Won't you be my neighbor?, or FTFO Madison Finn: Only the Lonely

Yaaaaaay!!! Since Pony Pals are STILL keeping me waiting, I checked out 4 or 5 Madison Finns to keep me going. Heeere we goooooo...


Plot: Almost-7th grader Madison Finn is really lonely. It's summertime and her two best friends are at camp, her mom is always working, and her dad is out of the country. She meets a girl named BigWheels (that's her screenname, not her actual name) and tries to make friends, but BigWheels doesn't seem to want to talk to Maddie! *gasp*
She's bummed (her word, not mine) until she meets *cue sappy music* Fiona Waters, a girl who just moved into the neighborhood. They meet, find out they have a lot in common, and hang out all summer long.
Uh oh. Aimee and Egg, Maddie's friends, are back from camp! But they seem rather....different? Aimee is suddenly bossy and Egg is obsessed with wrestling! Also, they don't seem to like Fiona.
School starts. Madison doesn't have many classes with Aimee or Egg, but she has plenty with her ARCH NEMISIS POISON IVY!!! It also seems Hart Jones, once the bane of her existence, has returned, and he's really hot???
Uh oh! Fiona starts hanging out with Poison Ivy! Maddie doesn't know how to tell her this isn't kosher and starts avoiding her. Fiona is confused, Aimee is mad, and Egg is still stupid.
Finally, at Drew's BBQ, they work it out. Fiona, Aimee, and Maddie are friends forever. BigWheels and MadFinn are keypals. Everyone is happy. The End.

More notes:
I marked like the first 100 pages about Madison's boring summer, but now that I reread them, I can't find anything remotely funny/interesting.

Aaaagh, these books reminded me so much of my 7th grade days, a mere 2 years ago.

Madison makes REALLY funny noises when she's mad

Wow. They have internet perverts in preteen literature.

When you enter a chatroom, how many people actually discuss the chatroom topic? For example, Harry Potter. The people in there NEVER discuss Harry Potter. At least not often.

Awww, sounds like BigWheels has dial-up, too. And she lives in Washington, which is pretty cool.

I'm jealous. Madison lives in New York.

Whoa, she eats takeout practically every night! Lucky.

I want to live on Blueberry Street.

Wow. I have never worn a sweater set or a cardigan. Okay, actually, I've worn both, but not recently.

Lol, this is the best e-mail I've ever seen.
From: Eggaway
To: MadFinn
Subject: hi
Date: Wed, 23 Aug 3:21 PM
Hey Madison, whassup? Hey computer camp rocks so much I don't want 2come back 2 stupid Far Hills! I cant believe 7th grade is here in like a min. Hey anyway I miss yor stupid dog Phin. LOL!!! Is he still FAT? I think you and me should defniteley take that cmpter class together in school by thewaynow that you have this ok talk l8R. Drew says hi BTW. Write back BYE!
ADD much?

Whoa, someone threw an egg at him, so now his name is Egg. Yeah, hilarious. His real name is WALTER.

Smoky green eyes make you a model.

I'm reminded of that "Clifford" episode where Emily Elizabeth couldn't spell monkey: "Monkey. M-O-N-K-Y. Monkey." DON'T ASK WHY!!!

This series is kind of hilariously dumb at times, but they accurately portray puberty; fuzzy legs, lack of boobs, first period (only Madison never gets hers because she is forever frozen in time at the age of 12, like the Pony Pals).

I wish I had a tattoo. Ugh, Aimee is SO annoying.

Wth, being involved with an older guy at 16 is STILL illegal.

Wizard of Oz impressions? Wth?????

Phin almost gets hit by a car.

Madison thinks Mr. Waters sounds like Darth Vader's brother. Racist.

Question mark? Don't most people have computers now? It's like a necessity.

Lol. Friendship quizzes. This reflects my life perfectly.

Don't talk to strangers, Madison.

Lol, she believes in the 11:11 wishing, too!!!

Making Pop Tarts is NOT cooking.

EW!! Fiona thinks Egg is cute. I WILL POST A PICTURE OF HIM, HE IS DEFINITELY NOT CUTE!! People say I have weird taste in guys, but I have never in my life thought Walter Diaz was a hottie.

They play a computer game called "Makeover Magic".

Whatever. They SO make you start thinking about college in 7th grade. College Ed, anyone?

Whaaa? Fiona is 12 and she's had 2 boyfriends. WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE??

Ugh. Madison references Girl Scouts. I hate Girl Scouts so much. I was like the Girl Scout outcast and I was never very crafty.

I love cookies, though.

Madison talks at length about Aimee's boobs. .............

It took me forever to figure out that Fiona's scrnname "Wetwinz" was actually "We twins" with a z. Cuz she has a twin brother. Yeah.

Aaaah, Poison Ivy is introduced.

Laaaame. Ivy Daly used to be Maddie's BFF until Egg and Ivy got in a fight at kickball, Ivy started a rumor about Madison and the principal got involved. WTH??? Ivy, I think your problem is with EGG.

Egg thinks Ivy is hot. She's ridiculously pretty for a 7th grader.

Lol. "Don't wear anything white on the first day unless of course you have a good tan in which case you should wear white on the first day and every day after that until the tan fades away."

Egg calls Ivy a "tease". The nice word for "slut". Ouch.

Hart calls her "Finnster". They make him sound short. EW. And Madison's all, "Wth? Who are you? You're really hot, so I think this must be a mistake." "I'm Hart." "Say WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?"

I've never been late to class, actually. But Madison is late on the very first day of school. Bummer.

Fiona keeps talking about California and how awesome it was. :P Reminds me of my math class last year when all my table mates had lived in California for like 8 million years and kept talking about how much better it was than Washington....

Lame. She ditches Fiona.

I like how at school a lot of my friends hate each other??? Sort of awkward.

Ew, Drew is so stalker.

Lame, Aimee starts badmouthing Fiona. I would slap her.

I think you don't find out about Maddie's parents being divorced until page 136. So yeah. They're divorced.

OMG, MADISON LIKES HARRY POTTER!!!!!!!!

Dang, her 6th grade year sucked, too.

Ew, they have a science BLOCK! Where they dissect VIRTUAL FROGS!! It's bad enough dissecting a real frog, but a VIRTUAL frog, with virtual gore and virtual smells and virtual poop in the virtual colon. Thank God my frog was a boy, because I did NOT want to open up that egg sack.

I don't get why Aimee is all mad at her....

Bigwheels gives sage advice.

Jumpers and skorts...not gonna fly in 7th grade.

Fiona is way nice about all this.

It's so obvious that Drew lurvs Maddie. He's all shy and annoying and "come to my party or skiing in Switzerland".

Drew happens to be filthy rich???

So that was the fabulous first Madison Finn book. I swear, this is sadly the best book I've read in a while. NO LIE. I'm going to continue to do these and Pony Pals, maybe Avalon, and maybe that Unicorns of Balinor series? Y'all know what I'm talking about? Aggh. You will soon enough.
OMG!! PICTURE OF EGG!!!


And someone made this AWESOME collage, I swear, I'm so jealous. I wish I'd made it. I found it here.

People (in order from left to right): Aimee Gillespie, Dan Ginsburg, Fiona Waters, Egg Diaz, Madison Finn, Hart Jones, Chet Waters, Lindsay Frost, Ivy Daly, Francine Finn (Madison's mom), Jeff Finn (Madison's dad), Stephanie Finn (Madison's step-mom).
Yeah. So I basically gave away a lot of the series with this collage. You'll figure out why later. But yeah. SO EXCITED FOR MORE!!