Snow White sprains a tendon.
The next 70 pages are a bunch of CRAP on how AWFUL Lulu FEELS about EVERYTHING that she EVER DID, including get born. Haaaaate.
The Pony Pals try to convince Lulu it was an accident, but she doesn't believe them and literally runs into the woods (DURING A STORM!) after vowing never to ride again.
She comes back, unfortunately, and realizes that she is a big IDIOT and that it was an accident and she needs to STOP BEING SUCH A FREAKING WIMP. So then the Pony Pals win all the gymkhana games. BOOOOOOOO!

More notes:
I literally marked every single page.

I'm tired of the mention of Lulu's stay in England, and Lightning's valiant kitten rescue.

Pole bending race. Sort of self explanatory. Or at least easy to explain.

They leave Lulu lying on the ground after she falls.

Pam looks like Mrs. Laners....

Lulu has to go to the hospital. In an ambulance. Whatever.

She has NOT been living in Wiggins a short time. She's experienced like 6 summer vacations!

Why do Anna and Pam have to be exact opposites? Black, white. Tall, short. Smart, dumb. Bad artist, good artist.

I think Lulu DID hurt her brain in the fall. Or maybe it's always been like that.

Grandmother Sanders = ridiculously old fashioned. I bet she still wears petticoats.

How does the doctor know she has a big bruise on her thigh? Did he take off her pants?

Lulu thinks Snow White might be dead. Right.

Thank you for making the situation worse, Dr. Crandal.

THEY'RE EATING SPAGHETTI AGAIN!

Ponies don't moan. Or have nightmares.

WTH???? At the gymkhana, there will be a costume parade. Anna's ideas include a banana and...I'm not sure what that is. Also an artist and THE PONY COULD BE A PALETTE! HAHAHAHAHA!

Lulu would not be a good princess. Actually, yes she would. She whines a lot, but doesn't do anything about it.

Lulu keeps dwelling on stupid Snow White. "Omg, I almost KILLED my pony. *sob sob sob*"

Who's Paint? Since when do the Crandals have more than 2 riding ponies? I thought Mrs. Crandal didn't NEED a third pony!!!! WHO IS PAINT???

That's right, Lulu. Acting like a *itch will make everyone feel better.

Anna and Pam look like they want to kill Lulu.

IT'S A RACE! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GO FAST!
Lulu: Uh-uh! Safety first!
AAAAGH! SHUT UP!

Omg. Lulu = no sense of humor. Because riding is serious business. And you're not allowed to have fun with ponies.

I have nothing bad to say about Pam and Anna this whole book. I actually feel REALLY sorry for both of them.

Oooh, burn.
Pam: We need to have a Pony Pal meeting right now.
Lulu: About what?
Anna: About YOU!

They called Splash A GIRL. Um, Splash is A BOY. And Splash is NOT A NICE CALM PONY. Remember? Always rushing ahead?

Lulu is scared of squirrels.

Maybe Snow White is ignoring you because you're so FREAKING ANNOYING!!

Grandma Sandy, NOT HELPING.

YOU DIDN'T ALMOST KILL YOUR PONY! HORSES FALL DOWN IN LOTR ALL THE TIME!

THE PONY PALS ARE ACTUALLY APOLOGIZING!!!!! Well, Lulu isn't. But Pam and Anna are apologizing to her!!!! Huh. I'm proud of them.

They call Acorn a girl, too.

This totally reminds me of "Wizard Angst". "I QUIT MAGIC!"

Yeah, running into the woods is smart.

Where's the comma? "Lulu stop!"

Oh no, you're breaking all 5 Safety in the Woods rules!

OMG, Lulu almost gets struck by lightning. I cracked up laughing when I read that part.

They almost get hit by lightning again. And ANNA IS TALLER THAN PAM!!

Good thing Lulu knows how to track. The ONE thing she ever does right.

I don't think your ponies care that you are gone.

You don't have to ride to be a Pony Pal. I could be a Pony Pal if I wanted. I mean, I love ponies, I don't understand people, and I have no social skills.

Oh. We just got trapped in the woods for 2 hours. Want to go get lunch at the diner?

Anna just told Lulu to shut up. GO ANNA!

And then Anna starts crying. Yeah.

Aaaah, Lulu is not being a leader! THAT'S why Snow White is acting weird!

"My leader is back!" Totally reminds me of, "Take me to your leader."

The sack race has nothing to do with weaving in and out of poles! Stupid.

Yeah, that's right, BE SELFISH! Now your friends can't compete in the gymkhana games. Jerk.

Oh, such a sacrifice.

They win because Lulu grows a brain.

They lose every other race.

They describe Lulu's outfit to the slightest detail. And the picture is so not worth that 1000 words.

Lulu does not deserve all this special attention.

That SUCKED. Aaaargh. Tomorrow, #17 where they find another cat.

Who put that tree there?, or Pony Pals #15: The Blind Pony

Looking at the title, I REALLY wonder what this book could be about. I mean, a blind pony is definitely out of the question. And on the cover we have a very adorable pony tripping over its feet while Pam watches on with a shocked expression on her face. Lightning looks exactly the same as she did on the last cover. Dandy's back is way smaller than it should be. I don't think it can support him. Paul Bachem = worst illustrator ever.



Plot: Mrs. Baxter sells more property, because she can, and another old couple move into Wiggins! Their granddaughter Kim is visiting them for the summer and she's the Pony Pals age and she owns a pony, so she must be Mother Theresa. The Pony Pals try to become friends with her, but Kim is not very friendly and doesn't want the Pony Pals to mess with her pony.
After much investigation (like 2 hours worth), Pam finds out a shocking secret: Dandy, Kim's pony, is BLIND!!!
For some reason, Kim hasn't told anyone about this interesting development, and so far no one has noticed??? I think they would notice if the pony bumps into walls. But I digress. Now Kim is forcing Pam to keep her secret.
But the other Pony Pals find out. They always do. But they also decide to keep Kim's secret.
There is a bunch of secret keeping and frienship and doctoring (Mr. Crandal discovers Dandy's eyesight can't be restored; big whoop), and then they all decide to train Dandy to let Kim be his eyes.
Surprise! Kim's parents come earlier than expected with a new riding instructor and are shocked to find about Dandy's not so stellar (or lack of) vision. But the Pony Pals save the day and show that people/ponies with disabilities are worth everyone's time. Yeah, no heavy message there. Not like I think disabled people are worthless, but I don't use ponies as an allegory to support them. Moving on.

More notes:
Mrs. Baxter: *bla bla bla about the Wright family* Her name is Kim Wright.
Pam: I bet you want us to be friends with Kim.
Mrs. Baxter: You guessed it. I told her all about the Pony Pals. Kim is your age. But there's something else she has in common with you.
Pam: She has a pony?!
I can't wait for the day Pam is wrong, and Mrs. Baxter says, "No, actually, she's black."

An AWFUL picture of Lightning: Her head is bigger than her entire body and her legs are too thin. And Pam looks like Rudy from "The Cosby Show".

So what, she doesn't ride her pony over? Not that strange. Actually, yeah, you could ride a blind pony just as easily as a nonblind pony.

DANDY! Best pony name ever, right up there with Acorn, Tongo, Mushroom, and Bubble.

Ballin. Kim is studying French over the summer. Lucky.

There goes Anna with her snob business again. She really needs a new perspective.

They act like Kim is such a jerk. Maybe she's just shy. Or she doesn't like you.

Oh no, Kim won't let Dandy interact with Lightning!! Wait, is this the same Lightning that frequently bites people? I wonder why she's so afraid of her....

SHE JUST WANTS TO GO LAST! WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT???

Dandy bumps into a tree. Lol.

Lulu and Anna are being all mean to Kim, and then blame her for a bad time.

Um, Kim, Dandy doesn't speak English, so telling him, "There's a turn coming up," might not be that helpful.

Ha. Grandma manipulation.

Why is it weird to lead your horse into a stall?

DANDY IS HUGE IN ONE PICTURE! At least 16 hands. Um, pony?

Ugh, fluff on feelings and loving ponies and personality.

Why do we need to know how many jokes Pam told?

Dandy runs into a doorway.

Pam is all spazzing out because she can't tell her Pony Pals! Like she tells them everything. Sorry, but there are some things I wouldn't want to know unless you needed to borrow a tampon or something.

I've had friends leave a sleepover while everyone else is sleeping. It's not that weird.

Ooh, they're going to spy on Kim! How mature.

Lulu and Anna are nodding sadly. I nodded sadly for about ten minutes after reading this. It's way fun.

Yeah, another instance where they're suddenly all nice after being such hos before and no apology is necessary.

Yeah, why IS Dandy's blindness a secret? You can still ride a blind horse. And possibly show. There was that whole book on the blind dog that did agility contests. Sure, he did them really SLOW, but.... Agh, that was a sad book. I'm going to cry.

It was called "The Soul of the Silver Dog", if you want to know.

Another book about parent expectation. But Kim doesn't want to ride in a horse show! She just wants to speak French! What is this, "High School Musical"?

OMG, Kim apologized. And they didn't. Jerks.

Two sleepovers in a row? What?

WHY WOULD YOU PUT A BLIND ANIMAL TO SLEEP? YOU DON'T PUT BLIND PEOPLE TO SLEEP!

Lulu actually wrote a complete sentence for once.

THOSE DANG KITTENS AGAIN! They reference "Too Many Ponies" every chance they get. SO ANNOYING.

It takes Dr. Crandal forever to figure out Dandy is blind. "Well girls, he is definitely blind." Yeah. Like we didn't know that.

This is suddenly all medical drama-y. "Can you cure him, Doctor?"

Kim is such a nerd. She studies all the time.

Dandy looks like he's going to fall on his face in one picture. He's all about to trip.

Yes, screaming, "UP!" at him really does work.

All this diner talk makes me want a chocolate milkshake. And not the crappy kind I make with a spoon.

Why is it funny that Pam sounds just like her mother? Her mother's really mean.

OMG, MRS. CRANDAL REMINDS ME OF CLAIR HUXTABLE!!!

I'd want my daughter to have a blind pony. Actually, it would be preferable not to have one in the first place, but I wouldn't make her get rid of it.

Ugh, chapter nine is titled, "The Wrights are Wrong."

I can speak French, too! I know what tres bien means!

Mr. Wright looks like Richard Gere. And Mrs. Wright is blonde. And they look apalled. Kim is all, "Why me?"

Mr. Wright: Blind!
Mrs. Wright: What do you mean?
I mean he CAN'T SEE.

So lame.
Mr. Wright: What's anyone supposed to do with a blind pony?
Pam: Take care of him.
Lulu: Be his friend.
Anna: And love him.

Heh. Dr. Crandal's name is Robert.

Why do all the married women in this series insist on keeping their maiden name? "I'm Laura Thompson Wright." "I'm Cynthia Prindle Stewart."

Pam rubs Lightning's upside-down heart for luck. That's so Saddle Club-y.

Lol I totally pictured Kim's parents being all "Anchorman".
"You rode a blind pony? That's amazing! I'm not even mad."

It's not that hard to keep your grades up and ride at the same time.

Kim is sad that she has to leave Wiggins. DON'T BE!

Omg, there's this contest entry form in the back of the book that I filled out when I was like, I don't know, 8. It's in crappy cursive and I used a fake name.

1) What is Anna's pony's name?
Acorn.

2) What do the Pony Pals call their riding trail?
Pony Pal Trail

3) On whose estate do the Pony Pals often ride their ponies?
Mrs. Wiggins estate (yes, I realize she is single and her name is Ms.)

4) What kind of pony is Lulu's pony, Snow White?
A Welsh Pony

Circle one: girl
Name: Karen halls (lies)
Birth date: 2/17/94 (lies)
City: Venice
State: California (wtf?)

I was a WEIRD kid when I was little. I remember really hating the name Lauren and I'd always want to change it to Kristen, Karen, Candace, or some crappy K name. I like Anastasia for a long time, too. Soooooo cool. Not.
Yeah, if I had won that contest, I would've received 6 months of free riding lessons. Darn.
Well, the deadline was 1997 and I filled this out 2001ish. My grandma gave me this book. Lol. Cool beans.

I really wish I had "Circus Pony", but that will most likely never happen. Ugh, so not excited about "The Missing Pony Pal" now, because it's about a stupid gymkhana accident and Snow White gets hurt and is all wimpy and the illustrations show Anna as being taller than Pam. What??? I'll go do homework or something now.