There's no such thing as a sad ending, or Horseshoe Trilogies #3: Sweet Charity

We're finally done with this series. I'm thinking of making a collage of all the series I've posted on this blog. Lol.



Plot: Josie doesn't want to sell Charity, her specialist most favorite horse, but she has no choice. Now, to add more stress, the Graces have to find a new home.
So Josie is all emo about Charity the ENTIRE TIME. The Taylor family and their daughter Emily are pretty interested in buying her (why is it that no boys ever want to buy a horse??), which makes Josie uber jealous.
Then, one night, Charity disappears, along with all her tack! *gasp* SHE'S BEEN STOLEN!
And we know who the culprit is. Kirsty, a creepy little girl who loves Charity a little TOO much, apparently did it to help Josie?? Whatever.
So Josie goes looking for them and finds them in the boathouse, but then Kirsty has an asthma attack and somehow falls into the river. Josie goes to save her, and they're both about to drown, but Charity saves them both.
Um, yay.
So now that that's all over, Josie's parents start hinting that they've found a NEW OWNER for Charity and she's the BEST OWNER they could find. Josie can't figure it out, but then they tell her that Charity is HERS. Because her dad got a new job and now is uber rich and their new house has a field where they can keep a horse. LAAAAAME.

More notes:
Josie often has odd fantasies involving Charity and herself.... THEY'RE ABOUT RIDING!!! Sickos.

Oh, and in the fantasy, she saves a young man who's broken his leg, and his grandmother lets Charity stay for free in their stables.

Whaaaat? Looking at this cover, Charity doesn't even look CLOSE to flea-bitten. As in the color, not the state.

Josie invites Kirsty over to her house, and then is all, "OMG, SHE'S SO CREEPY AND SHE GETS ON MY NERVES!" Then WHY'D you invite her to your house?

Anna thinks Kirsty is creepy, too. Why? Does she murder animals or play with voodoo dolls?

"'No!' Kirsty said. 'I won't let them take her away from you!'"
Okay...THAT's creepy.

Okay, her parents are sort of poorish, so they're settling on a townhouse with a small backyard, and Josie's all complaining. "THIS ISN'T THE BEST HOUSE!! HOW WILL WE KEEP THE DUCKS AND CHICKENS??" You won't...because you're POOR.

Foreshadowing of the boathouse incident, and how unstable it is....

"They've got an older boy who's had a horse for a while, and now they want a horse for his younger sister. She's been having riding lessons for ages."
Hmm...sounds familiar. What do you know, she has brown hair and freckles!

Oh, if you smile shyly, you must be a nice person.

Josie storms into the house and starts yelling at her dad.

I love how her mom is so blunt and realistic.

"There are three bedrooms, but one of them is tiny, and the kitchen's not enormous, either."
"That doesn't bother me. You know how I feel about cooking."
Um, yeah, but your husband LOVES to cook. Why don't you ask him how HE feels?

Josie and Anna find a field with horses right next to the new house.
Josie: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Me: That there are horses there to take your mind off Charity?
Anna: Oooh! Charity could stay with those horses!
Me: ....

Um, duh, horses are EXPENSIVE.

Ah yes, let's lie and say that Charity has an awful disease.

Oh no, Charity's not in the field! Well, gee, MAYBE SHE'S IN THE BARN!

I'm trying to imagine the damage Josie could do to a potential horse thief.

Anna, Ben, and Josie are being detectives like the Pony Pals.

The thief knew where the key was.... Hm, MAYBE THEY'VE BEEN THERE BEFORE?

Oh, and Kirsty Fisher happens to be missing. What a coincidence.

Argh! Now that they know it's Kirsty, they're like, "Oh, she didn't mean to hurt us, it's all right." Yeah, but she stole your property. Doesn't that mean anything to you?

They didn't get any phonecalls from Mrs. Fisher...and it's Josie's fault.

"I've got a feeling she was trying to help me." Yeah, in a messed up against-the-law way.

Oh, and it turns out Kirsty is asthmatic. Just to add to the drama.

Why would you look for a girl on horseback with bikes? Wouldn't you also use horses?

Yeah, duh, use Faith.

Gotcha, Anna and Ben's dad is Spanish. Makes sense.

Faith, like Acorn, is a good detective.

Kirsty's inhaler reminded me of how my brother used to use an inhaler for allergies.

"No one's angry at you, Kirsty." I am.

Argh, she has a serious asthma attack. Just like in "Are We There Yet?".

Josie tries to throw the inhaler to her...and misses by TWO FEET. Nice throw.

Kirsty falls into the river. Wow.

Smart, go after her. Now you'll both drown, although what else could you do?

Charity saves them. This would be a good episode of "Miracle Pets".

Should I call the police first, or my parents? Police, police! She calls her parents.

Anna: I called the farmer who owns the field, but he says someone already asked him to keep a space for a horse!
Josie: Darn.
Me: ....

"My own sweet Charity. Now nothing's going to take her away from me!"
Except for possibly death and disease.

So yeah. A really awful Pony Pals tomorrow. Yaay, haven't done one of those in a while.

Thou shalt not steal, or Pony Pals #20: Stolen Ponies

I do not understand this book. If someone steals your property, the "right thing" to do would be do turn them in, right?? Aaargh.



Plot: The Pony Pals have a secret hideout. It's just so secretly secret that no one will find it.
While hanging out at the Pony Pal Lodge (their lame name for their secrety secret hideout), they see a campfire left burning in the woods. *gasp* FOREST FIRES! They put it out, and are proud of themselves for saving the whole woods.
This happens repeatedly throughout the book.
After much investigation, the Pony Pals discover it was Tommy and Mike who were starting the fires! *gasp* THAT'S ILLEGAL! (didn't know that little tidbit....) They write Tommy and Mike aa anonymous threatening letter that warns them to never light another fire ever again.
But Tommy and Mike figure out it's them and set their secrety secret hideout on fire.
And then THEY STEAL THEIR PONIES!!!
This has gone a little too far, it seems.
It's raining and the brook is overflowing, but the Pony Pals go looking for their ponies anyways. Anna then sees them on the other side of the river/brook/stream and distracts Tommy and Mike while Lulu and Pam save the day. Pam wants to call the police, but Anna and Lulu convince her this is the wrong way to go. After all, they've only broken two laws and destroyed their property. Jail is not where these boys belong.
So the Pony Pals tattle to the Park Ranger and he sends the boys off with a warning. WTH? Justice is done????????? THEY STOLE YOUR FREAKING PONIES WITH NO INTENTION OF GIVING THEM BACK!

More notes:
Lulu makes Tommy and Mike pee their pants. Heh.

Tommy: When are the pests going to grow up and get real horses?
Mike: They're too afraid of real horses.
Is that supposed to be funny? Oh, and they escape on their bikes doing wheelies. Sooo coool.

And then Anna says, "You're the pests, you gonzos!" *sigh*

Anna draws a map to their hideout. Pony Pal trail isn't on the map? But Tommy and Mike's hideout is? How did the girls know they had a hideout? This will become more confusing in the next few chapters.

The Pony Pals have adventures that are just as exciting as living in Africa.

Lighting campfires is illegal?

The one thing I don't like about Vivien Kubbos is that Anna's drawings take a definite turn for the worse.

Because campers are going to listen to a bunch of little girls.

I don't think Wiggins is home of the state forest, girls.

Just like in book #10, the girls are convinced they saved a million animals. But it's raining, right? Couldn't the rain have put the fire out?

Wait. This hideout is totally on your map. It says there, in black and white, "Tommy and Mike's hideout". HOW COME YOU DON'T KNOW WHOSE HIDEOUT THIS IS IF IT'S ON YOUR MAP???

I totally read this one sentence as, "Tommy loves beer." My bad, he loves ROOT beer.

Even people who know nothing about nature can figure out the difference between a bird and a whistle.

Wait. If you're going to describe useless things with utmost detail, you could at least tell me what kind of juice the Pony Pals are drinking.

Yes, it will be easy to scare Tommy and Mike into not lightning fires. Because you're all ten and you're just so scary.

Pam thinks they should report them to the park ranger. But the others don't want to do that because Mike is poor. So being poor justifies a life of crime? How come whenever Pam has a good idea, it is discouraged?

They decide to write an anonymous letter that sounds like an adult. And it sounds semi-believable up until the end:
Sincerely yours,
Someone who is watching you!!!
P.S.
Your hideout is a mess.

No self-respecting adult would write a letter like that.

More talk about Mike being poor and can't afford a big allowance. He has to call his mom "Ma" or "Ma'am".

I think Mike will figure out the note was written by a couple of kids.

They set Anna's drawings on fire and write the Pony Pals a threatening message. Yeah. Not creepy. Let's NOT tell our parents.

How mature:
Pony Pests.
Mind your own business if you know what's good for you. It's a free country. We were here first. Go away. Find another place to play with your little ponies.
OR ELSE.

Wth? They take their PONIES?

OMG IT'S NOT THAT HARD TO RIDE A PONY!

I just really wanted Snow White to get hurt or something. Hate her.

Tommy is wearing a red jacket. I thought he was rich? Why is he wearing a red cotton jacket?

Tommy and Mike's idea of fun is making fun of people. All right, I have a confession to make....

I think she's serious about having you guys arrested....

Anna is honing her acting skills.

Awww, Acorn crosses a brook to be with Anna.

Psh. They just got ambushed by Pony Pals.

And now they're letting the boys die in the woods. Ah, yes.

AAAAAGH, lame. They want to give them another CHANCE. COME ON.

Acorn attacks Tommy.

The main reason for the stealing and threatening was the fact that the Pony Pals had infiltrated the boys' clubhouse thingy. WTH? That's like killing someone for cutting you in line.

Oh, it turns out Tommy is the brains of this operation. Mike is just an innocent bystander.

WHY ARE THEY STOPPING PAM FROM TALKING TO THE RANGER!!!???? Lulu and Anna want to give them another chance. AND THEY USE THE "TWO-AGAINST-ONE" THINGY!!! AAAAAAGH! Forget them, Pam.

Ponies come before turning in criminals. *shakes head*

They feel bad for Mike. Then turn in Tommy, if you must, but you can't seriously tolerate this kind of ridiculousness.

Pam just admitted she's biased against Tommy. Great. This will help their case.

Wait, what??? Now MIKE'S wearing the red jacket??? Did they switch clothes or something?

Lol, Mike and Tommy look like kids from the 50's. "How are we going to get home, Tom?" "Shut up, Dick!"

Mike is afraid of freezing to death more so than jail.

You can't honestly think they're going to apologize. Aagh.

Surprise, surprise. They don't want your help. And they don't apologize.

Jack Stranton = coolest name ever.

The boys get caught doing the campfire thing. OMG!!! TOMMY BLAMES MIKE!!! Little toaster.

THEY GET OFF WITH A WARNING!!!!!

The Pony Pals leave without telling them the way home? Justice is done? What about the police??? HIGH CRIME! HIGH CRIME!!

Ugh. Next one I'll do is the one about sacrifice and horse shows. :P

Even worse than the Pony Pals, or Pony Pals #14: Pony-Sitters

How come Pam is an oldest child, Anna is a youngest child, and Lulu is an only child? I guess to further emphasize their many differences. I wish Lulu were a middle child. But then we would have more siblings to contend with. We already have Jack and Jill, the Martha Stewart clones, and Anna's older sister, who changes her name like 20 times. I'm actually in a pretty good mood today and this one wasn't that horrible, so I'm not as critical as I might be. "Circus Pony" is still in the hands of that 7-year-old....



Plot: Everyone in Wiggins, it seems, loves ponies. Mimi Kline seems to like them even more than the Pony Pals, or that annoying Rosalie kid! For her birthday, the Mr. and Mrs. Kline decide to buy her a pony and enlist Anna as her pony-sitter! Basically Anna will teach Mimi how to act around a pony and they will have a jolly old time. She will also teach Mimi how to ride.
But, because this is Anna we are talking about, she can't do anything without the Pony Pals. Now all three of them are pony-sitters!
The Klines buy an adorable Shetland pony named Tongo. Mimi loves Tongo. Tongo loves Mimi. They look so cute together.
But Mimi is a brat. She treats Tongo violently, doesn't listen to the Pony Pals, and runs around in circles. Come on, though. She's 5. She's a brat, but she's 5.
One day, Mimi runs away with Tongo and Mr. Monkey (don't ask). Her parents freak out and call the National Guard, the FBI, the CIA, and the state police.
But it turns out Mimi was just playing Hide-and-Seek with Tongo in the woods.
The Klines are convinced, like Anna's parents in Book #2, that Tongo is a bad influence and send him away.
But the Pony Pals tell them that Tongo is a good boy, and the Klines cave.
Mimi and Tongo forever.
That was boring.

More notes:
They don't actually explain who Mimi is in the beginning. And since when does Anna have neighbors besides Lulu?

"We call ourselves the Pony Pals." I don't think the nice people care, Anna.

Tongo is a pretty cute name. Totally naming my pony Tongo.

"Small ponies can be spoiled." So can big ponies....

Awwww, Bubble is a cute name, too.

It really rubs me the wrong way when people refer to horses as blonde.

I thought Mr. Olson worshiped Acorn? Apparently not?

Jeanne Betancourt needs to use semicolons instead of making a new sentence.

Doesn't kickball require more than two people? Wouldn't it be "kicking a ball" or "playing soccer" rather than "kickball"?

Yeah. Pulling the pony's tail. Not smart.

We now know that the Pony Pals eat at the diner for free. Lame.

I want a purple riding helmet really bad.

Really, how hard is it to ride? You sit. They pull. Horse goes. Well, when you're a little kid. When you're older, they start on the stupid technicalities.

Mimi talks to herself in third person.

And she wants to see Tongo's bellybutton.

Do ponies really not have bellybuttons? I'm going to check up on that.

Tongo so ugly in all the pictures.

Where do they keep Tongo if they're riding up and down the driveway? I'm not seeing a stable for this family.

AAAAAAAAAGH! You don't have to know that much about horses to let a little kid play with one. Just utilize proper safety habits.

I hate this sentence:
"He did whatever Lulu asked him to do. Walk. Trot. Or halt."
WHY??? WHY CAN'T YOU USE COMMAS????

I remember class trips to the museum. I've never been to an actual museum with dinosaurs and paintings and stuff, tho. Only to the Washington State History Museum or whatever and that stupid Seattle Art Museum. Jealous.

Mrs. Bell is an idiot.
Pam: After, we're having dinner at the diner with Lulu's father.
Lulu: He's going to tell us about his trip to India. He was in India studying monkeys. (you didn't have to say India twice)
Mimi: I have a monkey! He's MY Mr. Monkey.
Mrs. Bell: Mr. Monkey is a stuffed animal.
NO. DUH.

They saw a painting that looked just like Mr. Monkey! I totally pictured a sock monkey when they mentioned Mr. Monkey. *shudder* What kind of sicko takes time and energy to paint sock monkeys?

Mwahahaha, they think something terrible has happened to Mimi.

They've been at the museum all day. Of course Mimi isn't with them.

They think someone kidnapped Mimi. Yeah. Right. Mrs. Bell was there, she would've heard the screaming, or at least someone randomly walking in. How exactly are they picturing this scene?
Kidnapper: Hey, kid.
Mimi: WHAT?
Kidnapper: Come with me.
Mimi: Okay. Let's go visit Tongo!
I bet he was wearing a ski mask, too. Isn't a ski mask the red flag?

They think maybe she went to visit a friend. I totally expected Mrs. Kline to say, "SHE HAS NO FRIENDS!"

Still not saying poop. Now they're saying "pony plop". Better than "you-know-what".

Oh. She's playing Hide and Seek with Tongo. OF COURSE. In the woods. At night. No danger here!

What? Pam and Lulu are working their butts of, too, but Anna is the only one getting paid????

Mr. Monkey is kind of cute....

Why is it Anna's fault that Mimi is losing her pony? Can't figure that out.

The Klines own a hardware store. Didn't know that either.

Oh, Anna didn't teach her enough safety and let her think she could be a Pony Pal. I'm sure that's why she ran away, Anna.

Mimi wasn't really lost. But the Pony Pals withhold this information till the end.

Heh. Mrs. Bell is all Italian.

Rosalie and the Pony Pals seem to have been frozen in time, because everyone else grows older but they're still the same age.

Mimi is subjecting Rosalie to slave labor.

AAAAAAH! Mimi is going to grow up to be a serial killer, because she blames everything on Mr. Monkey/split personality.

The Klines think Anna is on the crack corn, too.

The author felt she had to describe how each character laughed at Mimi's witty joke.

Mimi has more energy than a million batteries. Heh.

Oh boy. That was...really boring. But Super Special #2 is up next! Ooh, a special edition pony topper??? Check it!

The Stories of Our Ponies
Pony Pals Super Special #2

The Pony Pals want to write a book about their ponies. They interview past owners, and even meet Snow White's foal! This great story comes with your very own Pony Pal pencil with a fuzzy pony topper and specially designed mini-notebook, plus a free pony portrait bookmark and two collecting cards.

You'll love this very special Pony Pals book!

Man. I guess Acorn didn't father Snow White's baby. :(
OMG, I read the plot summary for Super Special #4 and Snow White and Acorn HATE EACH OTHER! LOL! And I thought they were lovers. Wow, was I wrong. So Lightning and Pam have to play peacemaker. Not peachmaker.
So jealous. I want a fuzzy pony topper.